Ok- I must now accept defeat. The realestate market has done me in. My dad told us we should move back home!!!! I feel like a loser and a failure, but I just can't live with the animals above me. And at the rent I pay I WILL BE HERE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My dad is turning the basement into 'privacy area' but we have the full house. No one is ever home there, and the best part.......no more rent. We are giving ourselves 1 year, and thats it. Then getting a house. Just need more of a down payment, and its impossible to put a nice chunk of change in the bank paying $1615 a month in rent on one income.
I know a few of my friends who are doing it too. So I dont feel so bad. I feel like I'm going through the front door of the house I was in my whole life with my tail between my legs. UGH UGH UGH UGH. He swears if we follow is lead, we will be completely debt free in one year, including car payments.
Anyone else either live with parents, or want to or are debating it???? Need opinions. Regardless, I'm doing it. Its the best way to go, but hey, just want to see what others think!
Fran M
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
We are not in your situation. But I just wanted to say keep you eye on that goal of homeownership. A year will just fly by. Good Luck
ETA - I dont in any way see this as a negative
KCDC
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Thank you, thank you thnk you!!!
michele31
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
If you will have your own bedroom, which is very private and you give yourselves 1 year then I say it is okay. But I would insist on paying for electric and have my own phone as well as contribute say, maybe paying for the lawn service or something like that. I would not live totally rent free- that would not make me feel good about the decision.
Also- what about dinner time? Are you cooking for your husband and your parents? (or is it just your dad?) That might be hard without your own kitchen area. Maybe you can put a small kitchen downstairs so you and your husband have some privacy. If not, you will need to figure out how that will work out. I assume you will pay for your food and if you cook for dad for a year then that is also very nice, but it might get old never having an evening alone with DH.
I agree, the market here is unfair to young couples. Don't make this about defeat- use this opportunity and make the best of it.
KCDC
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Its just my dad and my brother. I have full intentions of doing everything. My dad works full time, from 4am til 5pm. And he spends a lot of time with his girlfriend. So I plan on cooking (hubby is a chef), so he plans on helping too. Unfortunately my old room is a computer/office now, so he's fixing the basement for us. Of course we will contribute. I could never do that to my dad, he's too good to us!
anna
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Dont take it as defeat. A parent helping one of his children out is nothing but admirable.
My father insists on helping us in the littlest ways, like carrying stuff to the car for us even if we can very well carry it ourselves. Its something about them feeling helpful and useful to us always. They dont want to feel or know that 'Im fine now without you'. It makes them feel good to help out in anyway way possible. Your dad is helping out in a major, selfless way. Many parents want to live their own lives and let their children worry about their own. I say you embrace your dad and all that he is offering to you. Im sure you are not taking it for granted and that you are doing as much as possible to show your appreciation, play your part, and get back on your feet in the process.
Applause for you girlie! Dont you dare feel one bit like you failed at anything. You succeeded in seeing what decision you needed to make, and I think you made the right decision.
I think dad deserves a nice dinner from the chef of the house as a toast to his generosity!
if you are comfortable in the house and privacy will be sacred...then I think its great for ONE year...
$2000/month for 1 year is $24,000!!!!
Danielle&Scott
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
I would say go for it...I wouldnt call it defeat. This is going to pay off in the long run. You are going to be able to save so much money in that year by living at home.
Danielle and I are going to be moving into my parents house, where I live now. I have the entire second floor to myself. So I have a living room, dining room, bedroom, computer room, and a bathroom. I do not have a kitchen, but I have some appliances upstairs. We are going to get a kitchen table for upstairs. So if we do cook downstairs then we can eat up stairs privately. We also have access to a washer and dryer downstairs. Just think of how much money you will be saving now since you do not have to go to the laundromat. I am assuming your fathers house has a washer, and dryer.
We are going to do this for 2 years at the max. We will be hoping to be out by then....My paretns were planning on moving, but are staying in the house for a few more years just for us....They are the best.
I think your dad is leading you in the right direction. He loves you and he wants you to be able to own your own home and not pay rent for the rest of your lives. You should be very happy that you have this opportunity.
I think you and your husband should set up a seperate bank account for your house and put all the money that you would pay for rent now, and all the other bills you would pay now into that account each month. This way you will know you are saving a certain amount of money each month and you can add to it what ever else money that you made.....
