Not sure if you ladies remember but about 2 months ago I went with my girls to look at bridesmaid dresses. About 3 days before we went one of my bm's dropped out. she told me she didn't have any money and couldn't afford to pay for the dress even in installments. I wasn't mean I totally understood and left it alone.
Well....I haven't spoken to my Bm(my cousin) since then. Saturday night she started sending me crazy text messages at 1am. The 1st few were about this girl that we both know saying she saw her with a mohawk and that she has a girlfriend. Ok...thanks....but why do I need to know this random info at 1am??!! Then she sent me a text saying she loves me and want to see me. Then at 2:30 am she called me and left me a voice message saying 'Anna I love you soooo much and I really really want to talk to you.'
I haven't called her back because I'm afraid she might say she wants to be in the bridal party again. I really can't rely on her and am afraid to say sure you can be party of the bridal party and then have her back out a few months before.
So what should I do? FH says I should call her and just say I'm sorry but when you dropped out I asked someone else to take your spot.
What would you do? Should I even calll her back or wait for her to call me? I figured she was propably drunk dailing!!!
TIA
tdebe
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Re: Need some help
I would definitely call her. Even if she can no longer be part of your bridal party, it's better to smoothe things over now. I would consider letting her back in if you think she's really sorry, don't believe that she'll back out again and if you guys are really close. People make mistakes, and some deserve second chances and if she does, give her one. However, if she's an immature girl making a drunken phone call, call her anyway just so that things are taken care of sooner rather than later.
ILOVEBRIAN2008
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its sounds like to me it was def drunk dialing..i mean why else would it be at 1am? but i would def call her today and ask her whats up...then just be honest 'i really wanted u to be in it but after you dropped out i asked someone else in your place'
femmes
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maybe it was a drunk dial, and there is no reason why you two shouldnt talk. For me personally if someone backed out as a bridesmaid i wouldnt reconsider...i hope it things work out!
dream426
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I would call her because it is just going to bother you. If you call and get it over with you won't have to stress about it. I would also just tell her that you are sorry but you asked someone else to be in it after she said she couldn't be in it. There is nothing wrong with that. She can't expect you to wait for her to decide.
bemyyoko
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I would totally call her. Sounds like drunk dialing but who cares? You cared about her enough to ask her to be in your bridal party so I think it's a good time to start talking again. If she wants to be in your bridal party I'd say no BUT i wouldnt tell her that you asked someone else to take her place. I'm not very comfortable with the idea of replacing people in general. You should ask who you want to ask regaurdless of the number. My best friend cant make it to the wedding but i'd never tell her that i picked someone else to take HER place.
Just explain that things are kinda set now and with all the stress and everything involved in wedding planning you'd rather she just attend as a guest and what not.
jteach711
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Anna, I would call your cousin and see what she has to say, maybe she doesn't even want to be back in, maybe she just feels bad that you haven't spoken. If she does bring it up I would just explain that other arrangements have already been made and you can't make any changes now but maybe you could find something else for her to feel like she is part of the wedding, a reading, or something like that. Good luck, let us know how it goes
Princess Cut Bride
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Ladies thanks for the advice. I didn't really replace her. I always wanted her to be in it but we didn't have a guy. When I go to Italy this summer in July I was going to ask one of my guy cousin's to be her partner. So when she backed out in April I was kind of relieved that I hadn't asked my cousin in Italy yet. I'm not mad at her for what she did I was just a little upset...because her mom could have lent her the money for the deposit which the woman said could have even been $50. So if she really wanted to be in it in april she would have made an effort.
Thanks for the advice...and I will keep you all updated once I speak to her.
Snowflake08
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even if she was drunk dialing she is your cousin and u need to talk to her
Princess Cut Bride
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Posted by Snowflake08
even if she was drunk dialing she is your cousin and u need to talk to her
I never said I wasn't going to talk to her. We didn't leave off badly...I told her I understood her position completely and thanked her for telling me up front and not waiting to tell me.
GinaBambina08
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Posted by Princess Cut Bride
Posted by Snowflake08
even if she was drunk dialing she is your cousin and u need to talk to her
I never said I wasn't going to talk to her. We didn't leave off badly...I told her I understood her position completely and thanked her for telling me up front and not waiting to tell me.
Yeah, you should definitely call, and if you don't want her to be in it, I think you should definitely take FH's advice and say that you already got someone else to replace her when she dropped out..
sassygirl9
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Hey anna, def. sounds like drunk dialing.
I would call her. Maybe she just feels bad for dropping out. You never know
If she does ask to be apart of the BP tell her she was replaced and can't switch anymore, but you'd love for her to do a reading during the ceremony. This way she still feels included.
