one more last question before the big day.

Jante Posted: Jun 12, 2004 10:12 AM

one more last question before the big day.

I spoke to the owner of the hall and he said it is customary to give $2 per person in totall to the captain/matre de the night of the wedding. That would come to about $368. Doesn't that seem high for a tip? and then $50 - $100 for the bridal attendant and then $10 -$20 for the waiters. What is everyone going to give or have given. I just think after all the money spent and a $18 service charge these amounts seem high.

tonia1001 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 10:16 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

Funny you mentioned this-I was speaking to my FMIL yesterday and she told me that you should give the maitre d a like $800+ tip--I almost fell off my chair!!! I think its insane!!!! I guess that's what's to be expected, but I think its WAY too much!

[email protected] Posted: Jun 12, 2004 10:23 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

I just took a look and I gave him $750 and $125 to each of my two assistants...

B2BMay04 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 10:35 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

I agree with you we thought it was insane when we were planning the tip envelopes.
We gave our Matre D' roughly 3 per person. But we had a small wedding. It seems you are having a larger wedding. I am not sure what the impact is for a larger wedding versus a smaller wedding for the Matre D but I think unless he/she is so exceptional I would give the minimum $2 per person. The bridal attendant on the other hand we gave her 150 because she really worked her butt off for us. She made sure I wasn't talking for too long of a time with some people (we had a hand signal :) she was always bringing us fresh drinks. She made sure we ate some of the food from the CH. So honestly I felt like she deserved the $$. Make an (a) and (b) envelope for some of these questionable tips. That is what we did :)

Where did the 10-20 come from for the waiters? Their tip is included in the gratuities!

Good Luck

nferrandi Posted: Jun 12, 2004 10:42 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

Definitely do NOT tip the waiters, that should be included in your service charge. I think $2 for the maitre'd is reasonable, though I agree it's a lot of money for someone you're not even really sure what they do. I'll probably tip the bridal attendent between $75-100 based upon what she actually does for us.

luvsun27 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 11:32 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

DO NOT TIP THE WAITERS!!! That is why you pay 18% gratuity.

I did tip $3 pp for the matre'd, but we had a small wedding, so it was only like $250 total. I gave the bridal attendant $75.

Darcy Posted: Jun 12, 2004 11:57 AM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

My place mentioned 1-3 dollars a person for the MD who will then split it with the waiters. 50-100 for the bridal attendent. Nothing else. Our service fee is going to other things, like the concert pianist, valet (because you don't tip the valet) and such.

FoxHollowbride0617 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 12:34 PM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

I think $2-3 per person is the going rate. It does seem like alot when you still have to pay the 18% service fee

Boop2704 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 01:57 PM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

My banquet manager told me that the large sum given to the Maitre'd is actually split up afterwards. The maitre'd does not keep the total 368 you figured. He actually distributes part of it to the waiters. Thats why we didn't tip the waiters.

Summer05 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 04:46 PM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

Posted by Boop2704

My banquet manager told me that the large sum given to the Maitre'd is actually split up afterwards. The maitre'd does not keep the total 368 you figured. He actually distributes part of it to the waiters. Thats why we didn't tip the waiters.

I doubt it... I have worked at many, many catering halls and for the most part the maitre'd keeps all of what you give them.

The 18% gratuity goes to the waitstaff.
Some places may do it differently, but this had been my experience.

JenniferLee111204 Posted: Jun 12, 2004 04:52 PM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

i also worked at a catering hall.

The matre d' NEVER shared what he got!! NEVER!!!

wcc suggested 3-5 pp.. i mean i wanted to throw up! give me a break! then anywhere from 75-150 for bridal att. UGH.

it comes down to this.

youre going to be sucked dry by the end of the night.

CheeChee Posted: Jun 12, 2004 04:53 PM

Re: one more last question before the big day.

I gave $150 to the Matre D. I think its totally ridiculous to tip $3-5 per person. For what? please. I think the $22,000 they got for the hall alone was plenty. JMO I gave the bridal attendent $100, and then tipped all my vendors..