Opinions?

What do you girls think about this situation?

FH & I want to setup my bestfriend with one of his family friends. We made plans to go out a few months ago, the 4 of us were going to go out to dinner, but something happened & it was cancelled & we just got around to rescheduling it for this Saturday.
Here's the thing, the guy told FH that we should make it a group thing & invite his brother & wife & FH's brother & wife - but just a few months ago he was excited about just the 4 of us going out so he can get to know my friend. I think its weird, do you think the guy is involved with someone but wants to meet my friend anyway, or do you think he's just shy & want more familiar faces around to feel comfortable?

there is no way to know for sure unless you ask him straight out - but it sounds like he just wants this to be a more laid back, casual, natural type of thing and less of a 'set up' aka 'date' sort of thing..

Its often very awkward to be put on the spot and forced to make conversation in a 'double date' sort of scenario , so this might actually work out much better in the long run

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Posted by don424

option #2 is my guess

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I hope you're right, because I would hate for him to be seeing someone without being honest about it!

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Posted by FeliciaDA

there is no way to know for sure unless you ask him straight out - but it sounds like he just wants this to be a more laid back, casual, natural type of thing and less of a 'set up' aka 'date' sort of thing..

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Maybe that's how he sees it, but I think that it would make my friend uncomfortable being that she doesn' really know any of the people he wants to invite....

maybe because it's cuz i'm a guy, but i'm wondering how one can draw the conclusion that he is involved with someone else because he wants to invite more people

i'm sure there is logic here, just can't see it

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Posted by don424

maybe because it's cuz i'm a guy, but i'm wondering how one can draw the conclusion that he is involved with someone else because he wants to invite more people

i'm sure there is logic here, just can't see it

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I agree with you , actually - there is no real way to come to the conclusion that this guy is seeing someone else based on the information you have here

I think maybe the original poster is questioning this only because the original scenario was a 'double date' and he seemed cool with that - and now its like, lets make is a big group type of thing.. It sounds like now he is going along with it just out of obligation and it trying to make the best of it, make it more casual and less 'date like' .. this way if they don't remotely hit it off he has a group of HIS friends/family there to hang out with

Personally (this is to the original poster) I'm pretty blunt, so I would just ask him straight out what the deal it - there is nothing here that says he cannot be dating other women though, lets be honest. But if you feel your girlfriend is looking at this as a BLIND 'DATE,' then you need to clarify the situation.. especially if you think she is going to be uncomfortable with the fact he is inviting his brothers and their SO's and perhaps that he is seeing other women

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Posted by FeliciaDA

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Posted by don424

maybe because it's cuz i'm a guy, but i'm wondering how one can draw the conclusion that he is involved with someone else because he wants to invite more people

i'm sure there is logic here, just can't see it

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I agree with you , actually - there is no real way to come to the conclusion that this guy is seeing someone else based on the information you have here

I think maybe the original poster is questioning this only because the original scenario was a 'double date' and he seemed cool with that - and now its like, lets make is a big group type of thing.. It sounds like now he is going along with it just out of obligation and it trying to make the best of it, make it more casual and less 'date like' .. this way if they don't remotely hit it off he has a group of HIS friends/family there to hang out with

Personally (this is to the original poster) I'm pretty blunt, so I would just ask him straight out what the deal it - there is nothing here that says he cannot be dating other women though, lets be honest. But if you feel your girlfrined is looking at this as a DATE, then you need to clarify the situation, especially if you think she is going to be uncomfortable with the fact he is inviting his brothers and their SO's.

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agreed, you need to set the parameters

the more people you have, the less it's gonna be like a date

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Posted by don424

maybe because it's cuz i'm a guy, but i'm wondering how one can draw the conclusion that he is involved with someone else because he wants to invite more people

i'm sure there is logic here, just can't see it

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The only reason I thought he might be involved with someone is because when we originally had plans a few months ago, he was looking forward to getting to know my friend & it just being the 4 of us, but now, he specifically told FH that he wants to do 'a group thing'....

ETA - also, as I said before - my friend doesnt really know any of the other people that he wanted to invite. I know that before I met FH, if anyone wanted to set me up with someone, even if it was just a casual meeting, I would feel very uncomfortable if a bunch of married couples I never met before were going to be there....