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Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

Original post by Brendanzgirl

Thread views: 1,049

My mother just insisted that she walk me down the aisle along with my father because /she raised me/... I said no and we had a bit of a fight
Some background info-->>
My parents got divorced when I was only 2, she remarried a terrible man whose children abused me (they were much older than me) I had a rocky relationship with her b/c she didn't help me out during the ages of 5-20!!! She recently divorced this person and we have tried to patch up our relationship but.... My sister got married while they were still together and my mother walked her with my father down the aisle. I never wanted that
perhaps b/c I don't feel like she should/deserves it...
Am I being really unreasonable?

Please Help any advice?

mtegay Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

Had the same issues as you did, it ******! in the end I pretty much was forced to have both of them walk me down the aisle b/c I really didn't want that to be an issue that led to ill feelings at the weddings. But you are right , it's totally the attitude that really put me off in the first place, as if it wasn't my choice to make.

Bellez95 Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

tell her you want the tradition. My mom and I are very very very close and i still wouldn't have her walk me down the aisle

CMaria81 Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

Why don't you offer your mom a reading? You can tell her that the reason you were so upset was because you really want to honor your father and you don't want to take away from his spotlight. You can site your sister's wedding as a time when your dad had to share the spotlight. Tell her you also think that she should have her very own place/position (as a reader) and not have to share one either.
If you concentrate on telling her how you want her to have her OWN thing and you want to honor her on HER OWN rather than on the negative (that you don't think she deserves it) You will probably be better off in getting what you want (which is her not walking you down the aisle). Lay it on as thick as you like, maybe even telling her that you always imagined she would be reading this poem/prayer/etc at your wedding as a child!

znycgirl Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

Posted by Bellez95

tell her you want the tradition. My mom and I are very very very close and i still wouldn't have her walk me down the aisle

I agree. I thought about it...but then had her & her brother walk down the aisle together...it was almost MORE perfect.

You can ALWAYS play the 'tradition' card.

FutureMrsCarrieri Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

I don't know your mother and I mean no disrespect but it sounds like she doesn't deserve such an honor. Tell her flat out that the answer is NO!!!!

sept08ihope Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

without reading everybody's comments or knowing more about your situation,,all i can say is that you do not want to be forced to do something you are not comfortable with...unfortunately weddings can create touchy situations just for the sake of appearences...that being said, unless you can be ok with her request, dont do it because it is YOUR day!!

jtgarsik Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

instead of bruising ur relationship with ur mom (especially since u've patched it up) - i would explain it to her without letting it turn into a fight. keep it short & sweet & simply say that it's traditional and in your heart you want to keep it that way and have your father walk you down. it's your wedding and that's what's in your heart and you dont want to fight about it, and you don't want her to be hurt. she can't argue with that - atleast i dont think she can!

jtgarsik Thread views: 1,049

Re: Mom wants to walk me down with Dad --HELP

Posted by Brendanzgirl

Thanks for the reply...

You know I feel like if she hadn't given me an attitude and demanded that she's walking me down the aisle I might have considered it...

I was even trying to find something special that she could do instead...like a Bible reading or something... But now I'm just mad that she felt like I owed it to her or something.

DONT not have her be a part of things because ur angry...because then after the wedding when ur spiteful feelings are gone u'll regret it. maybe u could have a dance with her at the reception?? i did this with my mom.