so to make a really long story short my mother and i never really see eye to eye but thats becuase we both want things to be our way or the hwy. so today she said something that made me upset which then started a whole huge fight ending in tears on both sides and now we're not speaking.
But what came out in the mix of things was that shes upset that i dont include her in my wedding planning. but im not sure what shes 'supposed' to be included in . i dont want her to feel like im taking her along cuz i want her to pay since FH and i are paying for everything ourselves.
as far as dress shopping and stuff like that shes always working she works 2 jobs and its hard to get time off at together so i would go with my BMs and then if i found soemthign i liked i took her back to check it out and that apparently just isnt good enough.
so my ? 's are WHAT DO I DO??? i thought i was doing the right thing by not bringing her cuz i didnt want her to feel bad that she cant help pay. and What else am i supposed to be including her in??
PLEASE HELP!!!
thanks in advance!
dream426
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
I bring my mom everywhere when I book a vendor or anything wedding related. She is probably more with me than FH is...lol I am paying for all of the vendors but I still bring her. I don't think she feels like she has to pay if I bring her. We have an agreement and we talked that she will pay for the RH and I will pay for the vendors.
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
see i would bring my mom with me everywhere if FH wasnt going but its usually just me and FH cuz he wants to be involved and when were off shes not around its not like im purposely nothing inviting her shes just never around nor showed any interest to come with me and whenever i say i want to do something wedding related she always tells me im too early and have pleanty of time.
i dont know im starting to feel guilty
dream426
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
Yeah thats hard. What if you go with FH and then take her later when you both have time? This way you and FH are still doing it together but you mom will feel involved.
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
thats what i have been doing and its coming out now that shes upset with me for doing that!
i didnt buy my dress with out her.. i went with my MOH and BM pick out our favs. then brought her back with me... same for BMs dresses, the halls, the flowers, the Photos. so im not sure what else i can do?
dream426
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
Yeah my mom was like that with my dress. I went with my MOH and she came running when I found my dress that day. But she was upset that she wasn't there from the beginning. Maybe you guys can work out a schedule or something where she can come and you have time. It is a hard situation. I know you aren't talking right now but when you do maybe there is something you can set up. I am sorry I am no help.
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
no you are i really appreciate it! she just has made me feel like the worst daughter alive when she has said some very hurtful things to me 'to prove a point'
then pulls the ' when you have a daughter and she does this to you, you'll understand' card
dream426
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I totally understand. Mothers have a way to get you upset. You always say hurtful things that you can't take back. I would be upset also if I were you.
Mrs. V 2008
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wow im sorry megan thats tough..i would definately sit down and explain everything honestly to your mom...i hope you work things out
Soon2BMrsD
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Posted by Bride 2 Be
wow im sorry megan thats tough..i would definately sit down and explain everything honestly to your mom...i hope you work things out
thanks im trying! but every time i try and talk to her she gets mad and walks away from me!
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: Need some advice ASAP!
Posted by Soon2BMrsD
Posted by Bride 2 Be
wow im sorry megan thats tough..i would definately sit down and explain everything honestly to your mom...i hope you work things out
thanks im trying! but every time i try and talk to her she gets mad and walks away from me!
i would leave it alone for now..let her cool down and they maybe try to talk tomorrow..when shes upset it won't matter what you say..my moms the same way!! good luck!
