Just a thought....

You know how before you started planning your own wedding you never (I never) realized how expensive it is?

So I am going over my guest list, and can't decide who to invite. I say to fh 'how can we invite this 14 yr old and not that one' and before you know it you have ten 14 year olds and it is costing another $1500.

Where do you draw the line? I am having trouble with this- who gets a guest and who doesn't, how do you give this one a guest and not that one- it is driving me crazy!!

Re: Just a thought....

Maybe give yourself a strict guidline like no one under 18 gets a guest, or if no one under 18 invited. And STICK to it. No ifs ands or buts.

Re: Just a thought....

Im doing no children under 18 except for 3 of his first cousins(that we see every month).
And we are only giving guests to people who will not know other people there..

Re: Just a thought....

I am having the same dilemna... Who do you invite with a guest and who do you not?

If they dont know anyone at all, definitely guest invited. But how about the rest?

Re: Just a thought....

I am doing the same thing as butterfly.... but not the children thing. All of his 2nd cousins are well behaved, so we invited them.

Re: Just a thought....

also.. i think chippatrid said they arent inviting people they havent seen in like over a year or something...
thats another good idea to cut people down

Re: Just a thought....

Yes, it is very considerate to allow a guest for people who don't know anyone else. Other than that, only engaged couples need to be allowed a guest - no boyfriend/girlfriend dates. As for children, I found it is not as important to draw the line at one particular age and say no one under 18, for example, as it is to draw the line with family you see frequently and those that you don't. Close relatives do not belong in the same category as your mom's co-worker, for example.

This has worked for us in the past, and hopefully will work for my daughter's wedding.

Good luck.
Mary (MOB)

Re: Just a thought....

Freidns of mine did it this way... No ring on the finger no guest. They didn't care what age you were.

Re: Just a thought....

my cousins wedding when I was 11 years old, I was invited as a separate invitation with a guest! at 11!!! Sometimes it looks like they just want a bigger gift

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If you are married or engaged obviously, but otherwise only those over 21 will be invited with a guest. No over 21, no guest. Plain and simple. You dont like it, dont come. I am being very strict on that.

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we drew the line at 16, you had to be 16 or older unless you are in the wedding party. People did not like it, but too bad. The are not paying for it I was.

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I would do 16 or older, but fh has first cousins younger than that, and their parents are flying in from far (florida, mostly). So we have to invite those kids.

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We stopped at first cousins! No children that were not nieces, nephews or first cousin.

Re: Just a thought....

for kids, we stopped at first cousins. For adults, we invited everyone with a guest. I'm not one to pass judgement on how serious a relationship is based on whether or not they're engaged. If my guests felt more comfortable bringing someone, I wanted them to have that option.

Most singles did not bring anyone. There were only 2 people I can recall, that brought dates they weren't seriously dating.

Re: Just a thought....

I didn't want to start evaluating every one of our single friend's relationships, etc., so we invited everyone over 20 with a date.

Luckily, I don't have many younger kids in our family - it was an evening reception so we didn't have any young kids, and the youngest teenager was 19.