LIW mascot.. badddd day..UPDATED in 1st post with moms version.

umm so my dad works in the same building as me. Anyway during passing time he comes up to my room laughing hysterically. Im like Uh oh this cant be good.

He said...'FRED ate a bird'

me: WHAT??!!??

dad: **practically crying he is laughing so hard** yea I just got off the phone with your mother and he caught a bird.

me: **jumping up and down and screaming while my students are laughing at me** OMG is it dead...what if he gets BIRD FLU...(this makes dad and students laugh even harder)

dad: No he didnt kill it, he had it by the WING and it was FLAPPING AND SQAUWKING as he was running around the yard

me: WHAT DID MOM DO??!???

dad: She chased him around the yard with a piece of bologna and finally got the bird out of his mouth.....he walked around looking confused and then flew away.

me: HYSTERICAL laughing at the thought of my mother doing this....


CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE !!! I wish i had a video camera.



NOTE---- if you think this is funny you should herar my moms version of the story



ETA moms version...

Ill do this the best I can. Imagine a 5'4 tiny blond woman telling this.

OMG jennifer, that @#@#@ dog is insane. I was looking outside and all of the sudden he stuck his little butt up in the air and was crawling along the pool like a mouse and then POUNCE and he took off like a lunatic. I opened the door and gheard the SCREACHING anf then I saw the #@#$##ing dog with one wing hanging out of his mouth flapping a million miles an hour. I said 'FRED here fred FRED DROP THE BIRD'. Then he started to WACK the bird with his right paw to try and pin it. I ran in the house and got a piece of bologna to try and tempt him to drop the bird. I thought I was going to have to PRY it out of his mouth and that the bird was gonna peck my eyes out. FINALLY the #@$#ing dog spit out the bird. The poor bird didnt even know where he was and walked around in circles. GO LOOK theres feathers all over the yard!!!


HAHAHAHHAHA my mom just came in and said 'ya know jen.. I dont think he wanted to KILL it. He didnt like CHOMP the bird. He even let the bird go a few times and pounced it but he didnt ***now making chomp a claw with her had and CHOMPING them to demonstate**** eat it.