My brother is a marine officer. As it stands right now, I've just found out that he'll definitely be deployed from the end of 2010 to the end of 2011. My wedding is February 19, 2011. I lucked out with the place and time and everything, and I was just starting to get really excited about it. Some people don't understand how I would even consider changing anything, because there was always the chance that he might have to be somewhere else...however, now he'll most likely be in the middle east. I just can't get too excited planning my wedding when my only brother is going to be there. There's a possibility he'll be there for more than a year....I'm looking to find the exact time he'll be deployed...sometime at the beginning of the summer I think... This cuts back on the amount of time we have to save money (which the February wedding was quite helpful with as well :( ) , etc.
Does anybody have any tips, or has anybody had anything similar happen to them?
Thanks for any help you may have
mokie74m
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
I'm sorry, that's a really tough one. I don't have suggestions but my FH just got back in January from a year long deployment in Afghanistan so I know how tough it is trying to get an answer from the military. Would you be willing to move your date up or back?
WeddingGem
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
First of all I´m sorry that you have to go through that. It must be tough!! I´ve never been in a situation like that so I can only imagine how you must feel.
As for your date, I´m not sure how much you have saved or anything but it may be doable to bring it up closer. You may have to have it a little simpler than you originally wanted but sometimes when it´s not too far out you get amazing deals because people want to fill their empty spots.
I´m also sending you an FM.
PeterNina Mom
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
Posted by smashingsiren
My brother is a marine officer. As it stands right now, I've just found out that he'll definitely be deployed from the end of 2010 to the end of 2011. My wedding is February 19, 2011. I lucked out with the place and time and everything, and I was just starting to get really excited about it. Some people don't understand how I would even consider changing anything, because there was always the chance that he might have to be somewhere else...however, now he'll most likely be in the middle east. I just can't get too excited planning my wedding when my only brother is going to be there. There's a possibility he'll be there for more than a year....I'm looking to find the exact time he'll be deployed...sometime at the beginning of the summer I think... This cuts back on the amount of time we have to save money (which the February wedding was quite helpful with as well :( ) , etc.
Does anybody have any tips, or has anybody had anything similar happen to them?
Thanks for any help you may have
:
As the mother of an army Sgt who was deployed to Iraq for a year I know exactly how you feel. This is a very hard decision to make so why don't you talk to your brother and ask him how he feels about you going through with your wedding while he is overseas. I will say a prayer for both you and your brother. I truly hope he gets back home safe and sound. (I'm just hoping my son doesn't get sent for another tour). huggy:
Soon2BMrsDavidson
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
I wrote to u on the 2011 board
love82110
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
I completely uderstand the difference between 'well, he might be deployed' and then knowing that it is a definite. My best friend and one of my BM is in the military and we are in the same 'will she, or won't she' place. You have to decide what is best and what works for you. Like someone mentioned it may be worth checking in with RH's about openings about 6 months out. We got some amazing prices last month for Apr and May 2010. If you want to change it to so soon, and the RH hs openings, they will be very willing to work with you at this point. Good luck with a tough decision!
las1
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I am sorry this is a hard decision. How much do you have planned? Can you move up the date to fall 2010 before he leaves?
Soon2bMrsH
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Sorry you have to go through this!
i see your point and if i was in that situation i would consider moving our date sooner. i know it might be rough to plan it quickly, but it will be worth it knowing your brother can attend. Try calling some RH's and see if they have anything open for next year.
good luck and i hope everything works out for the best!
JAAMS
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
I'm really sorry that you're going through this
Can you maybe wait until he gets back?
springsandra
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
We actually picked our wedding date to plan around DH's BIL's deployment and vacation. SIL and I talked about it a while, and BIL was supposed to be here for the last two weeks in July, which would've been perfect. We planned everything around that.
Then they changed his leave to September.
So he wasn't able to be there. My father gave a really nice toast where the very first thing he did was praise BIL and what he's doing for all of us, which was really sweet. It didn't make up for his not being there, but we are here living our lives because of people like my BIL and your brother.
You should talk to your brother and see what he wants you to do. BIL would never have wanted us to change a thing on his account, so we went on with it, and it was the happiest day of our lives. We hung out with him in September when he was home on leave (he's back in Afghanistan now, and will be for at least another 6 months).
You can't stop your life because your brother has decided to serve the nation in this extremely honorable way, nor would I imagine he wants you to. But you have to do what works for you all. I wish you all the best with your planning.
queensbride2010
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
That is a really difficult situation. My FH wanted our date to be next July so that one of his GM would be back in time for the wedding. Good thing we did because he was supposed to be back in May, but his tour was extended. (Hopefully he will be back next month).
That being said, I would definitely talk to your brother about it. Really, you and FH have to decide what is best.
If you do decide to move the wedding up, you should definitely call up your vendors and ask if they would be willing to negotiate. You can look into a Thursday night wedding at your RH to cut the costs down or invite fewer people. It may be difficult to try to plan for when he returns because its hard to know if he will come back earlier or later.
I'll pray for your family.
luvly73
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
The best man, FH's cousin is supposed to get deployed to Afghanistan for 6 mos, from january to JUne. The wedding is June 19 so it's not a sure thing that he will be there...There is still a chance that he might not go though.
AND
My brother decided he wanted to join the Marines and was supposed to leave in January. He will be in job training in June and was planning to request the weekend off for the wedding...But that's not a sure thing either and while he thinks it won't be a problem, I know that it very well could be.
Now it seems he may not be going in because he can't get the job he wants so it's upsetting for him but relieving for me. I'm still not sure about either of them..With the way things are going in this country nothing is a sure thing
JessNicole7EM
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Re: Major Wedding Date Conflict
Posted by Soon2BMrsDavidson
I wrote to u on the 2011 board
me too.
Tetelove
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Sorry to hear this
Shellymd
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Ugh, I am so sorry to hear that. My husband is in the Marines so I totally understand. Is there any chance you would want to do get married now while he can be there and then have the big party when you originally planned. That way he is there to see you get married, and maybe he can be at the party also. If you think you will be bummed if hes not there, I would def plan to get married when he will be there. You don't want to feel like he is missing that day. Good luck with your decision and I wish your brother a quick and safe deployment.
