I'm trying to decide whether or not I invite my 'friend' to my engagement party and possibly wedding
Here is the story.. I'll try to make it short.
We had been best friends since 2nd grade. Her parents were always my second family. Always very close up until the last 4 years or so. We never had a fight, we sort of just went our separate ways. We hardly ever speak and I never see her family anymore. She was very religious and I think it messed her up in someways. She became a little rebelious and became a very different person. When I have spoken to her I would ask if she was dating anyone (in small talk) and she wouldn't even tell me. I feel like everything is a secret with her.
When I am around her she gets to me..
So do I invite her to my engagement party? Do I invite her parents?
What would you do?
lisad117
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Re: do I invite...
I don't think I would invite her and her family unless you wanted to rekindle the friendship. I invited a couple of old friends to my wedding and now that it is over I realize that I probably shouldn't have because we still never see each other. In the end follow your heart. If you really want them there go ahead but don't do it if you are because you feel like its the 'right' thing to do.
ewickens
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Re: NEED HELP do I invite...
I don't think you should invite her or the family to the e-party.
If things change over course of time b4 the wedding, you can always invite them to the wedding, but in the current situation, I wouldn't invite them.
Michy
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Re: NEED HELP do I invite...
I would say no just b/c you say you are not close and when you are around her she gets to you. You don't want to have someone at your wedding that bothers you.
snydl40
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Definetly not the E-party, possibly the wedding-you still have a little time to decide.
mrsh2b
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Re: NEED HELP do I invite...
Exactly what the others said...if you invite her to the e-party, you are stuck inviting her to the wedding. Hold out until then.
Katie&Chris2006
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I wouldn't. You can reassess for the wedding, but if you invite to the e-party, you really have to invite her to the wedding, regardless of what transpires from now until then.
I had a similar situation to yours. I was best friends with a girl since 2nd grade, but started to feel like a friend of convenience to her over the last 5 years or so. I was her MOH (and in retrospect I think I was it just because she had no one else) and after the wedding she dropped me like a bad habit. We kept in touch every so often via IM and email, but things were just never the same. When I got engaged, I let her know...kind of putting the ball in her court to see if she would be excited for me, etc. I haven't heard from her since, nor has her family kept in touch with mine (they were also very close) Occassionally I get really sad when I think about this friend...my oldest friend...and not having her by my side on the big day. But I know that I have an amazing group of TRUE friends who will be there..and wouldn't miss it for the world. Best wishes...I know how you feel!
jgl
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Re: NEED HELP do I invite...
THank you Girls
and Thank you Katie&Chris!!
I haven't even called to let her know that we are engaged. I think I am afraid that she won't really care. I've noticed over the years that when i brought up FH she doesn't seem too interested. She has sort of isolated herself from all the people we were friends with. So i guess I can't feel too bad that it was just me.
I get sad too. It is really a shame that friends who were so close for so long can just drift apart. I find that happens with woman and i hate it. that is probably why I have more male friends.
DanNette
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Re: NEED HELP do I invite...
No, you don't have to. It seems like a normal case of just losing touch. If you won't normally run into her or see her often, I don't think you need to.
