My best friend and I get together last night for dinner and drinks...I haven't seen her in two weeks (just came back from vacation). She was venting to me about her love life and I need your opinion and advice.
She and this guy that she works with got together and hook up....They know each other for a long time. She and him kiss and fool around. But the problem is my friend is really into him...She brought him dinner, hang out with him when she's on her break...He kiss her and other things but when his coworker or other women are around he completely ignore her and doesn't pay her any attention....Forgot to mention he has a child and baby mom's drama is always a problem with him.
Is he into her just for u noe....or he does like her too and wants to get to know her but is scared to be involved with someone. Please help...I don't know how to explain to her and I told her if I was her, I would kick him to the curb a long time ago...My friend is so into him.....It's not even funny! Help please...! Tell me what I should tell her.
debzy
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
honestly, i think this guy is into your best friend simply for the physical aspect of their 'relationship.'
if he was truly into her, he would let her know it - and wouldn't care who was around. he would also be 'dating her', not just fooling around with her.
i don't know if you can help your friend realize this, but you can at least be there for her. the best advice is that she should not sleep with a guy until they are actually dating, had 'the talk', and are exclusive with each other. then she can protect herself from becoming emotionally attached to someone who is 'just not that into her'...
Maria31
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
Tell your friend to get rid of him! If he was really into her, he'd want the world to know that they were together.. not try and hide it when other women are around. I would buy her the book 'He's Just Not That Into You'... that will make her realize that this isn't a 'relationship'.
debzy
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
Posted by Maria31
Tell your friend to get rid of him! If he was really into her, he'd want the world to know that they were together.. not try and hide it when other women are around. I would buy her the book 'He's Just Not That Into You'... that will make her realize that this isn't a 'relationship'.
I was going to recommend that book, too!
MrsCastanedain09
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
Sometimes people have to learn the hard way. It hurts because this is your friend who you obviously love...but you can't drill anything into anyone.
Tell her you love her and you want someone who is worthy of her. Also, remind her to PLEASE protect herself.
jtgarsik
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
imo he likes that he's gettin' some w/no strings attached...HOWEVER - i always give people the benefit of the doubt. tell her to STOP hooking up w/him. To give him a big fat NO unless they become an item(no matter how hard it is for her) & then see if he still hangs around..hopefully he'll pursue her, if not then she knows what he really wants. either way, there ur answer will be but she'll never know what he's after unless she stops givin' him what he wants.
jtgarsik
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
in TOTAL agreement with the above posters!
rocketsummer17
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
its really just sounds like he is using her...Plus this guy seems to have alot of baggage, does your friend really want to be involved in baby mama drama?
Espo22
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
It seems like he is looking more for a friend with benefits. Also tell her to stop buying him dinner and stop seeing him whenever she has a break. She is putting way too much into this when he is not. Many times a guy will be interested in the beginning but when a girl comes on too strong like this, they lose interest. Sometimes for a guy its like a game and once the chase is over their interest is over too. That beginning time is very crucial and yes the same guy can fall for a girl immediately but sometimes it takes them a little while to see what she is like and how they get along. If the girl is too into him and all over him then they dont like it.
Tell her to stop showing all that interest, dont go see him when she has a break, wait for him to call and for her not to call him, thats if this is happening and she mostly calls. Let him take her out to dinner. This will be the test and how she will know. If she doesnt call him, will he be the one to immediately call her? if not then she will know that he is not really interested. If she doesnt make plans with him and takes him to dinner or goes out of her way to see him, will he be the one who misses her and makes plans with her and make the effort? if not then again she will get her answer.
MrsGRod09
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
He may also not want to show his affections for her around their coworkers because he may be afraid that their business may get around the office and people will start to talk or maybe it is against company policy to date a coworker and he doesn't want to get caught. We also have to keep these things in mind before judging.
elysemichelle
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Re: Please read.....Need opinion and advice
Posted by debzy
Posted by Maria31
Tell your friend to get rid of him! If he was really into her, he'd want the world to know that they were together.. not try and hide it when other women are around. I would buy her the book 'He's Just Not That Into You'... that will make her realize that this isn't a 'relationship'.