My FMIL is driving me NUTS!!! Everything we do she has a remark for. The new thing is the invitations, she asked last night if the middle initial of his father is on the invite. When we said NO she huffed and said well it would have looked more formal and be a nice gesture. Now what ****es me off is that they arent doing a thing for this wedding. NOTHING!! ZILCH!! They are lucky their names are on the invitation at all, and at the top with MY parents names no less. UNREAL!! Last time I checked this was OUR wedding. This is all on top of everything else we did. The flowers were another story, she said why spend so much money on roses when you can get carnations for half the price. Carnations??!! This is just a little taste there has been so much more that they have had to say, and I dont understand why they think they CAN!! She complains when we dont tell her anything but Can you guys understand why we dont? GRRR... I am so annoyed. They are making this a miserable experience.
Sorry for the vent !! And thanks for listening.
Boop2704
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
If she is not paying, then she has no say!! Tell FH to remind her of this. She should be happy her name is even on the invitation at all. Usually the grooms parents don't even go on the invitation!!!!
palebride
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
is he her only son? maybe she's upset that she's 'losing' him and this him how it's coming across!! I think you should have FH talk to her and explain that her suggestions and questions aren't helping anyone...but in a nice way! just becuse she's not helping financially doesn't mean she shouldn't be able to give you one of two suggestions or hints....if she's trying to take over, that's another thing! But she simply may not understand how she's coming across!!!
good luck!!
Scooby319
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
Thank you girls...
He has two other brothers, but he is the oldest. SO i can understand if she is a little emotional about losing him, but she needs to understand that the things that she is saying and doing is turning him off completely towards them.
tracyg
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
I hear ya!!! Thats my motto... you give us money, you have a say in what we do. If not, then If i hear 'you should really do the bouquet toss!! Let people have some fun' from my FSIL one more time i'm going to lose it!!!! the weddings not fun enough???? (i hate the toss, and its my wedding, so shut it!!)
we should just have a VENT thread... where everyone can just go and air their gripes!
Xelindrya
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
Please.. how rude.. she may be upset losing her son.. but you have EVERY right to be upset at this type of harassement
tracyg
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
plus some parents like to pick at things so they can feel like they have some say or control over whats happening with the planning.... just ignore her and do what you want to do
LIPrincess00
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
I know what I'm about to say is really difficult to do, but trust me (I am getting almost the same thing as you from my FSIL) when I tell you that when someone says or does something about what you are doing. I have been yessing them to death, curse them in my mind only and walk away. I decided I am not going to let anyone ruin this time for me. Why say anything to them, if they thought they were saying or doing something wrong in the first place they would have kept their mouths shut. I hope this helps, I know so far its worked for me. Good Luck.
Scooby319
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
Thanks girls...
Scooby319
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
I agree. it is very hard sometimes to keep my mouth shut and walk away but I have been doing it. But it piling on top of everything is helping either.
Nora101004
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
Vent away. If she is so concerned with saving money, let her Bo-K be carnations and your mom's be roses. My sis MIL didnt' do anything for pay for anything for her wed, she got daisies. My mom did a lot she got roses.
Bride2be03
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
this is sounds exactly to the T of my FMIL. I cannot stand her and she does the same exact thing. She has a nasty answer for everything we do for this wedding. Anything we try to say to her about anybody in the family, she will always take the other side of the other person, no matter what
wenndypoo
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
Diana. Deep breath........ big glass of wine...... and vent vent vent! We don't mind!
Scooby319
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
HAHA Nora that is exactly what we did. Her cosage is the carnations. She wanted them she got them. But thanks for the support, you girls are great.
Fran M
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
I had a very simple reply to any comment made by people who had no right to comment.
Look them right in the eye and Firmly say 'NO We are NOT Doing That'. I only said it once if the person persisted I ignored them. They got the message.
Julybaby
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
DH's grandmother was like you FMIL and no one told her about anything related to the wedding. She always had a negative comment. She would ask if she could talk about the wedding during inappropriate times, like in the middle of Passover seder and during the only shiva call we had for DH's other grandmother. If you can tell your FMIL very little about the wedding, she will only complain about how no one is telling her about the wedding. Your FI should also talk with his mother and let her know that she doesn't have to approve of everything you guys choose to do and that she should not comment negatively about your wedding planning. Don't let this one person make your wedding planning miserable.
JCbride2B
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
i am starting to think its the FILs jobs to be royal pains in the *sses. hang in there. let it go in one ear and out the other. i have been keeping my mouth shut about all details since all i hear are nasty or catty remarks. if i do mention something and they start to b*tch, i flat out tell them 'well i dont really care cause its my wedding so i get to do it my way'... trick is I say it in a funny voice with a funny face so it makes light of me telling the to shut the h*ll up! honestly, i vent to my family a lot and my sisters help me make light of situation by cursing them out with me or saying how our family is more tasteful, attractive, we smell better, whatever to get a laugh out of it. so vent away, hear and at home. it helps.
ThreeTwenty
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Re: Please allow me to vent ..before I lose my MIND!!
