Ladies Vs Real Women
Ladies - If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant 'fix me up.'
Real Women - If you over-salt a dish while cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women's motto: 'I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes.'
Ladies - Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?
Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying your *** on the couch, with your feet up anyway.
Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs
Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the cake.
Real Women - Go to the bakery-they'll even decorate the sonofabitch for you.
Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
Real Women - Sara Lee frozen frickin' pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over ****, so don't do it.
Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbor guy to do it.
AND FINALLY THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP...
Ladies - Don't throw out all the leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
Real Women - Leftover wine???
Real Women - If you over-salt a dish while cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women's motto: 'I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes.'
Ladies - Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?
Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying your *** on the couch, with your feet up anyway.
Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs
Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the cake.
Real Women - Go to the bakery-they'll even decorate the sonofabitch for you.
Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
Real Women - Sara Lee frozen frickin' pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over ****, so don't do it.
Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbor guy to do it.
AND FINALLY THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP...
Ladies - Don't throw out all the leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
Real Women - Leftover wine???
