Little sister is really ticking me off...

So, my younger sister is 13, and is a part of my bridal party. Everytime I try to share anything about the wedding she has this additude like I'm bothering her and she doesn't want to be involved.

It really hurts that she doesn't care - and the other day i almost got to the point where I wanted to ask her not to be involved.

Now I know she's 13, but I have two friends who's sisters are the same age as her and were recently involved in weddings - and they were all excited and as far as i know didn't give them any problems. I mean, when I was 11 I was in my cousin's bridal party and I was so thrilled that I was asked to be in it.

Should I just chalk it up to her being 13 and a b1tch, or should i talk to her and my dad/step-mom about what's going on?


Thanks

Deb, my sister is 27 and acts uninterested as well.
As much as it hurts, you just have to chalk it up to the fact that wedding planning just isn't for everyone, and as much as little details thrill us, they're just a drop in the bucket to other people.
Sorry!

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Posted by jennandrob

Deb, my sister is 27 and acts uninterested as well.
As much as it hurts, you just have to chalk it up to the fact that wedding planning just isn't for everyone, and as much as little details thrill us, they're just a drop in the bucket to other people.
Sorry!

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thanks... but i wasn't even talking details with her - it was about getting fitted for her dress!

I don't know... i guess it's her whole additude in general lately. I mean, I know that age is rough, but her good days are what my bad days were when I was that age.... The only time i saw her the whole weekend when i was at my dad's was when we ate... oh, and when we sat in the car and she was hitting me or my brother the whole time... and nothing was done by my dad or step-mom (and yes, i tried to stop her, but she bit me )

I mean, isn't this phase supposed to be over when they're like 4?!?!?

Unfortunately, 13 is a rough age. And some are a little more immature than others. I would definitely sit her down and talk to her about it before you make any drastic decisions about removing her from BP entirely. If that doesn't go over well I would talk to your dad and step-mom just to call in some reinforcements. And if all else fails boot her to the curb.

Unfortunately, it's not her wedding day and maybe she isn't old enough to grasp the concept of being happy for others. I know if I was young and involved in day like yours I would be happy to go for a fitting just because it would give me an oppertunity to play 'dress up'!1

You know..... I don't have brothers or sisters and I probably should not comment because of that, but, I have a 23 year old cousin who is in the Bridal Party and she is acting the same way. My mom cought a coment that seemed that she was jealous, and my mother said,' But shes so much older then you are, your turn will come.' They could feel that the big topc is our weddings, so they act up. A little green eyed monster seems to be going on to me.

I'm sorry to hear that, Deb.

Regardless of how she is acting - and it could be for any number of reasons, if you remove her from the bridal party, there will be a riff in your relationship you may never be able to repair!

Not all 13 year old girls are alike - just like not all 26 year old girls are alike. You can chalk it up to age, or just who she is, at least at this point in her life. Maybe she is jealous, maybe she is hurting about something that seems trivial to adults, but is very real to her.

Either way, if she is seriously biting you at her age, she may need to talk to someone to sort through her feelings...

i think it's just the age. when i was 13 i couldn't be bothered with anything - all i wanted to do was zone out with my walkman on. i remember being with my whole family in italy and my sister (13 yrs older) and i arguing the ENTIRE time. we absolutely hated each other.

but i might approach her one-on-one and ask her if something is going on.

thanks ladies...

The thing is, if she doesn't want to be involved, I don't want her to feel like she has to be. I'd rather her not be in it then spend the whole day sulking or pitchng a fit.

Teenagers

I think i'm changing my mind about wanting a girl one day...

I have to agree with all of the above. 13 is a horrible age. Not all kids are the same, but in general they are moody, selfish and uninterested in anything unrelated to them and their friends. She'll be glad she was a part of your wedding when she's 23, so speak to her - try to be interested in her world for a bit (ask without sounding intrusive about friends, hobbies, etc.). She might not come around fully, but you can make some progress.

Best wishes!

I hate to tell you, but when my sister got married I was the same b$tch. I'm not proud of it, by any means and there were so many things going on that I couldn't even fathom. I was sad that I didn't have even a boyfriend and here was my sister all grown up and the person I've always looked up to, in love and getting married something every girl dreams about. It seems silly because she's only 13, but in adolescent minds everything is the end of the world and really 'developmentally' she is doing exactly what she's supposed to do, be anti-authority everything! the focus is on you (as it should) and your big day which takes the focus off of her and the day to day things that go on in her adolescent life. Its not fair, its not right becuase this is something amazing that is going on in your life that she should be so happy about but at that age, heck, I just wasn't happy about anything and my GOD was I moody as all heck. I loved my sister, I was so happy for her underneath it all but to be honest, it was this selfish thought that not only was she getting all the attention but I was just so jealous that she was so happy. I know it sounds crazy, it doesn't make any sense to me now but know that she really does love you and probably is very proud of you, just is expressing it in her teenage ways....

thanks everyone - i'll try to talk with her this weekend... i doubt it will work though, she'll probably be in a bad mood all weekend since she won't be able to sit on her computer the entire time (we're all going up to LI to visit w/ our grandmother).