Okay so when FH and I got engaged, I wanted to set our date for 2007. It was just the way I wanted it. I personally thought it was a better idea for us, especially since I am finishing school this semester, plan on looking for a job at the beginning of this summer and really didnt think I needed the extra burden of planning a wedding. Plus weddings are so expensive, that i didnt mind the extra wait to save money either.
Well I am getting really depressed with feeling like I have to justify my decision as to why I am waiting. Today I see a my moms cousin and he asked why we were waiting SOOOOOO long. I just kinda played it off, and hten he had the nerve to turn around and say in front of me, 'oh kids these days, they just love saying their engaged.' I thought it was extremely rude, it sounded like I just said it to be 'cool' and like I have no intentions whatso ever of actually going through with it.
I dont even enjoy telling people that I am engaged. Why bother if people only have smart a$$ remarks. Sorry for venting, just a littled POed today. TIA
Jax430
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
That was a very rude comment! There is nothing wrong with a long engagement.
Boop2704
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
People will always have comments. You just have to try an ignore them. 2007 is not all that far away. We were wating about 18 months to get married from the time we got engaged and people asked us why we were waiting so long. I didn't think we were waiting so long. We had to save some money!! Nxt time someone asks you why your waiting so long, ask them if they are paying for your wedding!!
rafiki
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
i feel the same way. i just recently got engaged (two weeks ago) and we are planning a sept 2006 wedding. EVERYONE asks why are you waiting so long? i usually come up with a smart aleck remark because i get SO ANNOYED. the last person who asked me that i replied by asking if they wanted to plan the wedding for me. seriously though, what's the difference when we get married? we're going to be together for the rest of our lives.
i am moving into FH's condo at the end of this month and refuse to start planning this wedding until AFTER i am settled in.
anyway, i agree that it is annoying but overall most people are annoying. i guess you just have to ignore the comments otherwise you'll drive yourself mad.
VogueBride
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
i understand that...i was about 18 mos when we set our date till our wedding, and i still got comments like that. they arent worth it though.....you need to do whats best for you and FH
newnybride2be
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
FH and I have been living together for almost 2.5 years now, so what diff does it really make whether or not we get married tomorrow or three years from now.....I dont see us breaking up anytime soon. I just wonder where people's heads are at times to make judgemental comments.
May05Bride
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I was engaged for two years, and constantly heard those remarks! The only reason we decided on a two year engagement was to save money (since we are paying for our own). The comments never bothered me. I would constantly hear gasping, and why so longs, and other comments, but I always just answered that my financial situation did not allow for us to get married sooner.
Now, with my wedding day two months away, everyone now comments how unbelievably fast time flies!!!!
SomethingBlu
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
Fi and I have been dating for almost 9 years, engaged for 4 of those...I have heard every stupid remark possible. From an actual 'finally' or 'it's about time' to 'why bother at this point' honestly, people suck and like to give their unwanted opinion, but you will find that out soon enough. Being engaged is like having a 'tell me dumb advice' sign posted on your forehead. Next time your family makes an unwanted comment ask them what's their ruch and if they'd like to help pay for the wedding. That should shut them up.
And don't worry, 2 years is not an insanely long time!
belle31125
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
Don't worry.. when I get married we will be engaged for 23 months.. people would always question us, but now they realize it was a wise decision, we were able to save for the wedding and buy a house.. so sometimes people dont realize
newnybride2be
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thank you guys for your comments its made me feel so much better. I know there are always going to be stupid comments, but I just needed to let off some steam today. Thanks so much for listening
rafiki
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
Posted by SomethingBlu
Being engaged is like having a 'tell me dumb advice' sign posted on your forehead.
OMG, that was absolutely hysterical and so true!!! I might have to borrow this phrase from you.
lrs2005
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
Posted by rafiki
Posted by SomethingBlu
Being engaged is like having a 'tell me dumb advice' sign posted on your forehead.
OMG, that was absolutely hysterical and so true!!! I might have to borrow this phrase from you.
So true! Could not have said it better myself. We have been engaged since last May and I have gotten flack about it from my religious family members who were like - oh you KNOW traditionally you are not supposed to be engaged for more than a year. Well that's nice. It did not work well for us scheduling wise - so please deal and keep those lovely comments to your self - thanks.
AJsMommy122
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
We had a 2 year engagement and heard it all All I can say is TIME FLYS!!!!!!!!! I am happy our wedding was paid off and we didn't have to go into a drop of debt for it. We didnt even have to really 'struggle' to save for it since we hade such a long stretch of time to do it over. That is what was best for us and the end result is still the same. We are married and happy.
Happybride2005
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
on tues, we'll be engaged 2 yrs. since we have to pay it ourselves we needed to save money. once we picked a date and told people, its about time. if people should ask why ru waiting so long, you should say if you want me to get married sooner, do u want to pay for it
kris15198
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
THat was rude, though I myself have had my share of comments. When I tell them my reasons why most people agree and then there are others who don't. Whatever your reson is for waiting, it's a good reason.
As long as you and your FI are happy with this decision that's all that matters. You will find many more people who will support you in your decision to wait then those who don't.
RedHead
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
I think you should be proud of your decidion and not feel upset when people ask!
You are a responsible adult making decisions for all the right reason...
I commend you! Do not let silly people take anything away!
amyandbill
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
I am sorry but people just say stupid things. I was with my fh for 9 years before he proposed and people start saying things like maybe he just doesn't want to be with you! When you get married is up to you. Enjoy your long engagement there is NOTHING wrong with it...people are just overly critical.
LuckyMe
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
It was rude, definetly. I have to put up with, 'Oh so you moved the wedding?'because we went from 06 to 07 for the same reason you planned on 07 plus we have 5 kids together. I also get the why bother just get married in city hall! I personally agree with why your waiting and who cares what other people think. FH and I have been together for almost 5yrs.
eric'sbride
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Re: Is this rude?? sorry long vent
Yes, it was rude. But, we got rude comments, too. We got engaged in Jan '03 after nearly 7 years of dating and didn't start even booking anything until Apr. 04 (end of April) when we booked our hall. Our wedding is not until Jun. '05. Just ignore them. Its not worth getting upset over!
