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NWR: FMIL vent

DanielleMF Posted:

NWR: FMIL vent

I have been with my FH since i was 15 (we are 26 now) and I have always felt like his mother doesn't like me....like everything i do is never enough. I always assumed it was because we were from different back grounds but now I don't know what to think.

Sunday the 30th is the trunk show at Macy's Manhasset- I have to go to get measured for my BM dress for a wedding I am in in May. If i don't go i will have to pay full price for the dress which is a little over 200.00 If i go, i get 15% off. That day is also the day she wanted everyone to get together to celebrate her b-day. When I explained i had made plans- she got upset that I wasn't going to cancel then for her. The show is at 1 and I am sure there is enough time after to do whatever she wanted but now i feel bad and don't know what to do.

Do I cancel my plans and pay full price for the dress to make her happy???


that's what I feel like doing
Melvin1297 Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

no don't start giving in now. I have been with FH since we were 17 (29 now) and his mom is starting to drive me crazy (more than ever before anyway) I put my foot down on letting her get the best of me when she tried to change our wedding date without asking us. Tell you in order to save for your wedding you need to do whatever you can so u will go to dress fitting, save your 15 % and then meet up with her afterwards. Good Luck but if you let her win now only more issues will come up... Trust me... Fm me if it gets too bad w/ her!!!

FutureMrsG Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Go and get your dress and meet up with FH and the family later.

MrsCM Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Don't cancel. You have a prior commitment, as in her 'deciding to celebrate her birthday' that day doesn't invalidate that if you need to save this money. Tell them that you will meet up with them as soon as you can. If she has an issue with it and it's that big of a deal, maybe she can pick another day since the wording you chose sounds like it isn't her birthday anyway.

Lsorrent Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

What time does she plan on having the family get together? If your fitting is at 1, I can't imagine the get together being that early....unless it's an all day thing.

I say just explain that you have this appointment and then go as soon as you're done.
kris_gets_hitched Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

I agree with the other girls - go to the appointment and meet up with everyone else afterwards.
You made a prior commitment. Fair's fair.

cavvento Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

No, don't cancel at Macy's. You have a right to have made your own plans. As long as you make effort afterwards to see her you can put your head down at night knowing that you did the right thing.

DanielleMF Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

There is one thing i left out....FH isn't available to celebrate that day either- he has to go to work to study for some exam he coming up. for some reason all the blame is put on me.

Thanks for your input
mag2010 Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Don't cancel your appt at Macys but I believe you the trunk show is also on the 29th. You should call and find out because this issue could easily be resolved if you can go to Macys on Sat instead of Sun.

marinai7 Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

I wouldn't cancel the appointment. Just go to the appointment and then meet up with them after.

StellaStar13 Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Tough, tough spot you are in but I think there is a reason why she is behaving as she is. As you stated, FH isn't going to be around that day either. Is it a possibility that maybe she feels that no one thinks her b-day is important and is feeling a little unloved??? Also....in my personal experience w/difficult women (I come from a family filled w/them ) If she didn't give a c*ap about you, she wouldn't give you a hard time.

I agree w/all the other ladies and say keep the appointment but maybe you could arrange for something special that just the two of you can do together to celebrate her b-day. Like my FMIL's b-day is on Sat, I am going to make arrangements to go shopping w/her to pick out her shoes for our E-party & I am going to take her to lunch.

HTH!!!!
MarjorieFrank Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Do not give in to her! If you do it now she will expect you to do it for the rest of your life.
There is plenty of time to spend with her for her birthday after you take care of your business. She sounds extremely immature and childish... who makes the entire 24-day about them on their birthdaay after they turn 8?
chreesta Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

I would go after. She should understand and be happy you are going at all! Good luck.

asg450 Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

You can do both; like everyone else said; don't give in. Since your appointment is at 1, I think you would still be able to do whatever she has planned for her bday after the appointment.

TheFutureMrsPM Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Dont give in! If you start cancling for her now she will expect it forever. Go to Macys like the other girls said and then meet up with FH and family when your done

Corinne Ann Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

i agree with the girls... go to macys and meet them after especially if FH isnt even going!!!!!

FMIL is getting on my nerves too!
StaceyWill Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Don't cancel the dress appt!!! You can celebrate with her afterwards...

Iluvpoodles Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

First off, you are under no obligation to spend the day with her for her bday. You are not her daughter. Yeah it would be nice, but don't cancel your appt. My fmil's bday is coming up and though I was invited by my FH not her directly to go out with them for her bday, I'm not going.

jenturch Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

Go for your appoointment and tell you you will do something afterward.

JennyAPH Posted:

Re: NWR: FMIL vent

No don't cancel your plans.. you can meet up with them afterwards.. she needs to be more flexible and understanding.. u already had plans that you cant cancel. End of story.

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