Need some help from my 06 girls!!!!

Is eloping a consideration? It sounds romantic to me, and then you get to celebrate next year.

Well we are kinda eloping... however instead of us just running away and doing it alone...FMIL and my parents will be there...

everythings kinda set in stone... the rings are already engraved...the marriage certificate is alread filed... the JOP is already booked...

Im completly happy with the way we are doing things...dont get me wrong... it was my idea (along with Fh of course) but FMIL is making it sound like we are into it and we are gonna regard not making this a big deal...blah blah blah...

I dont feel that way because to me... we are still celbrating in a BIG way later on...

To me its important to have the rings on our fingers...to have the same last name and be a family when our son is born... it is also important to have my dream wedding...but next year...no need to make a big deal out of both weddings??!!!

There's no reason to make a big deal of both if you and FH don't want to. Honestly, it couldn't hurt either way though, you will both decide what day you will celebrate as your wedding day.

I'm so excited for you Marissa...baby Ryan will be our first 06 baby

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Posted by Princessmaris

OK-to give those who dont already know a quick background...4 months after I got engaged (and booked my wedding) I found out I got pg. even though I was on the pill

FH and I(along with out families) were overjoyed, even though our timing was way off...

Baby Ryan is due this october, while my wedding was booked for October of 06', for bad timing it kinda works out for us.. I still get to have my dream wedding and so forth...

A few months ago we ran into an insurance issue and decided we had to get married before the baby was born..at first it was just gonna be a legal mumbo jumbo..but as time grew on and my hormones began going crazy...it was now important to have his last name and be a family...


We decdied to get married in the town hall on 7/22/05 (wedding rings and all) and then get married in the eyes of god..followed by my fairy tale reception as planned 10/27/06... (Ryan and Marissa 7/22/05 celebrated on 10/27/06)

My question is Fh and I arent really making a big deal out of this... FMIL wants to make all these plans and have flowers and all this crap and him and I just arent into it... She wants us to take pictures and remember this day for no matter what our marriage certificate will always say 7/22/05....

Im happy we are getting married and Im happy with the decision we made to do things this way...but this is not the day I will remember as my wedding day...these are not the 'wedding pictures' im gonna hang in my house!

We kinda wish it was just me and him...no one else, but those who have heard stories about FMIL know that could never happen!!

Are we wrong... should we be making a bigger deal out of this... We are very focused on the arrival of our son...plus we just moved in together...so many things happening at once...are we blowing this off????

TIA

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Oh darling I TOTALLY understand you! You should talk to you FMIL and let her know that since you have a baby on the way, you really dont want the extra headache of having to worry about all these extras and would like an intimate wedding...you want to focus on the baby now. By the way CONGRATULATIONS on becoming a mommy soon...you must be thrilled !!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by serendipity0680

It's your day, and it should be the way you and your Fh want it to be.

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I totally agree....it is your day and in a situation like this you should do it however you want. My parents got married at the Justice of the Peace and then had a ceremony and reception months later that everyone was involved in...they celebrate the 1st day privately (dinner, or whatever) and we all recognize the 2nd date and their anniversary.

My sister was in the same boat-She had a wedding planned for june 05 and she also found out she had a baby on the way- They got married on 9/11/05 and we just went out to lunch after the JOP ceremony and it was nice-talk to FMIL she has no choice but to understand-it's all about you two! Good luck and don't stress

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Posted by gNi1125

There's no reason to make a big deal of both if you and FH don't want to. Honestly, it couldn't hurt either way though, you will both decide what day you will celebrate as your wedding day.

I'm so excited for you Marissa...baby Ryan will be our first 06 baby

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Awww thanks so much!!!!

I just wanna make sure that Im not neglecting this wedding...I dont think I am...but ya never know!

you are the second person i know to have this story. my girlfriend also found out about her son after she was engaged - got married in city hall for insurance reasons - also had a big wedding after her pregnancy was over - and i do not want to be the bearer of bad news - but the girl was trying to do so much at the time- she was tired and stressed and her son was born underweight as a result.

I think you are absolutely correct in focusing on your baby, your health, and your FH. That IS the most important thing right now.

do not let your MIL stress you out. if you do not want a big deal made about the 22nd - you have 2 options - tell her - or simply just go along with it. I am unsure of MIL's motive in all this - but if it bothers you that much - i think your FH should have a chit chat with his mom and tell her to chill out - i would not put yourself in the middle. I think it would mean more to her if it comes directly from her son.

so to answer your question - no i don't think you need to make a bigger deal out of this than you want to. If the 22nd is no more to you than a day to have your insurance straightened out - than that is all it has to mean to you.

good luck with your pregnancy - and your MIL.