Okay so to make a long story short. FH family is not very close. FH is not too close to h is mother, nice womend but very self centered and inconsiderate. We keep our distance. Well, about 3 months ago she talks about what color dress she wants, she was thinking green or blue. Two months ago I tell her my mom bought her dress and it Blush. Keep in mind she spoke with my mom 3 weeks okay, I am guessing about shower plans. Last week she tells me she is going dress shopping iwth a freind of hers, i say great thats so exciting call me and let me know how you made out. No call, until yesterday FH sister calls him and tells him mommy bought a dress. Oh okay great, well he calls his mom, and she proceedes to tell him about her great dress......BLUSH. Its the same color as my moms. she claims she did not know. But FH and I both know that my mom spoke to her and told her as did I. She tells FH oh i was going to call her and tell her all about it but ive been so busy, and oh i couldnt find a dress in green so i went witht his one. What am I supposed to do. I am seeing the dress on Sunday. I just dont think its fair, and I am more annoyed that she lied and told Fh she sisnt know.
imas98
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She has time I would tell her she needs to change it !!! I don't understand people !
TNT
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Thats what I am leaning towrads. Her own duaghter thinks she should change it.
SusiBtoM
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Tell her to change the color fo her dress. MOB gets first pick at the style and color. Blush could be two different shades of the same color, but would still be too similar. Way different from blue or green. Maybe offer to go shopping with her, to be nice ?
army wife to be
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def tell her to change it. even go dress shopping with her if u need to.
Pencils
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That's sooo passive aggressive. She knew she could have any color but blush and that's what she chose? Well, she's going to have to change it. No arguments. Just be firm. Maybe the dress she chose comes in another color.
AMGBride2008
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Wait to see the dress first before saying anything... what's blush to her might be red to everyone else. If the color is the same than politely tell her that you'd really appreciate it if she found something else... you want both of the moms to stand out... offer to go with her.
robinandjoe
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Wow, almost the same thing happened to me. I agree that it is very passive aggressive. I have been dealing with that type of behavior ever since FH and I moved in together. My mom loves her dress and doesn't want to change it, and FMIL loves hers, and doesn't think there is anything wrong with wearing the same color as my mom...she thinks they'll 'match'. At this point I am over it, and know that they will not be standing side by side that day! At least you have FSIL on your side! That may convince her to change it. MY FSIL was the one who pushed FMIL to buy her dress! AND.....the store said it would be in within two weeks of ordering, and she still ordered it without checking with me or my mom, even though there were 5 months to the wedding! The nerve of some FMIL's!!
tricia3381
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maybe u can have FSIL talk her into changing it.
PattyK
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I would suggest that she get a different color dress. She has plenty of time to get another dress.
babylon bride
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Posted by AMGBride2008
Wait to see the dress first before saying anything... what's blush to her might be red to everyone else. If the color is the same than politely tell her that you'd really appreciate it if she found something else... you want both of the moms to stand out... offer to go with her.
I agree with this post. See what the dress looks like first before you get too crazy. If she refuses to find another dress and this is what she wants...is it really worth getting all upset about? Yes, it stinks but I'm more a keep the peace kind of person. I analyze everything in the sense of 'is this worth me getting upset over?' You said yourself that she is not close to FH and you. So ignore it. Believe me NOONE but you is going to think 'oh my god they wore similar colors'
JMO
TNT
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Thanks girls, I couldnt wait to come on here and get all your feedback. I wasnt sure if it was just me. I am going to wait to see it on Sunday, how knows maybe she will change it before Sunday, once fsil talks to her.
If not I am just going to mention that I would of really liked them in two diff colors, i have five days to prepare what I am going to say. Fh thinks I should flat out tell her to buy another one. I will keep you updated, Thanks agian.
AlliCatB
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I would call the store where she bought the gown to see if it comes in other colors, and if they've ordered one for her yet.
As a caveat: people fascinate me. I cannot imagine doing such a thing. And I feel like I've been saying that a lot lately with this wedding stuff.
Aug07OFCbride
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Lt blue is our main color. my FMIL got a light blue dress and I hope my mom finds a light blue dress too (I think thats what shes looking for), so everything blends well.
But if you are adamant about them not wearing the same color, I can see why youre frustrated. Just not sure what you can really do at this pt...you cant tell her she cant wear it, ya know?
diva7531
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Posted by TNT
Thanks girls, I couldnt wait to come on here and get all your feedback. I wasnt sure if it was just me. I am going to wait to see it on Sunday, how knows maybe she will change it before Sunday, once fsil talks to her.
If not I am just going to mention that I would of really liked them in two diff colors, i have five days to prepare what I am going to say. Fh thinks I should flat out tell her to buy another one. I will keep you updated, Thanks agian.
I hope it all works out the only part I would change if need be is tell FH HE should tell his mom to change it, not worth it for you to get involved.
thelastresort
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Posted by AMGBride2008
Wait to see the dress first before saying anything... what's blush to her might be red to everyone else. If the color is the same than politely tell her that you'd really appreciate it if she found something else... you want both of the moms to stand out... offer to go with her.
I agree with this. That is so ridiculous that she would do that though.
