My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Original post by EJSD2006

Feb 11, 2006 08:58 PM

On top of all the drama I've had this week from my crazy BM, my FMIL told me today that she doesn't like my final giveaway and that we should get something different. I have 4 favors total...

1. little baskets that have our names and date on them that my uncle had custom made for each place setting
2. votive candles that say 'thank you for sharing our special day'
3. picture frame placecard holders
4. coasters that say 'LOVE'

FMIL doesn't like #4 and wants something bigger. Back to the drawing board. Any suggestions?

waterspout4 Posted: Feb 11, 2006 11:53 PM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Forget about what she thinks. I think 4 favors is a bit much, IMO. So what if she doesn't like 1? That means she likes 75% of them. How many people can say they have a 75% approval from their FMIL?

conigs25 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:01 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Heres my thoughts.........oh well for her

julybride06 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:10 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

OMG!!!! I am thinking about doing the same coasters!!! I have been asking my guests...cause I was a lil unsure if I wanted that...but everyone said that they need coasters and what a functional gift idea!

If you like it go for it....if she's not paying then do what you want..and if she wants bigger lt her pay for it!

NinaChris07 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:38 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Why do you have four favors?

Not trying to judge - I am just curious what your reasoning was....

Also, I would stick with the coasters, otherwise you are going to be VERY unhappy....

its not about the coasters....
It's not going to end at coasters.....

she is going to give her opinion on every aspect of your life if you let her!!!

choose to live your own life!!!!

wood2be Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:40 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

I think the coasters are adorable and if you like them, then use them! You already have a lot of favors, there is no need for something bigger. Stand your ground, it's your wedding! Besides If you give into her now, you're in for a long haul

sugarkube4 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:45 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

If she isn't paying for them, then she has NO say!! I happen to like the Love coasters.. I am thinking about the chrome bottle stoppers myself, but I like the Love coasters as well.. but wait.. WHY do you have so many favors?? Are you doing random favors on the tables?

darlene Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:47 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

I definitely understand the whole 'respect her opinion' issue with FMIL. Sometimes, you don't need to care what she says, but when it comes to wedding time I chose not to rock the boat either. She opposed our idea of coffee favors with the coffee scooper. So we chose another edible favor. If it really bothers you now, then maybe you can find a couple of favors that all of you can choose from and narrow down to the one you will give away.

EJSD2006 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 10:59 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Posted by darlene

I definitely understand the whole 'respect her opinion' issue with FMIL. Sometimes, you don't need to care what she says, but when it comes to wedding time I chose not to rock the boat either. She opposed our idea of coffee favors with the coffee scooper. So we chose another edible favor. If it really bothers you now, then maybe you can find a couple of favors that all of you can choose from and narrow down to the one you will give away.

thanks for understanding. i am going to go out with FMIL and FSIL on tuesday to find something else. it's not just my wedding, its FH's too and his family's opinion matters to me. please dont judge, ladies. i feel like i'm under alot of pressure with FH's family. they have very high expectations. at FH's cousins wedding they gave out this huge vases. so FH's mom just wants us to make sure we do something comparable. instead of 1 huge favor, i thought 3 or 4 small ones would be fine. and since 3 of the 4 will already be on the tables, i wanted something to hand out as everyone was leaving. and i'm under more pressure because he has another cousin getting married 3 months after us and i don't want the 'whispering' that our stuff wasn't good enough. it's very frustrating...

Shellycakes123 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 11:06 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

dont think 4 favors is too many considerin that 1 is te place card holder, one is a votive candle which most people put on the table anyway, and then the reg favor.

Calimali Posted: Feb 12, 2006 11:08 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

I love the coasters! I would love to get that as a favor, Its so useful! Dont even think twice about what other people say, If you and FH love it, go for it!

OctoberPrincess2006 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 11:46 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

I love the coasters, my friend at work is also using the same ones. If it is what you and your FH want then go for it!

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Feb 12, 2006 11:54 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

first of all, you are VERY generous to give away all those favors! Can I be invited to your wedding?

second, who cares what she says? it's not her wedding

I think if you love the coasters, go with them!

DUCKS2001 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 11:55 AM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

IF YOU BOTH LOVE THEM THAT IS WHAT MATTERS

DandS Posted: Feb 12, 2006 12:15 PM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Posted by wood2be

I think the coasters are adorable and if you like them, then use them! You already have a lot of favors, there is no need for something bigger. Stand your ground, it's your wedding! Besides If you give into her now, you're in for a long haul

Totally agree!

darlene Posted: Feb 12, 2006 12:15 PM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

OMG i totally understand the whispering thing...and the gossip that spreads in the family. I believe you and I are from the same 'background.' That may be it...lol...FLIP

Posted by alnem

Posted by darlene

I definitely understand the whole 'respect her opinion' issue with FMIL. Sometimes, you don't need to care what she says, but when it comes to wedding time I chose not to rock the boat either. She opposed our idea of coffee favors with the coffee scooper. So we chose another edible favor. If it really bothers you now, then maybe you can find a couple of favors that all of you can choose from and narrow down to the one you will give away.

thanks for understanding. i am going to go out with FMIL and FSIL on tuesday to find something else. it's not just my wedding, its FH's too and his family's opinion matters to me. please dont judge, ladies. i feel like i'm under alot of pressure with FH's family. they have very high expectations. at FH's cousins wedding they gave out this huge vases. so FH's mom just wants us to make sure we do something comparable. instead of 1 huge favor, i thought 3 or 4 small ones would be fine. and since 3 of the 4 will already be on the tables, i wanted something to hand out as everyone was leaving. and i'm under more pressure because he has another cousin getting married 3 months after us and i don't want the 'whispering' that our stuff wasn't good enough. it's very frustrating...

tbtmickey Posted: Feb 12, 2006 12:22 PM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

They are sooo nice...it's your wedding, and you're giving A LOT away...I think you should say thanks for your opinion but we 'LOVE' them!!!

B2BMay04 Posted: Feb 12, 2006 12:32 PM

Re: My FMIL just told me she doesn't like my favors

Why do you need to please your FMIL. Word of advice don't start the trend of changing things she doesn't like. You will be doing it forever.

Bottom line... your wedding, your choice.