NWR: Feeling Torn
Ok, girls this vent went longer than I thought it would...
About 2 months ago I mentioned that FH is looking at getting another job, but it would mean him quitting his current job and being unemployed for a bit.... So he's taking the new one, and today is his last day of work at the old one, yay! I can totally handle him being out of work for a month and a half and I know he's working really hard for the new one.
Well since he's studying to become a financial advisor there are a lot of tests and certifications he's got to get, he got his first one and he's now been studying for the BIG one, which he takes this Tues. Problem is, I don't think he's ready for it. If he fails its not the end of the world, he can take it again in 30 days, but he HAS to pass it to go to this training in Nov, and he has to get the training before he can start work 1 Dec (the training is 1 week once a month).
Here is my actual problem.. if he fails the test next week, then he will be re-taking it the ONE week I get to come home.... I'll have been gone for 5 months by that time and I can only come home for a week, and have been really excited about it (obviously). He has to do a lot of studying for this training when I'm home but I figured I would help him with it, no problem, I'll have homework myself.
But last night was when I realized that his re-test will be at that time too, and he was like well yeah... and then he said well I'll be taking this other test when you're home too so its no big deal. Well I had no idea this other test would be scheduled at that time either.
So as much as I really want to come home, now I find out that he has two big tests to study for in addition to these trainign conversations that has to be memorized, and now i'm feeling overwhelmingly disappointed and I don't really want to come back now. I told him last night that maybe its a bad time and his response was don't be silly, I'll be studying but its ok, I won't be working either. Which is true, but now I feel like I'll be wasting my vacation time which maybe I can just take at another time.
Now this is all a dead issue if he passes on Tuesday, but he went out both nights last weekend and he's going out tomorrow to see some friends (and he really hardly ever goes out since I've been gone). So I'm more pissed now like if he doesn't pass, thinking like wow I hope going out was fun, b/c now you ruined my trip home.
I know I'm partially being selfish, that I should go home no matter what because i haven't seen him in so long and I miss him, and I shouldn't take my frustration out on him b/c he's really training hard for this new job. But he made it seem like its ok that I'm only coming home for a week b/c we'll have all this time together, when in reality, there is no time.... Do i bother still coming home?
About 2 months ago I mentioned that FH is looking at getting another job, but it would mean him quitting his current job and being unemployed for a bit.... So he's taking the new one, and today is his last day of work at the old one, yay! I can totally handle him being out of work for a month and a half and I know he's working really hard for the new one.
Well since he's studying to become a financial advisor there are a lot of tests and certifications he's got to get, he got his first one and he's now been studying for the BIG one, which he takes this Tues. Problem is, I don't think he's ready for it. If he fails its not the end of the world, he can take it again in 30 days, but he HAS to pass it to go to this training in Nov, and he has to get the training before he can start work 1 Dec (the training is 1 week once a month).
Here is my actual problem.. if he fails the test next week, then he will be re-taking it the ONE week I get to come home.... I'll have been gone for 5 months by that time and I can only come home for a week, and have been really excited about it (obviously). He has to do a lot of studying for this training when I'm home but I figured I would help him with it, no problem, I'll have homework myself.
But last night was when I realized that his re-test will be at that time too, and he was like well yeah... and then he said well I'll be taking this other test when you're home too so its no big deal. Well I had no idea this other test would be scheduled at that time either.
So as much as I really want to come home, now I find out that he has two big tests to study for in addition to these trainign conversations that has to be memorized, and now i'm feeling overwhelmingly disappointed and I don't really want to come back now. I told him last night that maybe its a bad time and his response was don't be silly, I'll be studying but its ok, I won't be working either. Which is true, but now I feel like I'll be wasting my vacation time which maybe I can just take at another time.
Now this is all a dead issue if he passes on Tuesday, but he went out both nights last weekend and he's going out tomorrow to see some friends (and he really hardly ever goes out since I've been gone). So I'm more pissed now like if he doesn't pass, thinking like wow I hope going out was fun, b/c now you ruined my trip home.
I know I'm partially being selfish, that I should go home no matter what because i haven't seen him in so long and I miss him, and I shouldn't take my frustration out on him b/c he's really training hard for this new job. But he made it seem like its ok that I'm only coming home for a week b/c we'll have all this time together, when in reality, there is no time.... Do i bother still coming home?
