I finally decided to leave my job in the city to come back to LI, move in w/ my parents, and save money for a house w/ my FH. i accepted a job w/ my old boss at a law firm, which isn't really what i want to do but the pay is ok and its close to home. i told him i'd do it for about 6 mos or so, completely honest w/ him. anyway, when i told HR about it they offered me a promotion and a lot more money...i'm so confused! i guess i kind of have to take it, its a great opportunity and a lot of money. I have until Monday to tell them my decision. any advice?
(as a background, i currently do PR for an ad agency.)
smilealways
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Is it seomthing you want to be doing? Something you'd consider as a 'career'?
lillian771
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
yes, its definitely a great career opportunity, but along w/ the promotion and fat raise is of course a lot more responsibility and longer hours. i'm so confused and tired of the commute. my uncle has a 2BR in queens and will let me live there, but if i do i won't see FH as much for a while since he lives and works in suffolk county. it'll be a sacrifice, but maybe worth it in the end?
sometimes it is worth a small sacrafice now to have what you want in the end. My FH is a Marine, we sacraficed so much so that he could get a great education and training. Now when he is finally (can't wait) done he will be able to have an excellent job. This will help us get a house and take care of kids one day. I have to tell you not being with them is so hard and if you can't see him as much it is stressful and emotionally draining but when you do see each other it is that much more wonderful and in the end you will have what you want. If you both really want this (a house one day and a beautiful wedding) then it is probally worth a small sacrafice now.
eogara
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Personally I think it's worth it. I think we as women are expected to give up a lot when it comes to our careers what with kids, etc. Opportunities like this do not come along every day.
Will this be until the wedding next July (about a year and a half) or will you guys be able to move in together sooner?
bizzybridesmom
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Just something else to consider (as if you don't already have enough!) How do you feel about an employer who doesn't value you until you tell them you're leaving? Looks like they'd have been willing to use your talents without adequate compensation for as long as you'd have been willing to put up with it.
FLaCaTaCa
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
I would go with the bigger opportunity. Sacrifice for a bit and in the end you will look back and see it as worth it. It's a risk either way...only your truly know what you can handle. I would go for it, JMO. Good Luck!
lillian771
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Thanks everyone for all of your advice and words of encouragement. After discussing w/ FH, family, friends, and of course considering all of your advice, I think I am going to take advantage of this great opportunity. As eogara mentioned, we as women do have to give up a lot career-wise when it comes to family, so i might as well seize the moment while it is here! And lilqtny, your situation w/ FH has made me realize that everyone makes sacrifices in the beginning to make better lives for themselves later on.
Thanks again, I appreciate this board and you girls more and more everyday!
dkwife
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
One last thought on this... I am a recruiter and there are a few things about this topic that we always discuss with applicants... First, when you accept a counter offer, it usually doesn't last more than 6 months... Why wouldn't they reward you before? They also know that you were looking for something else and the reason they usually offer something more is b/c it costs them a lot of time and money to bring someone new in. Check out this list and do some research... but over the years in this biz, I find that counter offers tend to backfire... Good luck in whatever you decide to do : ) http://www.manageconsult.com/counteroffer.htm
lillian771
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Thank you searsc, you've made some very good points. The only reason I think this might be different, is that I think it was in the works before I told them I was leaving. Our company is currently undergoing major management changes, and it looks like my boss is going to be let go. I got the idea that there were bigger plans for me once she was gone, in another division of our company working for a woman who's always been very supportive of me. I will discuss it further with HR before accepting anything, and will take your comments into consideration.
steph4777
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Ladies gave you good advice and you seemed to have made your decision.
Just wanted to say Congrats and Good Luck!!
dkwife
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Everyone's situations are different, just wanted to point those things out... Good luck,let us know what you decide.
september2004
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Re: Not wedding related, but need advice...
Posted by searsc
One last thought on this... I am a recruiter and there are a few things about this topic that we always discuss with applicants... First, when you accept a counter offer, it usually doesn't last more than 6 months... Why wouldn't they reward you before? They also know that you were looking for something else and the reason they usually offer something more is b/c it costs them a lot of time and money to bring someone new in. Check out this list and do some research... but over the years in this biz, I find that counter offers tend to backfire... Good luck in whatever you decide to do : ) http://www.manageconsult.com/counteroffer.htm
yes...thank you for confirming this...
although there are exceptions to every rule this IS in fact a 'hidden one' for those people who find themselves in well managed organizations (key words well managed ). the only way that i have seen counter offers work are at VERY HIGH levels where a power play is being made and the individual in question needs to have a significant amount of support.
