oh my god

This girl I work w/ just told me her fi doesnt wanna go thru with their wedding. She was supposed to get married this April!!!!

She had all the vendors, sent out invites EVERYTHING!

I feel so sorry for her what a low-life jerk!

She said she still loves him and will marry him when hes ready.

That makes me mad - would you marry someone who just did that to you?

I guess were all lucky our DHs/FIs love us and would never do something like that.

The poor thing.

WHAT A D I C K!

They are still together. She is good.

Though I do know of a couple like that. They ended up running off to vegas to get married.

OH MY!!! Your poor friend!

That is sad.

I hope she is okay ... that must be very upsetting!

I don't think the guy is a jerk really. I think the WRONG thing to do would be to get married and NOT want to. Marriage isn't about a party or invites. If he doesn't think that marriage is right for them, they should not get married. My stepmother told me that on the way to her 1st marriage, in the limo, she knew it was a bad idea. She wanted to stop the car, and have it bring her right home BUT she didn't because she was ashamed. All of the guests were waiting, the party was paid-for already. Well you know what, instead of stopping the wedding she ended up in an awful marriage for many, many years.

I am not going to judge either of these people. But I will say I hope that your friends heart finds true love and true happiness. I doubt I would stay with this guy myself, but again this is her life. She probably needs A LOT of support right now. Maybe you can invite her out to dinner or to a movie. After something like this she probably needs some time out and some friends.

That happened to me.. with Frank.. and i waited until he was ready..

Sometimes people get scared for alot of reason, and you cant force someone to get married, that would never work..

she should be happy that he said this now, then discovered a month after that he didnt want to marry her at all...that would be worse im sure.

You ladies are right. My comment was a reflex. I'd freak right now if my FH bailed....but I guess I would rather it be taken care of now than later....

yeah but come on theres a reason for the engagement period

if he couldnt have figured out then that it wasnt right BEFORE she planned out the entire wedding (something that most women dream about since they are kids) then hes slimy, immature, selfish and mean

she deserves better but i dont feel it is my place to tell her to leave him and find someone who really cares about her she needs to find this out on her own and would probably just resent me if i told her that

i really cant stand hearing stories of women who are treated like cra-p by men and just take it and still love them

This happened with my ex. 7 months before the wedding. So i told him to pack it up and move out. He was doing other things besides just not wanting to get married though. He posted a profile on adultfriendfinder and friendfinder.com. WITH intent on meeting them even though he denied it. Deep down i knew he wasn't right for me but was too stubborn to realize it sooner.

I know my current FH wouldn't do that.

I'm sorry for your friend...but she should look at this as something positive...

reevaluating their relationship...her career...the meaning of life...whatever...

So sorry to hear

but I have to agree with Michele ... to know that you do not want to marry someone & call it off is not wrong. Marriage & children with that person would be wrong. Just think what that would do to her. It's terrible that she got this far into her planning & its difficult & embarrasing, but in the end, it's better that she lose some money, than years of her life with this man who says he doesn't want to be with her.

He's actually giving her a gift. This allows her to be free to look for the person she's really meant to be with. Her reaction is normal. She's in shock & probably did not see it coming. Maintaining her feelings ... ie saying she's still in love & would still marry him .. keeps her safe from the pain that is inevitable when this all hits her.

Wish her luck & send her .

Starhead, I feel the exact same way. Frank got cold feet 20 days before our first wedding.

I think we are SO Much stronger as a couple!

I dont think he was slimy at all for not wanting to go through with it back then.

I agree with Michelle, better now than later with more complications. Yes, it's embarassing, but what can you do. I admit, that about a month before my wedding I starting freaking and qusetioning things, but mine just turned out to be cold feet. In my case it all turned out ok!(Thank goodness!) Just give her support right now, that's all you can do. Don't go off on him to her b/c like you said, she loves him and will probably defend him and bad-mouthing him might make her shy away from you. Just tell her what a great person and friend SHE is.
Good luck.