ok need opinions....**UPDATED***

so here is my situation -

i had a great group of girlfriends here @ the office. we were all friends outside of the office as well - going shopping, nail appointments, lunch, coffee, drinks, etc.

than about 2 months ago - something happened here @ work and one of the girls stopped speaking to me. i confronted the situation - asking her flat out 'are you angry w/ me for something?' and she said no and did not expalin her behavior so i figured it was something unrelated to me. 2 months later - i am pissed off cause i have no idea what i did and why the hell this girl is not speaking to me. to boot - it kinda hurt the whole group and none of do anything together anymore.

anyway - invites need to go out. i know she was excited for my wedding and me - but the girl has not spoken to me. we are not really 'friends' anymore - should i just send the invite? or no? and i dont really want to 'single' her out - so should i not invite the other girls who are now distant because of this??

what would you do?

**************
Ok - so my shower was this weekend - and they did not show but were invited. now what?

hmmm, that's a tough one. However, I will say that I would definitely not want someone at my wedding who had been treating me the way she is treating you. I honestly don't think I would send her an invite and if she confronts you about it I would just be honest and lay it all out on the table. If you send her an invite you have to be prepared in case she replies yes - that would stink.

you didn't single HER out, she did that to you. so no, I would not send her an invite. YOu gave her a chance to get anything you may have said/done out in the open and she didn't take it. yet she is being immature and still won't speak to you like a woman.

she has no reason to expect and invite, and she shouldn't be extended one. you said yourself she is not a 'friend'. that's all the reason you need.

incidentally, the same thing happened to me at work. it's not worth your time or further thought.

That's not an easy situation. Personally, I think if she's not mature enough to tell you why she's annoyed at you when she obviously is, I don't think you should invite her to the wedding. Leaves more room for people who actually deserve to be invited!!

I agree with the others.

I agree with everyone else - don't bother with the invite. If she didn't come to the shower or even acknowledge it yet this week at work by asking you how it went, then she doesn't need to be invited to the wedding.
Send that invite to someone who wants to celebrate with you.

---

Posted by JanuaryBride06

I agree with everyone else - don't bother with the invite. If she didn't come to the shower or even acknowledge it yet this week at work by asking you how it went, then she doesn't need to be invited to the wedding.
Send that invite to someone who wants to celebrate with you.

---

2 of them made no acknowlegdement - 2 did.

so - you would still leave them off - is that bad etiquette though?? i dont know.

part of the problem is one of the girls is the assistant to a boss that i am inviting - and i feel like if i still invite him (she gets all his mail) its like a total 'NOT INVITED' - which is not my personality. i can be a big B!tch and hardly am a pushover - but i am never in your face rude or insulting.

I'd still leave them off. I don't know if it's bad etiquette but sometimes you just need to say 'screw etiquette'. If she's not telling you what her problem is - I'd just leave them all off.
Are they worth the paper, stamp and possible plate?

I would not invite them. If they are going to not show at your shower, they would probably be even more evil and not show at your wedding, for which you would have already paid. Being there is an honor for which they are not deserving. JMHO.

It makes it tougher that they were invited to your shower!!! Technically, if they are invited to the shower, they should be invited to your wedding

BUT...

Since she's got some sort of an issue with something, I wouldn't invite her. Definitely not worth it!

Something similar happened to me at work, someone that I was close with one day just decided that we weren't friends anymore. It is very difficult to deal with. It makes things weird at work (especially when it seems that you are the only one they have a problem with) Luckily, she's no longer here. Funny enough, I now have her old office .

Because of that, I distanced myself from a lot of people I work with and I don't think I'm inviting anyone from my office.

---

Posted by JandJ1224

If they were invited to the shower I think they need to be invited to the wedding. They could say no but you should invite them, all of them..

---

i think this is what i am going to do. i feel like it gives me an 'upper hand' in some way. they do not get to gossip around the office about that they got invited to the shower and not the wedding - and than if i ever feel like calling them out i can - cause i know i did nothing wrong to them.

even though i have no desire in anyway to have them there - i think it is what i will do....