NEED TO VENT.....( regarding my guests)

Now I know that every bride can relate to this, some more than others. My RSVP deadline was June 6, and I still have a good amount of people who haven't responded, but I was prepared to make those phone calls. I was not prepared for the guest who would add more people to their response cards without at least calling me and asking. How could someone invite another person to a wedding that was not originally invitation. I am soooo MAD I could scream.

What gives the person the right to add people to response cards? I am so taken aback I don't know what to do. I plan on calling these quests and asking them to stick with the names on the invites but I might end up saying some not so nice things.

what is the best way to approach this without offending my guest? HELP Ladies!!!!

First off....as hard as this is.....stay calm.
These people just have NO CLUE!!!

Now without getting heated simply say
Im just calling to confirm your rsvp for you and 'significant other'. I also noticed that 'so and so' was listed on the card. Unfortunately

(Pick One)

our budget restricts us from inviting everyone we would like to see there

we'd like to keep our reception as intimate as possible and ask that only our dearest friends and family attend

we are paying for the wedding ourselves and can only have a certain amount of guests attend

Good luck and I hope everything works out!

I wouldn't worry about offending them YOU are the one that should be offended when they blantantly disregarded the etiquette of an invitation.

This gets me crazy... ATTENTION ALL GUESTS OUR WEDDINGS ARE NOT FR!@#$NG BARBECUES, you can't bring WHOMEVER YOU WANT!!!!!

What is wrong with people today? I swear I want to buy TV airtime and run commercials about this.

I wouldn't even apologize... 'We received your response card to our wedding and there appears to be a mistake, only Bob and/or Mary were invited, as it says on the inner envelope of the invitatioon and I see you want to bring Jim. Due to reasons of guest list size and space limitations, Jim cannot attend.'

As my grandma would say...

some of these people, 'need a good swift kick in the rear'.

You are right... stick to your guns!!!

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Posted by Soon2BMrsWilliams

Now I know that every bride can relate to this, some more than others. My RSVP deadline was June 6, and I still have a good amount of people who haven't responded, but I was prepared to make those phone calls. I was not prepared for the guest who would add more people to their response cards without at least calling me and asking. How could someone invite another person to a wedding that was not originally invitation. I am soooo MAD I could scream.

What gives the person the right to add people to response cards? I am so taken aback I don't know what to do. I plan on calling these quests and asking them to stick with the names on the invites but I might end up saying some not so nice things.

what is the best way to approach this without offending my guest? HELP Ladies!!!!

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So far on 3 of my RSVP's my guests have added another person who was not on the invite. I expected this to happen since I had read so many posts from other LIW brides who went through this. What I have done is assigned this job to one of my bridesmaids to make the calls. She has a phone list and for those that add a person...she will say something on the order of 'my name is ... and I am apart of Latrice's bridal party. Latrice has asked me to call and thank you for responding to the invite. However, the guest list is very tight and, unfortunately, you will not be able to bring .... that you mentioned on your RSVP to the wedding. If that is a problem, please let me know so that I can update Latrice. Latrice really wants you to come but will understand if you can not make it if ..... is not i nvited. Thank you.

And thats it. I refuse to call people after I took my time to send out all of those invites. Utilize your BM's ladies...thats what they are for.

Good luck. But it is frustrating. But if I were to call, it would not come out as nice. It may sound rude so a BM is better for the job.

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Posted by Latrice

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Posted by Soon2BMrsWilliams

Now I know that every bride can relate to this, some more than others. My RSVP deadline was June 6, and I still have a good amount of people who haven't responded, but I was prepared to make those phone calls. I was not prepared for the guest who would add more people to their response cards without at least calling me and asking. How could someone invite another person to a wedding that was not originally invitation. I am soooo MAD I could scream.

What gives the person the right to add people to response cards? I am so taken aback I don't know what to do. I plan on calling these quests and asking them to stick with the names on the invites but I might end up saying some not so nice things.

what is the best way to approach this without offending my guest? HELP Ladies!!!!

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So far on 3 of my RSVP's my guests have added another person who was not on the invite. I expected this to happen since I had read so many posts from other LIW brides who went through this. What I have done is assigned this job to one of my bridesmaids to make the calls. She has a phone list and for those that add a person...she will say something on the order of 'my name is ... and I am apart of Latrice's bridal party. Latrice has asked me to call and thank you for responding to the invite. However, the guest list is very tight and, unfortunately, you will not be able to bring .... that you mentioned on your RSVP to the wedding. If that is a problem, please let me know so that I can update Latrice. Latrice really wants you to come but will understand if you can not make it if ..... is not i nvited. Thank you.

And thats it. I refuse to call people after I took my time to send out all of those invites. Utilize your BM's ladies...thats what they are for.

Good luck. But it is frustrating. But if I were to call, it would not come out as nice. It may sound rude so a BM is better for the job.

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We are preparing for this too after reading LIW posts. FI wants to put 'Reserved Seating Only' but we compromised and came up with this for our RSVP:

We look forward to celebrating with you!

____ seat(s) have been reserved in your honor.

____ joyfully Accepts ____ Number of persons Attending

____ regretfully Declines

Names of guests attending
______________________________________

______________________________________

The favor of a reply is requested on or before ???

I plan to fill in the number of reserved seats which will be 4 (my sister & family and my uncle & his family) for 2 invites and 2 for everyone else.

I got one of my response card back that was only addressed to 1 person with the following:
Ms. Janet and 4 others will attend.
What the do you think I'm throwing?
a block party

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Posted by Latrice

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Posted by Soon2BMrsWilliams

Now I know that every bride can relate to this, some more than others. My RSVP deadline was June 6, and I still have a good amount of people who haven't responded, but I was prepared to make those phone calls. I was not prepared for the guest who would add more people to their response cards without at least calling me and asking. How could someone invite another person to a wedding that was not originally invitation. I am soooo MAD I could scream.

What gives the person the right to add people to response cards? I am so taken aback I don't know what to do. I plan on calling these quests and asking them to stick with the names on the invites but I might end up saying some not so nice things.

what is the best way to approach this without offending my guest? HELP Ladies!!!!

---

So far on 3 of my RSVP's my guests have added another person who was not on the invite. I expected this to happen since I had read so many posts from other LIW brides who went through this. What I have done is assigned this job to one of my bridesmaids to make the calls. She has a phone list and for those that add a person...she will say something on the order of 'my name is ... and I am apart of Latrice's bridal party. Latrice has asked me to call and thank you for responding to the invite. However, the guest list is very tight and, unfortunately, you will not be able to bring .... that you mentioned on your RSVP to the wedding. If that is a problem, please let me know so that I can update Latrice. Latrice really wants you to come but will understand if you can not make it if ..... is not i nvited. Thank you.

And thats it. I refuse to call people after I took my time to send out all of those invites. Utilize your BM's ladies...thats what they are for.

Good luck. But it is frustrating. But if I were to call, it would not come out as nice. It may sound rude so a BM is better for the job.

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This is a great idea. I think I will do that. Thanks again

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Posted by Bumsie

I got one of my response card back that was only addressed to 1 person with the following:
Ms. Janet and 4 others will attend.
What the do you think I'm throwing?
a block party

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I was thinking the same thing. I think people forget that this thing is not for free. You need to call this guest back and kindly let him or her know that they cannot add anyone to the list. It is a dirty job but someone has got to do it. Stand strong and don't back down.