Good Luck....Keep your head up.
wacky
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Look if it will help you buy a home go for it. No need to feel bad.
AndrewsChick
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Andrew & I just got married last month and we are living in my parents basement. We have a bedroom, livingroom, bathroom and a sitting area, but NO kitchen (thats a hassle)....but, we will be able to save a lot by not paying high rents somewhere else. We hope to be here between 6 months to a year.
KCDC
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks to all of you guys for your comments. I feel so much better. I keep going over it in my head. But....my dad keeps telling us he's going to teach us to be penny pinchers, to the point that it will hurt. First off, he wants us to get rid of the cars and buy used (we have 2 brand new cars, we pay close to $800 in payments plus insurance). He's like 'you guys will have enough money for a great house by the time you leave here'. He's happy to have his granddaughter there too. He wants to retire (he's 51) and said he can't until he knows both his kids are financially set. So we are going to bust our ass to save and get out, so he can retire. He also offered to watch our daughter so I can go back to work on a part time basis. GOD ARE WE LUCKY to have him.
I thought I was the only one putting my tail between my legs and moving home to daddy, but the realestate market is just not good for first time buyers.
I think I may have some trouble breaking my lease though. We just called them this am and it aint gonna be easy. Anyone know of any tricks??? I need help.
Danielle&Scott
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Your dad is pretty smart...Thats what I did. I got rid of my CIVIC.....cause I was paying so much on the fianance and I bought a 2001 Chevy prizm, which is basically a toyota corolla. I am paying $135 a month now, thie civic was costing me over $230 a month.
Suzanne
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
If I didnt have the dogs, i would have done this MONTHS ago.. I have almost the same rent and its SO hard with rent, 2 car payments and the rest of the bills to save any darn money..
You will be so happy you did it this way.. Good luck!! youll probably be in your house way before me!!
ILT1221
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Your father sounds awesome. You are lucky to have a father who is so supportive and caring. You will save a lot of $ by living with him. As far as I see it you are in a win/win situation.
anna
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Again, your dad is awesome!
KCDC
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you all for your support. It's nice to see REAL people on here. I have to show these replies to my dad, he'd appreciate them!
I grew up in Commack, and I couldnt wait to get out when we got married, and then we joked about it when we couldnt afford to buy a house and get back in. So hey, at least I'm back in Commack (lol)
michele31
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
My only comment is that your father might take over a bit too much with your personal finances. It is one thing to make suggestions or give advice but to tell you to get rid of your cars etc..might make for a tense situation. I mean, are you and your husband okay with having your father dictact your spending/savings? Just a thought- you might want to still have some control over what you are doing as a couple with money. I personally would not get rid of both new cars. I would keep one new one, and get one, reliable used car. But that is just me.
I just thought I would put this out for you to consider.
sn00k4
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
We're kind of in that same situation. We expecting our first baby in January and we're currently living in the Bronx... but we absolutely HATE it here. We found a great condo in Middle Island, but we're not expecting too, too much... so we just want out of this horrible area (our window on our car just got smashed in Friday night) and it's just craziness around here this time of year.
So we figured that if we don't get this condo, we would move out to DH's parent's house in Saville, for just a couple of months until we find a condo or a co-op...
I really dreaded doing something like this, but sometimes you just have to appreciate all the help that your family will offer. Just think of it this way... It's not forever!!!
christy
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Best of luck. Save as much as you can and remember it is only a year. We spent our first 5 months married in a basement in my grandfathers house, so I totally understand. But you will have your own place one day.
kmcwed
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Re: MOVING BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!
Don't feel defeated! A lot of people move back home temporarily to get a down payment together.
A friend of mine has been renting a house for years, and they just can't get the $$ together for a down payment. They have one child and would love a second, but at this rate they will never get ahead of the game. I'm sure she wishes she could move back home for a year to get a jump start on things.
I think a lot of us do things we NEVER thought we'd do in the hopes that it will bring us closer to our own homes in the near future.
My sister and her husband moved back into my parents house with their baby for three months while they tried to save up some extra $$ for a house of their own. They crammed all their stuff, including the crib, into ONE bedroom!!
OMG!! It was a nightmare. But it got them their house!
So I think your case is not too unusual! We'll do whatever it takes to get those homes of our dreams!!
