So, here I am spending all this freaking money on a wedding, yet I have no house to live in. What the HELL is WRONG WITH US? We could be buying a beautiful house right now with the money we are spending on this wedding (well, we could at least afford the down payment on a beautiful home). Yet, we chose to spend THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS of dollars on one day. ONE DAY PEOPLE. There's something wrong with this. I cannot even believe I made such a stupid choice. A wedding or a house? Hmm, let me throw it all away on flowers and a space that I can rent for 24 hours. I feel like the biggest idiot. Now JT and I will be living in a cardboard box, but at least we had the chocolate fountain and pretty flowers. ARGH! I'm just so mad at myself. And we've already paid too much to vendors and what not to downsize. I just feel like a fool for spending all this money
BlondeJD
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
I definitely hear what you're saying. My BM can't believe that I'm spending more on my wedding than she makes in a year and there really is something wrong with that. For us, the house vs. wedding thing hasn't been so much of an issue because neither of us is really looking to buy anything right now. We're probably moving back to Manhattan after the wedding and, while we're happy to rent a large 1 bedroom or 2 bedroom in NYC, we're not going to pay $500K and up to buy that apartment. I just keep thinking of all the other things I could be doing with this money, like paying off student loans, sending my mother on a nice vacation, etc.
prncssrachel
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
Don't get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with ANYONE spending as much or as little as they want on their wedding, but as far as JT and I go, we really want a house or SOMETHING we can call our own, and we just don't have the money, yet somehow, we're having an elaborate wedding. It just doesn't make sense to me. But at the same time, I know I would feel like I was cheating myself by having my wedding any other way. I guess in the end it all just works out, but I just feel like a moron.
Karacg
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
Why don't you try to buy a small co-op? That way you are investing your money, not just losing it on rent. Then when you are ready you sell the co-op (I made 50% profit in 2 years) and use that $ for a down payment.
You can still save $ on the honeymoon, favors and if you really want to, I am sure you can speak with vendors about down-sizong. They are there to make you happy. You wouldn't belive what it means to a vendor when you mention that you post on liweddings...then they will REALLY try to make you happy!
Boop2704
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
I felt the same way, and we basically are living one step up from a cardboard box today, but once you get to your wedding day and its just a whole day of celebrating yours and your FH's love for each other with all your family and friends, you won't regret it, nor will you want to trade it in for anything else. At least thats how I feel today!! Do we want a house? Yes Are we miserable where we live now?Yes But DH and I both know that in time everything we want in life will come to us, the house, the kids. Things just take time. One thing at a time!!
February05
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
i totally understand where you are coming from, rachel. but if its any compensation at all, think about all the memories and photographs that will last a lifetime. People who have been married 50years still recall, in vivd detail, how wonderful their wedding day was. I stress about the money (and lack there of)... but it really is an amazing way to celebrate the beginning of your life together. its just hard to see that when all the freakin' bills are coming in
DebsNY
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
I entirely understand how you fell... especially when I was looking at houses down here in Virginia and realized i could take the money that's being spent on the wedding and easily put a very generous down payment on a decent townhome next year (mind you, this is rural virginia, so we can buy a 3 bedroom townhome for under 100,000).
Oh well... it's the apartment life for us till FH gets out of school officially, and then we'll start seriously looking for a home...
Whenever i get in one of those moods i just try to think to myself how wonderful our $25,000 - $30,000 day is going to be...
ckgmwedding
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
Posted by 121502
So, here I am spending all this freaking money on a wedding, yet I have no house to live in. What the HELL is WRONG WITH US? We could be buying a beautiful house right now with the money we are spending on this wedding (well, we could at least afford the down payment on a beautiful home). Yet, we chose to spend THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS of dollars on one day. ONE DAY PEOPLE. There's something wrong with this. I cannot even believe I made such a stupid choice. A wedding or a house? Hmm, let me throw it all away on flowers and a space that I can rent for 24 hours. I feel like the biggest idiot. Now JT and I will be living in a cardboard box, but at least we had the chocolate fountain and pretty flowers. ARGH! I'm just so mad at myself. And we've already paid too much to vendors and what not to downsize. I just feel like a fool for spending all this money
You will have the house too- just a little longer wait. The housing market is nuts right now anyhow. You really don't want to look back and regret having your big day. If possible look for ways to cut corners, be creative and you feel better about it. We are paying for our whole wedding(with a little help from our parents) and getting a house at the same time. I know that I am lucky since I bought a condo before I even met myFH so we have the downpayment, but even if we didn't we will still have our big day. Look at what your are spending your money on and if anything can go, do it. It is just one day but a very important one. Take the gifts from the day, start a savings account and plan for the house next. By next year, I think you will find the market a little more bearable anyhow
prncssrachel
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
Thanks girls. I know it will all work out in the end, I just have a hard time grasping all the money we are spending. I mean, I feel we have cut corners in many ways. We are using a freelance photojournalist for a pictures instead of a traditional wedding photographer, we're not taking an elaborate honeymoon, we're not using some outrageously expensive band, etc., so I know I actually HAVE cut corners, but I have a hard time even justifying if my wedding cost 5 thousand dollars, let alone more than ten times that. We are lucky in many ways, however. My parents are helping us out in more ways than one, including allowing us to live with them now to save money, and they are paying for about half the wedding, so I really am lucky. But I keep hearing from them that I should have used their money for a downpayment on a home and instead had a much smaller wedding with my own money. But whatever, I guess it is what it is, and I know I will always remember the day and that it is one of the most important days in my life. I know, I know. I just panic a lot over it lately. Thanks again girls
MegLehner
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Re: Ok, related to the HOW MUCH thread...
We second quess our decision some times too! Its like do you want $65k for a house or a wedding? We are not paying for anything wedding ourselves so we could have gotten a lot $ for a house. But - Im not too stress about getting a house because living in ny/li is not an option for us. Where we live or want to live in the future is so much cheaper than ny/li .
