Would you consider buying a house closer to your MIL? Let's say you used to have a not so good relationship with her and now you do and everything seems to be working out much better. My thinking is, she does not work and if I have to continue working at least part time, I would be close enough to her to be able to drop the baby off (once we are ready to have babies of course). Is this not a good idea? Have any of you done this? What has been your experiences? I don't want to buy a house based on that reason only. I know she wants us to be closer to her. We currently live about a half an hour away right now.
ewickens
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
Currently my ILs live 5 miles away and I get along with them, but it's too close for my comfort. Next town over would be nicer.
DandS
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
We live closer to my IL's then my parents but I always got along with them. My IL's are the best and I would have bought the house right across the street from them if I could have. They are about 7 minutes from us now. We only see each other about once every 2 weeks due to our work schedules, but I think living close to family was very important to me. My brother is only 3 minutes from me, my SIL and BIL's (2 of them) are about 5 minutes from me, and IL's are about 7 minutes from me. My parents are in the process of trying to sell their house and they will be moving out by us as well. I love family and I love being so close to everyone.
EmberLynn
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
Its really your choice. I personally wouldn't do it, even if our relationship was good. I think space away from parents is important when your married. I would suggest aim for the next time over. You don't want to have her stopping by every day all the time. But you have to weigh all the pros and cons to it.
SIBride06
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
We are moving 2 doors down from them... Not a terrible thing, but it could be much worse. I put it this way.. I rather see them for a few minutes a day for a hi & goodbye rather then travelling & have to spend HOURS with them, (Especially when I have a gazillion things to do). I get along with my inlaws, so for me, I never really thought twice about it.
October Bliss
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
IMHO, living 1/2 hour away isn't that bad. Personally I would prefer not to live any closer than that.
In your case given that the relationship wasn't always so good, I would certainly not move too close.
Goldi1021
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
I wouldn't - things change.
I live 10 minutes TOPS from my mother, but she doesn't interfere or become bothersome in any way. Nor does she have expectations that I will be there all the time. Both of my sisters are about 20-25 minutes from her and my brother over an hour.
We are about 20-25 minutes from my ILs and the same holds true - no expectations.
HOWEVER I would not want to live any closer to either set of parents. In fact, if my mother did not have so many medical needs that she needed help with, I would be inclined to move further away. Someday, we will move - call it a gut feeling.
angnick
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
i wouldnt live that close.. we are 12 miles from my in laws right now, and that is good.
BellaEyes
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
I love being close to family to but I don't want to be as close as the same town. I would not want them stopping over when ever they want. Thanks girls for your opinions.
Katie&Chris2006
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
It really depends on the situation. For me, living in the same state as my ILs would probably not be the best thing for my marriage.
MrsBrags7706
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
I live RIGHT NEXT DOOR to them. Its so close, we practicly share a driveway. and lemme just tell u - its just a ton of fun! [note the sarcasm]. It has its upsides and downfals....like when ur in the bathrm and u run out of toilet paper...send DH next door to get some...............and when u realize omg, Im out of milk...run next door! hahaha! lol but sometimes it can get annoying...like when u walk outside in the bakyard in ur funky pjs and slippers and ur hairs a mess, ur MIL is greeting you and the dogs and u look a mess. [sigh] i keep telling myself its not a forevrr thing ... *tear* i'd rather live nest door to MY MOM, 'least her cooking is GOOD!
kissy27
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
I personally don't think I would live on the same block or even a block away from my IL's. It is a personal preference! My IL's are the type that would smother you. Currently we are 20 minutes away & it is a perfect distance. DH & I have busy lives & don't need the interference.
On the other hand, my parents live 2 miles from us. My parents are not the type of people to interfere in our relationship nor expect us to be there everyday. I do make it a habit to go there everyday though as I get home 2-3 hours prior to my husband.
When kids come, we know that we can count on both sets of parents to be there especially in a bind. I believe it is all about your own personal 'comfort' zone.
BellaEyes
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Re: Living closer to your in-laws
Posted by kissy27
I personally don't think I would live on the same block or even a block away from my IL's. It is a personal preference! My IL's are the type that would smother you. Currently we are 20 minutes away & it is a perfect distance. DH & I have busy lives & don't need the interference.
On the other hand, my parents live 2 miles from us. My parents are not the type of people to interfere in our relationship nor expect us to be there everyday. I do make it a habit to go there everyday though as I get home 2-3 hours prior to my husband.
When kids come, we know that we can count on both sets of parents to be there especially in a bind. I believe it is all about your own personal 'comfort' zone.
See that's the thing.. I like DH's parents and all but they do happen to be somewhat smoothering.. especially his mom and I understand that she is lonely now but I would feel uncomfortable if we moved to the same town and they just came over when they felt like it. As it is.. we live 30 minutes away and she wants us there once a week!
How can I tell my husband this without him freakiing and making it seem like I am not family oreiented? I truly am.. but I have a comfot zone.
