ONE THORN IN THE PACK

All is going perfect with our wedding plans until the end on my bridal shower when I learn my bridesmaid left unhappy, it seems my wonderful brothers fiancee is so mad because she is not in my bridal party, she seems jealouse but we dont know why. She is also engaged and this will be her 2nd marriage and my first. I am doing something special for her during the Reception as in presenting her with the bouquet because she has been with my brother for 12 years and waited all this time for him to propose to her. But she had to be so miserable and rude to my guests at the shower and never even came up to us and congratulated us on Our special day-Coed shower day. Then I hear she feels I am leaving her out, Im not close with her and she also stated I should of asked her first to be in my bridal party before the other girls and she is pissed that one of my bridesmaid who has a boyfriend is in it, she dated my brother 17 years ago, all I can say is she needs to get over it....what is wrong with her, she didnt even come to our engagement dinner with the immediate family, she was getting her hair done instead which pissed me off. She got engaged a few months after me and it seems she is not getting her way with her wedding so she is taking it out on me and my fiancee... My brother is walking me down the aisle so he is kind of in the middle of her nightmare. Ughhh ....I am so upset, .I wish people would just be nice for one day.......

I think he knows, but he kind of never says anything, all he says is its my day, do what we want, he is so nice and dosent want any problems, I tried to bring it up to him in a nice 30 second conversation, and he avoided it. He wants all the best for me and my future husband.
As for her, well, I know she is not getting what she wants out of her wedding plans, because we know he dosent really want a big wedding or anything, which is fine, but she said yes to him, not me and that is there problem, did I mention she will be 41, she is not a kid.....thanks for everyones kind words, I am trying to remain calm and just ignore her thats all we can do..

sorry for the stress!

OMG that is so annoying.
SO ANNOYING!
I went through something sort of similar....not as bad though.
I didn't have a shower, but I was made to feel guilty for not including my FSIL in my wedding.
Truth is, I'm just not that close to her (sounds like you're not either) and in all the time that DH and I were dating/engaged, she never once reached out to me.
So, with that said, I didn't feel guilty and neither should you
Remember, THIS IS YOUR SPECIAL DAY. Nobody elses. You do what YOU WANT.
You only get one day in your life (wedding day) to get whatever you want.
Its all about YOU!
So, if didn't include her, its b/c you didn't want to, and if she acts like a clam......ignore her.
Remember, its all about YOU.

So sorry this is happening to you, especially at your shower! Maybe speak to your brother and ask him if everything is OK. She seemed unhappy at the shower. See what his response is.

I'm so sorry she's causing you stress! You don't have to ask someone to be in the bridal party simply because she's your brothers bethrothed especially if you aren't even close to her!
And with the way she's acting, she's extremely immature and rude and it's best you didn't ask her anyway!!

I had one of my older friends make me feel bad about my bridal party too...but I hadn't talked to this girl in years!

You should tell her to grow up and stop acting like a baby! This is your wedding and you can have who ever the hell you want in it!

So sorry that you are going through this. She really needs to grow up with it and not take it out on you or your guests.

i'm so sorry you're going through this. I can't believe she's 41 and acting like a child! try not to stress it. Sounds like the kind of person you can't even be close to even if she wanted to.
She sounds jealous.
Take it easy

We are really sorry to hear about this! We totally understand. But she really needs to grow up!!!
This is your and your FH's special day.

~dancer and chef~