My FSIL bought her dress for the wedding (she declined to be in the BP because she felt she is too old - 41). Anyway, the dress is NOT dressy enough! It looks like a sundress - sore of silky and flowy - literally something you'd wear to a BBQ. The wedding is on a Saturday night and it's black tie! Also, the material is very sumery and the wedding is in January! The dress is long to the floor. My gut tells me to just shut up and not say anything - I love her - she is just a little clueless about this stuff. Should I just leave it alone? I really don't want to hurt her feelings - she was really excited about it!
Valenia
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I think your gut is right on this one. I don't see any reason to say something if she isn't in the bridal party.
Olgaki
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I understand what you mean! You don't want her to show up at the wedding and feel all out of place! Maybe you could show her what some of your friends not in the BP will be wearing and she'll get the hint?? If she does - offer to go shopping with her and if she doesn't, maybe if you are on a shopping trip with her anyway you could find something and tell her this is exactly what I could see you wearing to my wedding?
MaryK
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I am LMBO - my FSIL is 54 and did NOT decline! If she's excited about it and not doing it intentionally, I would just let it be! (But that's me! )
EBM7
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
What is LMBO???
I thgink you guys are right - but I do like the suggestion of showing her what others are wearing...hmmm
ChristineC68
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I would only say something if you think she will feel out of place at the wedding.
IMO, I would rather know before hand that I am under or over dressed then feel awkward or uncomfortable at the event.
MaryK
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
Laughing my Butt off (I gave up cursing for Lent LOL!)
Fran M
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
let it go as the bride, you have enough to deal with already
HappyEverAfter
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My FSIL is doing the same thing, she is going to wear a dress that she wore to FHs brothers wedding 6 years ago. It is very outdated, with lace collar (wedding is in August) All she needs is a cameo and her hair in a bun and *poof* shes a librarian But, I figure, who cares, if thats what she wants to wear, whatever. I asked another FSIL to maybe take her shopping casually, not mentioning how out of place and outdated the current choice is. Hopefully they can find something else. I walk a fine line here, as FHs family is from upstate and are already intimidated by a NYC wedding, I dont want to sound snobby critiquing clothing choices
EBM7
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
HMICHIK - same EXACT thing - they are from CT (not Fairfield County - like the very rural part) and are very intimidated by the whole thing. They don't really get it and I think they think I'm snobby as is, so I'm definiely letting it go.
jennbaby
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
Just think you are the one everyone will be looking at
ddunne23
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Noone is going to care nor notice what she is wearing...you are the star of the day!
Scoop
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
Let her wear what she wants...you have enough things to worry about.
butterfly20
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
maybe you can nicely bring it up to her, or her mother. FSIL should not look less dressed than other guests.... You should offer to go out with her to the stores to try on dresses
kmcwed
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
Well, my opinion is to just let it go. She's not in the bridal party, so it won't affect your pictures or your color scheme. She chose the dress because she likes it and feels comfortable wearing it, so I would just let her be.
Everybody has different taste and it's hard to say what someone 'should' or 'shouldn't' wear (unless they're in the BP, naturally).
Think of it this way, there will probably be a few guests who don't like your choice of dresses for the BP, your color scheme, your flowers or even (gasp!) your dress. But that doesn't mean your choices were wrong or should have been changed. It just comes down to different strokes for different folks.
If she's uncomfortable at the wedding and feels under-dressed, it's HER problem. You've got enough to keep track of! Let it go.
Karen M
regina2
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I would leave it alone...
jtodaro
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
If i were you i wouldnt say a thing. she isnt in your BP so what does it matter. you cant tell people how to dress.
lulu
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
I wouldn't say anything about it. It's not worth hurting her feelings or getting into an arguement over.
Jess2
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Re: My FSIL's dress looks like she's going to a BBQ!
My FSIL will be 49. I haven't asked her yet (I know, I will, I will!) but I am assuming that she'll be in it. I am having everybody get their own dress and I am telling them to get black, this way even if it is not that formal it may look more so then if I picked a different color.
I would just let it be, she's not in your bridal party so it won't matter. If she feels funny then that is her problem, no one else will even notice.
