I am amazed at the fact that people who have RSVP'd haven't sent a card or gift. I say this because there are plenty of events FH and I can't make it to because we work on the weekends and ALWAYS sent a nice gift, card, or money (usually money). We have recv'd a few no's and we get nothing....a few of these people have recv'd some very nice absentee gifts from us. I always thought that was proper etiquette...am I wrong?
PreshusSmurf
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
It is proper etiquette ....
We only got gifts from a very very small handful of our 'no' RSVPs.
mrspalomino148
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
I thought this too... A few of our guests who declined did send us a check, but most of them didn't. I was under the impression that you always would send a gift, especially to family.
tiff940
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
Only one regret sent me a gift so far...we will see if anymore do.
Papillon25
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
only a few, one was very small (not a complaint, better than nothing )
Hoping for some more after the wedding?
bemyyoko
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
i only received 2 no's so far... neither sent a gift. i didn't know that people sent gifts if they didn't attend, b/c i've never declined an invite so i've never been in that position.
we also had RSVP postcards...so people couldn't send anything WITH the rsvp... so i'm not sure what to expect really.
if you have gotten gifts from 'regrets' rsvps...do they send it with the rsvp or in another card/package?
missliss
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
We always send a check back with our No RSVPs if we can't attend. But we only received 3 checks with all of our no's. I'm not complaining so much as I'm surprised. Cause like I said, it's something that we've always done, so I guess I assumed that everyone else did as well. Guess we were wrong....
bluegreen08
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
i didn't vote since we didn't send out wedding invites yet but we did have an e-party.
we got gifts from virtually all of our 'adult' NOs for our e-party. We got gifts from about half of our friends who couldn't come. We didn't get gifts from 2 people in our bridal party (one who came, one who did not).
MissMath
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
Posted by 040508Bride
I am amazed at the fact that people who have RSVP'd haven't sent a card or gift. I say this because there are plenty of events FH and I can't make it to because we work on the weekends and ALWAYS sent a nice gift, card, or money (usually money). We have recv'd a few no's and we get nothing....a few of these people have recv'd some very nice absentee gifts from us. I always thought that was proper etiquette...am I wrong?
Some nos sent gifts. The others are older family members who will send gifts with their children or liek they did with my sister send it closer to the wedding or after it.
GinaZ
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
we have gotten two. I think a lot of the people intend to send a gift closer to our wedding date or are sending it down with friends. Most of our No's are OOT.
Michiamanomimi
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
I just looked at my RSVP and gift lists and I'm at about 75% didn't send something and 25% did. The ones who didn't send gifts were more likely to be OOT or our friends. No one sent a check with their RSVP, but a couple of gifts came shortly after.
Rejjie
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
I didn't know you were supposed to send a regret gift until I started planning my wedding. Now I feel bad and want to go back and give everyone gifts that I never did...but that's weird. I also feel guilty for not giving better gifts. Oh well....live an learn. I'll be thankful for any gifts, but expect none.
Jenn04
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
Are your no's from out of state? I have a feeling that non-NYers dont get the regret gift.
I always send a regret gift of at least $100 to the weddings I couldnt go to! I dont know who taught me this but it feels like I always knews it!
BTW...we have 80% guest out of town....many cannot make it...I am curious to see how many send a gift! I am curious to see how many actually give a monetary gift...and how much! I know its kind of rude to say all this but I have no idea how OOT gift giving goes!
mRm2008
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
According to 'Etiquette and Advice from the Emily Post Institute' Guests invited to the wedding have an obligation to send a gift, whether they are attending or not. There are few exceptions. If you live far away from where the wedding will take place and have been out of touch with the couple for several years, and are not planning to attend the wedding, there's no need to send a gift. Also, the receipt of a wedding announcement after the wedding carries no gift obligation, although it's thoughtful to send the couple a note or card expressing your 'best wishes.'
Regardless of where a person is from, I think some people just don't put it together in their heads to send a gift if they are not attending. I've always sent a cash gift or g/c if I couldn't attend.
roan126
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
I would never even consider not sending a gift for a wedding, whether I could make it or not. I guess not everyone thinks that way. This is good info; I guess I wont be surprised now when we get no's without gifts.
LauraD419
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
We got gifts from some of our 'no' people but not all of them. If I were replying no, I would probably wait until closer to the wedding to send the gift. We did get some right away, but I do not expect them from all of our 'no's'
040508Bride
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
BUMPING bc I never got to respond to some of the questions....
Most of our No's are from DF side....they live out of state, but it's NJ....it's not like it's 'that' far away.....some had prior commitments an some are FILS friends....some are his family members (an uncle for instance)....
There have been SEVERAL events that we have not been able to atten bc of work schedules or prior commitments and we have 100% of the time sent a gift if not with an RSVP, seperately all together or with our other relatives who have attended. I always thought this was proper etiquette.
I asked my sister about her wedding and she sai about 10% of her No's sent a gift.
ChristineAaron08
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
I think they should have sent something if you had sent them a gift....maybe they are waiting until the wedding?
I heard somewhere (I think in Milionaire game show) that they have a year to send a gift.
But still- if you sent them one immediately you would think they would send you one.
We havent received any either for our NOs
futuremrsfab
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Re: POLL FOR GIRLS WHO SENT INVITES ALREADY
We have always sent a regret gift- but I treated it like the wedding- you have up to a year to send it to the couple and most times, I sent it after the wedding- so maybe more will come after you get married
