So one of my good friends married this idiot. he was an idiot before they got married and still remains one. (she thinks he is wonderful.. does not wrong..etc..)
he is also a crazzyyyy alcoholic. (which she is well aware of) sunday i had an e-party at my house for my friends. he made such an *** of himself. he stuck his head in my pool everyone was looking. then he was starting fights with FH's friend. it got to the point where FH had to pretend he was leaving just to get him to leave. and when they finally do leave he calls my cell and is like do you have any beer or food we can take home?
i was like no! so now im torn about inviting them to the wedding. i have already made the decision to not ask her to be one of my bridesmaid... simply becuase i didnt want to deal with the drama. hes also really possessive and accuses people of hitting on his wife all the time. (yea my 37 year old married BIL with 3 kids is hitting on ur wife.... w.t.f )
so this is part vent/ part i need some advice... do i not invite them to the wedding? i cant just invite her...
Jenna_and_John
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I would not want someone like that at my wedding. If you're comfortable not inviting them then I think you should follow your gut and not.
mrsdraskin2009
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I would tell her in no uncertain terms that unless he shapes up, your friendship is in jeaopardy and they will not be invited to the wedding!
blessed18
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oh i am in the same boat like you...i dont like my friend's boyfriend at all total jerk...is it bad if when the time comes around to send the invitations i just address it to her even though they are living together? i dont want him at my wedding.
RackyMo21
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i know for sure that if i dont invite her it will end the friendship. but on the other hand i cannot invite just her... espcially since she thinks its everyone else and not him.
i have a some time to decide... im just upset about his scene sunday at my party. i will not accept a scene like that at my wedding nor will fh or our families..
FutureMrsSoltan
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I would not want him there at all. I would tell your friend this is my special day and I dont want what happened at the e-party to happen at my wedding.
Nichole2010
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I dont think I would want him there...if he cant even act decent at your party, how can he be expected to act decent at your wedding?! especially if he is an alcoholic and there are MORE people there and ESPECIALLY if there is an open bar?! I think it would be a bad idea for him to be there...
and if your friend is a good friend, she needs to understand that you dont want her husband ruining your one special day.
MrsSoto
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well, if you dont invite them, this will most likely end your friendship, right? and if you only invite her, jus say, what would happen then...would this also end your friendship or could you possibly at all say, listen, i dont want to do this but im not going to not invite you because you are my good friend but i cant have your husband there, etc.
Im sure she wouldnt come and be upset but maybe she would think enough that you atleast you did want her there, rather than not inviting her at all. im sorry, its a tough one!
jcreilly
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Honstley after the e-party i would not invite them, try to talking with her and tell her your concern for her because you dont wanna loss her friendship, but is afraid after the way he acted at your party you dont want him at the wedding!!
kris_gets_hitched
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After that kind of behavior at the e-party, I wouldn't invite them. Your wedding is a year away. He probably won't change, but in any event you won't be mailing out invites for like another ten months. If you're planning to send out STD's, don't send them one, this way they won't be expecting an invite. If he shapes up over the next ten months, then invite them. If he doesn't, then don't. If you don't invite them, it will more than likely end your friendship with her. I'm in a VERY similar situation and have come to terms with the fact that my decision not to invite a certain friend and her @sshole boyfriend will probably end the friendship. It wasn't easy, but it is what it is. (This was after some heart-to-heart conversations with her...when he'd ALLOW that to happen )
JillandJoe
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i say no, im on this kick where i want to be drama free and am not inviting people I know who are like this douche-bag that you write about... skip it, she has to understand that she chose to marry him and that means she has to deal with the consewuences of his actions
M_Berk-Glenn
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Posted by kris_gets_hitched
After that kind of behavior at the e-party, I wouldn't invite them. Your wedding is a year away. He probably won't change, but in any event you won't be mailing out invites for like another ten months. If you're planning to send out STD's, don't send them one, this way they won't be expecting an invite. If he shapes up over the next ten months, then invite them. If he doesn't, then don't. If you don't invite them, it will more than likely end your friendship with her. I'm in a VERY similar situation and have come to terms with the fact that my decision not to invite a certain friend and her @sshole boyfriend will probably end the friendship. It wasn't easy, but it is what it is. (This was after some heart-to-heart conversations with her...when he'd ALLOW that to happen )
ITA....save yourself the DRAMA its your day
grkbarbie
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just phase them out.. dont hang out with them anymore.. by the time ur wedding comes.. hopefully u wont knwo them anymore..to the point where theyll be annoyed. its the only diplomatic way i can think of doing it without her hating u lololl
i plan on doign that with a few ppl :-x
megan_gallagher
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Posted by grkbarbie
just phase them out.. dont hang out with them anymore.. by the time ur wedding comes.. hopefully u wont knwo them anymore..to the point where theyll be annoyed. its the only diplomatic way i can think of doing it without her hating u lololl
i plan on doign that with a few ppl :-x
ITA! if she calls you.. don't answer, if she emails you.. don't respond. wait a while- if she gets soo 'WHAT'S WRONG' just say 'I'm hurt over the e-party.. I need time'
from there she'll either get mad or realize that her husband is a complete azzhole and maybe she'll offer a solution.
iHeartMoogle
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I'm sorry this happened. You have to realize they're a family now and it's impossible to talk about someone's family without them getting upset. Maybe you should talk to her about getting him help for his drinking problem. Hopefully he'll start AA and not be drinking by the time your wedding rolls around! I know it's wishful thinking, but it will benefit everyone if it happens!
runnerbride1023
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I think you need to call your friend and be honest with her. Tell her that her husband made such a scene at your e-party and he can not act that way at your wedding. It is very different when a friend is out of control at a laid-back event, vs an upscale wedding. Maybe if you point out other situations when he has done this in the past, she will realize she either needs to help him shape up.
regardless she is going to be upset/mad at you/hurt so you should try to be as honest as you can.
