Newly engaged - highly stressed

I just got engaged two weeks ago, and got 're-engaged' again when the ring was ready this week.

Everyone is asking me why I'm not excited and why I'm not having any kind of emotional response. Don't get me wrong I'm VERY excited, I love him and I never thought I'd be so happy with someone. He centers me, which I never thought was possible.

But we're eloping in 4 months and we haven't told his family yet - now with the stress of the holidays coming upon us, not sure what to do about them.

I'm also working 50+ hour weeks for a job I don't care for, we moved three weeks ago to NJ and now I have about 3 or 4 hours of commuting each day.

I'm just so tired and stressed. Everytime I do start to have a external reaction to my engagement (giddy or tears of joys, or excited), someone - usually a stranger or someone i don't care that much for - starts freakin out and having a reaction 10x stronger than mine, which makes me instantly reserved again.

Everyone keeps asking what's wrong with me. My future hubby understands me well enough that he knows everything is fine and he tells me as such.

But shouldn't I be acting like all these other women? screaming, crying, nearly fainting?

I was asked last night if I was enjoying the engagement - I've only had the ring three days. And my honest answer was not yet. To which the response I was given was that something must be wrong with me. How can I enjoy it? I have to tip toe around very sensitive issues (no big Catholic wedding for a quickie ceremony by Elvis) all the time. I can't be honest with anyone about our plans and that hurts.

I'm sorry to vent, but I am just being to wonder if something is wrong with me?

Lost & Confused....

Congrats on your engagement!

Maybe you are feeling like eloping is not the right thing to do? Is it what you really want? If it is, maybe you are just nervous, or in shock. Just let your feelings settle in and in the mean time, I would just tell people, yes I am very excited, when they ask if I was.

like the above poster stated... some girls are just not that emotional... doesnt mean you are not happy and excited!
if you feel that you are not ready to elope in 4 months.. maybe you should wait and take it all in first.. no need to rush!! its entirely up to you though!!

oh and congrats and welcome to liw!!

congrats on the engagement

let me just say that its OK for you not to jump up and down like a mad woman about being engaged!! i think the movies and tv give up SUCH a hype over the entire thing sometimes and make us feel like we're missing the 'B' gene if we don't pull out a binder full of wedding ideas since we were 5 when someone asks about the wedding!!!

you are just a low maintenance bride---you understand that while you are happy and marrying your wonderful man--that it is not the be all--end all of things and that you don't have to start taking lessons on how to walk down the aisle. i totally understand!

don't let others make you feel like you are not 'excited' enough about your engagement---you celebrate in any way you want. trust me -- i know what you mean. i never went nuts about my engagement--i was happy and mostly focused on saving money and living our life.

as for the family situation---just take that in stride and have your fiance with you to let them know your plans--that way you BOTH are there to say 'this is what WE want' cause i GUARANTEE ppl will try and dissuade you from your plans!

Thanks everyone. I appreciate it. I'm glad to know that I'm not the whack job I've been thinking I was.

I've been ready to marry my fellow for a very long time, and if were up to me, I'd go to Vegas Thanksgiving week and do it. LOL I've actually known since the first time we went to Vegas together (2 years ago this Thanksgiving) that he was the one for me and this was it. I tried to convince him to go to a chapel then, but obviously I didn't win. LOL

I can't wait for my wedding, we're hiring a photojournalist to follow us around a few hours each day and capture as much as possible - applying for the wedding license, the guys playing golf, the girls at the spa, both of us getting ready, etc. Our best friends from Texas are our witnesses. We've got four completely different ceremony ideas that we're choosing from. And three different color schemes ready (depending on which ceremony we go with). I'm VERY excited about all THAT stuff.

It's just the stuff in the meantime that's getting to me. My grandmother loves that we're eloping. I guess I just feel if she approves (she never approves of anything) that I should be able to tell everyone else and that's that.

Anyway, I need to get back to work. Gotta earn the paycheck to pay for the plane tickets and Elvis.

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Posted by VegasBride322

Thanks everyone. I appreciate it. I'm glad to know that I'm not the whack job I've been thinking I was.

I've been ready to marry my fellow for a very long time, and if were up to me, I'd go to Vegas Thanksgiving week and do it. LOL I've actually known since the first time we went to Vegas together (2 years ago this Thanksgiving) that he was the one for me and this was it. I tried to convince him to go to a chapel then, but obviously I didn't win. LOL

I can't wait for my wedding, we're hiring a photojournalist to follow us around a few hours each day and capture as much as possible - applying for the wedding license, the guys playing golf, the girls at the spa, both of us getting ready, etc. Our best friends from Texas are our witnesses. We've got four completely different ceremony ideas that we're choosing from. And three different color schemes ready (depending on which ceremony we go with). I'm VERY excited about all THAT stuff.

It's just the stuff in the meantime that's getting to me. My grandmother loves that we're eloping. I guess I just feel if she approves (she never approves of anything) that I should be able to tell everyone else and that's that.

Anyway, I need to get back to work. Gotta earn the paycheck to pay for the plane tickets and Elvis.

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i wish you guys all the best! and i love the photojournalist idea and having them follow you around--that will make for an awesome album!

Don't stress too much. I know---easy to say, hard to do...

You definitely shouldn't feel bad about not being overly excited yet. I have to admit, sometimes when I read some of the posts on here, I feel like there is something wrong with ME because I am not doing cart-wheels over my engagement. Every chick is different. I didn't cry when I went dress shopping like my sister did and I didn't cry when I asked my friends to by in my wedding party.

U have a lot going on in your life right now to already cause u a lot of stress...and weddings always bring more stress so it's natural that you're upset.

Do you want to elope? Are you going to be able to stay in Legas for a few days so it can be a vacation and break for you from all of the stress you have right now?

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Posted by skinny237

Don't stress too much. I know---easy to say, hard to do...

You definitely shouldn't feel bad about not being overly excited yet. I have to admit, sometimes when I read some of the posts on here, I feel like there is something wrong with ME because I am not doing cart-wheels over my engagement. Every chick is different. I didn't cry when I went dress shopping like my sister did and I didn't cry when I asked my friends to by in my wedding party.

U have a lot going on in your life right now to already cause u a lot of stress...and weddings always bring more stress so it's natural that you're upset.

Do you want to elope? Are you going to be able to stay in Legas for a few days so it can be a vacation and break for you from all of the stress you have right now?

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I didn't cry when I was dress shopping, or when I asked my friends to be in my wedding party. My mom and grandma cried when I tried on my dress -- does that count?