Need Advice....

My BM dresses came in a week ago and when they came in I emailed my 3 Bm's and also texted them letting them know I sent them an email. Since the girls are all from CT, I put in the email all the things they need for their fittings, the shoes they need and when they want to schedule a fitting appointment let me know so I can arrange to meet them at the PJ Ferry and take them to their fitting. 2 of the girls replied and said they are both free on the same day which works out perfectly. The 3rd BM has been the trouble one from the beginning. She wanted nothing to do with the planning or contributing to the shower and even told them back in the planning stages she won't come to the shower because it's her 'Family Day'. So at some point the other girls thought she had changed her mind but sure enough the invites went out and about 2 days after they were mailed she emailed my FMIL saying she won't be attending and with no explanation. Of course I'm not supposed to know any of this but my Fmil and other 2 bm's thought I should know. My trouble bm has also shown NO interest what so ever in ANY of my wedding planning or really anything going on with me. We have been friends for 22 years and she has always been a little selfish but it's out of control now in my opinion.

My question is, do I reach out to her yet again and ask her if she is free on the same day the other 2 girls are coming out or do I let it go and let her be responsible for her own actions? My shower is the week before the fitting day and I really have a feeling she and I are going to have a blow up because in my opinion there is no reason why she can't come to the shower.

Sorry for getting so wordy but I really don't know how to handle this one.

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Posted by Lilnessa

Id let her know about the fitting with the other girls and if she wanted to go to do so, otherwise to handle it on her own. I had issues with one of my BMs too. There is always one in the bunch!!!

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This. I didn't have my girls all go at the same time. That would be impossible. I let them handle all their stuff themselves so I didn't stress out about it. She's a grown woman and if in the end things don't work out you can always kick her out.

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Posted by e72071

I have a feeling it's going to come down to this. After the shower when I question her as to why she wasn't there I know I'm going get angry with her. I actually think I will only lose a bm from this but also a 22 year friendship. Sometimes I feel like I'm the wrong one in this situation but I don't think I'm asking that much of her.

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You have every right to be angry!