how do you deal with never knowing if they are getting the day off? p isses me off til no end! i accidentally offered to have xmas at my house this year and now i am starting to think i should withdraw my offer. always do xmas eve in SI til some ungodly hour after midnight and now i am thinking that if he doesn't get off, my xmas will be VERY 'unholiday-like' with all the running around and stuff. any advice? ps - he works 4-12's.
Samanthas Mom
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
can he request off now?? Its not like he is new on the job so he should have some seniority? I dont plan dinners unless I know for sure he is on vacation that week, etc..
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
no - they can only put the request in the month before.. and so will everyone else and their mothers... he has gotten it off the last few years bc of rank, but he did say that his squad has less men this year than ever before. ugh!
LizD
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
It is a pain in the a$$. We pretty much have holidays split between the families. If he is working I just go with whatever my family is doing. For big holiday like x-mas, we do x-mas eve with his family and the day with mine. If he is working than we do a family day with his family for exchanging gifts and dinner another day. They don't seem to mind and it works out for him too.
I don't think I would plan a dinner at home not knowing for sure if he would be off. I try to have a few parties/dinner throughout the year when I know he is off. Since we never really get to host the holidays, I like to have everyone over when we can anyway.
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
liz - that is exactly how we split it up on xmas.. his fam in SI on xmas eve and then all day with my family on the day of. i think i am going to withdraw my offer. hope they understand. i could only see one gripe... my one aunt who is a single mother who has hosted xmas day before... but everyone takes that into consideration and helps.. but still. i dont wanna be cursing each and everyone of them the day of, if he doesnt get off! i know it will just ruin my holiday sorry for the vent!
LizD
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
never be sorry for venting - that is what we are here for
I would cancel, it's plenty of time for other plans to be made. People will get over it, don't worry
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
yeah - that's what i am going to do. no need for the curses to be flying on one of the holiest days of the year! thanks liz!
itsbouttime
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
i come from a family of cops so holiday's in my life have never been normal. my dad worked midnights all my life. FH works 4-12's as well. and he loves this shift. he is not a morning person and never wants to work day shifts. Holiday's do really stink. our parents both live out of state so if he is ever off for a few hours on a holiday it is impossible to see both of our parents. after all these years of cops in my family, relatives still don't understand why you can't commit to holiday plans! it is so annoying!! i feel your headache girls!
sorry I know I am not a wife...but my uncles advice was - do not pick up the phone on your day off...
itsbouttime
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
thank goodness for caller id!!!
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
yes - it's def NOT fun! itsbouttime - some of my family and his STILL dont get it either.. amazing! it really stinks. but this is the life so... i just deal. yabbo... he never answers on his days off. it's amazing how many times they've tried calling him in!
Samanthas Mom
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
Erika- years ago that might have worked lol but today depending on your rank, they not only can call you at home but give you a cell phone and a beeper! so they are bound to get you
My DH Now has a Phone and beeper and unfortunately b/c he is high in rank when they call you in,you have to go
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
i'll make SURE that he doesn't get that far tammy! can't po's have a life? geeeez!
Samanthas Mom
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
LOL Lauren then you better not let him take the LT test after the sgt test b/c craig had a beeper as a LT Too and you are supposed to always leave it on and take it whereever you go, blah blah blah lol he wears both to the gym even ugh
I am so thankful that both our families understand, mine is used to it, and his is learning.
Tammy - that does ****, maybe the beeper and phone can get damaged in the steam room
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
hahahah liz! and they're learning... but not quick enough!
kelly6273
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
This part of the job stinks! I totally feel your pain!
My DH just switched over from PD to FD and I don't even know what he is working THIS week because I still can't figure out how to read the **** schedule!!!
joeslauren
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
kel - but i bet you will see a heck of a lot more of him now! i would much rather prefer the fd's schedule with the 24 hr shifts etc... anyway - they all stink from time to time when it comes to weekends and holidays and events. not right!
Samanthas Mom
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Re: nypd / fdny wives - holiday question
thanks ladies LOL LIz, he just does weights and cardio but that is funny!!
kel- craig has a crazy chart too of all captains in the borough its like a map acrosse, up and down and its for the whole year! worst part is they use that for their RDO's but the chart is always 'subject to Change' so I dont know his real schedule till every thursday when they type it up!!
so just b/c it says he is off on lets say November 19th that is not definite till November 12th! crazy I tell ya
