Mr. & Mrs.

BMD'sPeanut Posted: May 18, 2004 12:31 PM

Mr. & Mrs.

Is it okay if I write:

Mr. & Mrs. M. Smith

on the outer mailing envelope (as opposed to writing out:

Mr. & Mrs. Michael Smith

and then on the inside envelope, I will write:

Michael & Diane

(for example)

BMD'sPeanut Posted: May 18, 2004 12:34 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

what about on the singles?

do i write:

Ms. J. Smith and Guest
or
Ms. Jennifer Smith and Guest?

on the outer envelope? or just:

Ms. J. Smith?
and then write guest on the inside...?

CaCRmr Posted: May 18, 2004 12:34 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I like how Michael looks on the outside envelope but as long as his name is on the inner envelope I can't see the big deal. It's your invitation. You write what you like

Kriss2c Posted: May 18, 2004 12:34 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I think you should write out the husband's first name.... especially if you are having a formal reception.

Traditionally, the wording on the invitation set the tone for the whole shindig.

CaCRmr Posted: May 18, 2004 12:35 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

On the outside envelope goes Guest, I believe!

Kriss2c Posted: May 18, 2004 12:36 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

As far as the and guest:

If Jennifer Smith has a long time significant other, I would write out his name as well. Otherwise, and guest is fine on both outer and inner envelopes.

BMD'sPeanut Posted: May 18, 2004 12:39 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Thanks!!!
Now this means I have to actually find out proper spellings of the mens names!

sammi102 Posted: May 18, 2004 12:39 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I think I would put the full name, not initial on the outer envelope as well as 'and Guest.'

nylisa Posted: May 18, 2004 12:45 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

It is your invitations and write it the way you want to write it. I am writing
Mr. & Mrs. Michael Smith
on the inner and outer envelope.

For those single people, I write
Mr. Michael Smith
on the outer and
Mr. Michael Smith
and
Guest
on the inner.

For those who had a very long SO, I write
Mr. Michael Smith
on the outer and
Mr. Michael Smith
and
Ms. Jane Doe
on the inner.

btrflygrl Posted: May 18, 2004 12:45 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

What I did:

Married Couples got Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
inner envelope got first names (ONLY if we were on a first name basis, if not it got Mr. and Mrs. Smith)

Singles w/guests:
Outer got Ms. Jennifer Smith
inner envelope got Jennifer and Guest

FeliciaDA Posted: May 18, 2004 12:47 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I just did my invites. I had these same issues when writing them out. And when you search online for the etiquette, there are different versions all over the place.

On the outside envelopes, we put 'Mr. and Mrs. John Smith,' as opposed to 'Mr. and Mrs. J Smith' We put Mr. and Mrs. Smith on the inner envelopes.

On the invites to singles, we put 'Mr. John Smith and Guest' . We put them on both inside and outside.

Of course AFTER doing all the 'and guest' invites, I saw that traditionally you aren't supposed to put 'and guest' on the outer envelope, just on the inside! Well after doing them all that way (we have a lot of single guests), I just left them the way they were.

laudipop Posted: May 18, 2004 12:49 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I'm personally offended by the practice of referring to women as 'Mrs. John Doe' as if they're just extensions of their husbands. So my mother will kill me, but I'm going to put 'John and Jane Doe' on the outer envelopes, then just their first names on the inner ones.

I've always heard that for singles, you put just their name on the outer envelope, then put 'Jane and Guest' or 'Jane and John' on the inner envelope.

tourist Posted: May 18, 2004 12:51 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I always hear that guest only goes on the inner, unless you aren't doing inner. I am writing out full first names.

There are few weird ones, that don't use their real names ( not even on chceks), I might use initials in those cases, but my mom said I should use their real names.

TwoBugs Posted: May 18, 2004 12:59 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Does anyone know of any good web sites that explain addressing etiquette? I have a few situations that I can't figure out what to do with...
(The outer-envelope-only invitations are really tricky!)

tourist Posted: May 18, 2004 01:03 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Posted by laudipop

I'm personally offended by the practice of referring to women as 'Mrs. John Doe' as if they're just extensions of their husbands. So my mother will kill me, but I'm going to put 'John and Jane Doe' on the outer envelopes, then just their first names on the inner ones.

my mom would agree with you. We didn't put their names on the invitations, but if we did, she wanted to be Maria & Douglas B_, not Mr. & Mrs. Douglas B__

so, I don't know what to do on the invitations. I may do it the mr & mrs way for most people & first names for my parents.

And what about place cards? Do they just mimic the inner envelope?

nsgraham Posted: May 18, 2004 01:33 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

I did Mr. Douglas and Mrs. Marcia B_ - that way you keep the formality, but you add the woman's name as well. I'm doing the place cards that way as well.

eogara Posted: May 18, 2004 01:37 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Posted by nsgraham

I did Mr. Douglas and Mrs. Marcia B_ - that way you keep the formality, but you add the woman's name as well. I'm doing the place cards that way as well.

This is what I plan on doing. I too hate when the woman's name is left out in favor of Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. Uh-uh, her name isn't John and I don't plan on losing my identity when I get married so I don't see why I would assume these women do. Mr. John and Mrs. Sally Doe.

LoriH Posted: May 18, 2004 02:05 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Posted by eogara

Posted by nsgraham

I did Mr. Douglas and Mrs. Marcia B_ - that way you keep the formality, but you add the woman's name as well. I'm doing the place cards that way as well.

This is what I plan on doing. I too hate when the woman's name is left out in favor of Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. Uh-uh, her name isn't John and I don't plan on losing my identity when I get married so I don't see why I would assume these women do. Mr. John and Mrs. Sally Doe.

I totally agree. It drives me crazy when people refer to a woman as Mrs. John Doe..

Leslie Posted: May 18, 2004 02:17 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

According to 'formal' etiquette - which I found on-line somewhere, here's how I'll address my invitations:

Married couple -

Outside Envelope: Mr. and Mrs. Clifford Smith

Inside Envelope: Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Married Couple - wife uses maiden name

Outside Envelope: Mr. Jack Allen
Ms. Jill Jones

Inside Envelope: Mr. Allen and Ms. Jones

Single with Guest -

Outside Envelope: Ms. (or Miss) Karen Johnson

Inside Envelope: Ms. (or Miss) Johnson and Guest

Married Couple w/ children -

Outside envelope: Mr. and Mrs. Jerry Brown

Inside envelope: Mr. and Mrs. Brown
Erin and Alyson

I believe that children over 18 receive their own invitation (can't recall the exact age for that?)

Also, this is the formal way of addressing invitations - the article I found stated that some brides aren't as formal....

Salason626 Posted: May 18, 2004 05:51 PM

Re: Mr. & Mrs.

Word of advice - its supposedly proper etiquette only to put (& Guest) on the inner envelope as well as the name of guests who dont live at that address. I did this - however, both of our brothers & another friend of mine all thought their longtime gfs/bf were not invited bc they didnt pay attention to the inner envelope. Sounds silly but even if its not 'proper', it'll save you a lot of headache to just put it on the outside envelope!