paying child support

RockysGirl Posted: Oct 28, 2008 05:46 PM

paying child support

My FBIL just got word that his child support is being raised to a ridiculous amount. He got some girl pregnant back when he was a stupid teenager and he actually never even met the kid. There's no visitation or anything like that. Obviously he still needs to pay the child support either way, but i was very surprised by the AMOUNT he's being charged all of a sudden. It was never that much until now (about 9 or 10 years later). It's more than he pays for rent in his little studio apartment. He's so afraid that he's not going to be able to afford College anymore - can barely get groceries as it is. Is there ANY way to appeal the decision on that??? I know that in most cases, the courts rule in favor of the mother (even when the mother's a psycho). But I'm sooo surprised that they didn't take into consideration what he can AFFORD. Is there any hope, or is that decision final and he just needs to make due. Drop outta school and basically stop eating more than a poptart a day. It's only one kid. How much does that one kid need?

I just feel so bad for him. I'm hoping that there's some way to appeal that.

Kricket212 Posted: Oct 28, 2008 08:05 PM

Re: paying child support

I don't think there is anything he can do...but since he is paying he should see the child. One only gets one chance at this as the kids grow up so quickly. I know it's none of my business but IMO he should be there because the child didn't ask to be born etc.

I think the average is about 17% of your salary. My Brother was paying like $800- a month but now he is taking care of them so mom is paying the suport.

debismom Posted: Oct 28, 2008 08:15 PM

Re: paying child support

My Grandson receives child support. I don't know about other states, but in Pa. the combined incomes of the father and his wife (not my Grandson's Mom) were taken into consideration, as well as my Daughter's income. The father initially paid more than what was stated, to get the arrears up to date. We are very happy for his faithfulness in making his payments. I do feel sorry for my young Grandson, who has never received presents, cards, or a visit from his father, even though he was invited to do so. I cannot imagine how he must feel, never hearing from his father. It breaks my heart, because I love him so much, and he deserves better. Mary MOB

angels914 Posted: Oct 28, 2008 08:40 PM

Re: paying child support

Your brother should see his child if he is paying. If he is paying then he has every right to see him. My ex pays me a set amount each week from what we worked out through our divorce. Your brother needs to look into this further and see what rights he has !!!!!!!!

Sweeteey51 Posted: Oct 28, 2008 10:19 PM

Re: paying child support

You know if your brother in law files for half custody his child support will be reduced. But he can only get half custody if they live in the same state. My cousin has been going through this for years lol. He couldnt get half custody because he moved out of state. Honestly i think its unfair the court system needs to tweek these laws alittle bit because some cases you have fathers thats taken care of there kids but the mother is being vindictive and then they have to pay whole crap load of money. My cousin makes 400 a week and hes ordered to pay 1200 a month yet the mother makes 60k a year. crazyyy. Like *** who can live off 400 a month. lol. I say he needs to make sure he sees his kid if hes payin all this money.

kristi313 Posted: Oct 28, 2008 10:29 PM

Re: paying child support

If he lives in NY they should only be taking 17% of his gross salary. he would've had to give his tax returns in order for them to come up with the amount.

kimNanthony Posted: Oct 28, 2008 10:55 PM

Re: paying child support

I am a family law attorney so if you have any questions feel free to FM me. Some of the comments are not accurate so if you have any questions let me know!

MSeed Posted: Oct 29, 2008 08:11 AM

Re: paying child support

Usually the child support goes up when the kids get older. Things get more expensive the older they get. I believe he can appeal the decision. The amount of child support is usually based on your income.

jaep129 Posted: Oct 29, 2008 09:25 AM

Re: paying child support

Isn't it crazy. They go by how much he makes but they don't take into consideration other bills. My BF has a 6 year old and her husband (they were married two months and then she left and are still by law married) has seen Kaylee 3 times. She took him to court to get more $ b/c he quite his job and got one off the books so he can say he makes less. I am sure he can take her to court to lower the amount. I would tell him to get a lawyer or talk to his child's child advocate. Good luck!

Kat228 Posted: Oct 29, 2008 09:46 AM

Re: paying child support

Posted by kristi313

If he lives in NY they should only be taking 17% of his gross salary. he would've had to give his tax returns in order for them to come up with the amount.

This isn't always true. It's up to the judge or magistrate. My sons Father was ordered to pay more than 17% of his last tax return and it was known that he had been out of work for months.

Kricket212 Posted: Oct 29, 2008 10:15 AM

Re: paying child support

Posted by MSeed

Usually the child support goes up when the kids get older. Things get more expensive the older they get. I believe he can appeal the decision. The amount of child support is usually based on your income.

I believe child support goes up because of Cost of living & because the father usually gets raises. You can take the father to court every 2 yrs to get it adjusted.

Mrs. Bernabe Posted: Oct 29, 2008 10:45 AM

Re: paying child support

i think its ridiculous for the court to ask for so much. I am sure he has his own bills to pay and will have a new family someday. But what bothers me that it may be that she is not letting him see his kid, if that is the case and he wants to be apart of his kids life he can file for partial custody. Either than that I don't know what to say. I have heard of men who leave this country to have to not pay child support. The courts should determine a fair amount which helps support the child and be able to not struggle to live.

MrsHtobe Posted: Oct 29, 2008 10:47 AM

Re: paying child support

I can understand where your FBIL is probably coming from - but I mean 'how much money can a kid possibly need?'

Kids are expensive. Clothes, food, necessities, i'm not sure but i would assume daycare comes out of that too. . .its not cheap, its supporting another entire person.

I'm sure your brother can appeal it, and if he is paying that much in child support he should be able to get to know his child. . if he wants of course. . . but having a child is expensive, and even if he doesn't see the child, its just as much his responsibility to make sure he/she is taken care of as it is the mothers.

I have no children - but have friends who have kids and its hard. . . . i'm sure the mother probably puts just as much toward the child. . .but this is JMO, I don't mean to offend anyone. Maybe it is unreasonable, but also, just maybe, people just don't realize how expensive children can be.

Good luck - I hope he figures it out

RockysGirl Posted: Oct 29, 2008 11:26 AM

Re: paying child support

thanks everybody... it helped to read these comments. I do think it's very wrong what the baby's momma is doing to my FBIL. She had originally told him that she would send paper work to STOP child support years ago when she had asked that he not be apart of the child's life. (She got re-married and just wanted an uncomplicated life for the kid). Well, she never sent it in, but the payments stayed pretty low at least. And THEN she got in this big fist fight with FBIL's sister (nothing related to the kid - just personal issues) and basically told him that he needs to choose between the kid & his family. Which is stupid, because he doesn't even know the kid and the baby's momma is a psycho. So when he kind defended his fam, she got all crazy and now raised the child support. Even though she makes more than DOUBLE what he makes AND has a husband with his own income as well. I honestly don't think she needs this extra money. She's just being vindictive. I hate how courts don't take any of that into consideration. If somebody actually stopped and took a LOOK at the situation, they'd see that what they're asking him to give is ridiculous. And it makes me sad for him.

SFAR89 Posted: Oct 29, 2008 11:37 AM

Re: paying child support

He is sure that the kid is his? Paternity test and all??? Why is there no visitation? Does he want to see the kids? He can fight that cant he?

that is just insane....It *****. When we were younger and my dad went to jail, the courts allowed my mom to get $20 a MONTH for each child. It ***** that no one can really do anything about it. :( I do hope something works out for him.