My daughter will be 16 when we get married.. graduating from high school. My FH has been in her life since she was 3 and has been the best daddy to her. He considers her his daughter. The thing is I don't want to have any more children..never wanted more than one. He doesn't have any children of his own and says that all that matters is that I become his wife..but deep down I think he wants to have a baby. I feel scared and anxiety filled.. I feel that everyone thinks once we get married that I'll change my mind but I don't think so.. I have a feeling that he kinda expects it too.. Anyone in the same situation?
MrsDtoBe09
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
Not in the same situation, but I would imagine HONESTY is the best policy. Sit down and have an honest conversation!
CMS
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
To be honest, I've never wanted to have children. I LOVE being an aunt and think kids are the greatest, but they're not for us.
FH and me have been together for 12 years. I'll be 38 when he gets married, he'll be 43.
So I don't anticipate us changing our minds.
Nelle5757
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
Ha this was going to be my question of the day tomorrow!!!! Funny.
I want children within a year after we get married. I am excited for a baby and I will be 30 as well. A lot of my friends just started having babies, so I get baby fever a lot.
Nelle5757
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
I forgot to add you def need to sit down and have this conversation with your FH. This is a very important topic which I believe shoud be discussed before the vows are taken. Just my opinion.
stephlovesseyi
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
I want to start having kids within a year-a year and a half of getting married. I will be 27 when we get married he will be 32. I don't know when it happened, but Im ready, in my heart, to be a mother.
Now I just need to get ready financially!
xBrunette
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
you have to talk to him and see if he really wants to have children of his own, and if it's that important to him... it's a choice you both have to make...
i'm not in that situation... i would love to have children right now, but right now i feel too selfish to have a child and raise it, plus we're not in the financial means to have one either... i know i want to wait like 3 years before i have any kids.... i want to enjoy my marriage and FH...
yngcpl92203
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
Not in the same situation but me and fh agree on children. POSSIBLY 6
kabo0831
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
I would sit down and talk about it,
Chanwich
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
We aren't in that situation, but we have sat down and had a real discussion about it and decided that kids just aren't for us. At least right now. Who knows how those feelings might change down the road. But I think you should definitely sit down with your FH and both be completely honest about what you want and get it out in the open
CMS
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
You definitely need to sit down and have this talk with him. It's not the easiest conversation to have, but it has to be done.
I started chemo in Sept and I was told there would be a 15% chance that I would be infertile, so FH and me were given the option of freezing eggs. Luckily we had had the conversation years before where we had agreed that children weren't for us. So it was a bit easier for us to make the decision to go right into treatment instead of freezing the eggs. But imagine how difficult it would be to suddenly be forced into having to make these decisions without ever having discussed it before.
Sit him down, talk to him, and see what he says. Right now you're going on your assumption that he wants kids, when he hasn't said he does or doesn't.
Good luck.
aliska21
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
not in the same situation but FH and i cant wait to have a baby!!!!! He always says A BABY IS A BLESSING!!!! i love him!!
amunson
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
FH has already picked out the names...we argue mostly about number. I want 2 because I don't want to be outnumbered - he just wants to keep going until we have a girl!
beram63
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
it's so weird because we've been having this conversation a lot recently--whether or not to have kids. lately i've been asking myself why a lot, but part of me feels like i'll end up doing it. i'm just not necessarily looking forward to being up to my eyeballs in bodily fluids, diaper bags, and dora the exporer; it's hard for me to imagine the goods stuff that balances that out bc i've never been a mother.
really freaked about everything i'd have to give up, but also drawn to the idea of starting a family of our own and raising a couple of good human beings.
Marissa09Bride
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
At his point in time, I can't imagine being a mom. I won't rule it out completely in the future, but not for a while...For now we just want more puppies
dazies1011
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
My son will be 14 when FH and I get married and I want more children but, still unsure since it'll be starting all over again. FH wants 1 or 2 but, says he'll be fine if we get 5 others dogs to add to our 2,lol. My thing is there is almost 2 yrs and things can change then but, you really do need to sit down and talk with him.
AugustBridein09
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
I want kids after 2 to 3 years after we get married......and I want 1 and only 1 kid....and NO more.
crazeee18
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
im not in the same situation but i def think u should sit down with him and let him know how u feel..it wouldnt be fair to either one to keep ur true feelings locked up ....
little34
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Re: Once married, does everyone want children?
We don't want kids at all. Everyone keeps saying we will change our minds but I am almost 30 and I still don't have that urge....never did.
