Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Mishy626 Posted: Jan 30, 2003 12:10 PM

Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

My FH and I are getting married April 25 and are having an interfaith ceremony (we are still in the process of finding a rabbi). We are planning on going this weekend to buy our wedding bands, but I have heard that some rabbi's will not perform the ceremony if the ring for my FH is not gold. Is this true? My FH originally was thinking of having a gold and white gold band.... this wouldn't work would it? Please help with any suggestions! Thanks.

Misty Posted: Jan 30, 2003 12:11 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

You are permitted to use any precious metal...gold, platinum, or white gold, but there can't be any adornments, meaning diamonds, or cuts.

Edited to add: I think you will be able to use the gold and white gold band....

LisaW Posted: Jan 30, 2003 12:20 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

We got married with plain platinum bands

abc7077 Posted: Jan 30, 2003 02:04 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

I got married in a plain platinum band and my husband in a plain gold band. The only thing my rabbi insisted on was that there were no diamonds anywhere on my hands that night!!!

alina Posted: Jan 30, 2003 02:05 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Mishy, our rabbi did not mention it, and I would think that most rabbi's marrying interfaith couples will not worry about such things.

LaurenS Posted: Jan 30, 2003 02:19 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

We both used plain platinum bands to get married in. If we wanted to we could have used gold, the only restriction was that there couldn't be anything that breaks the circle of the ring (like diamonds or etching) But I agree with Alina, most Rabbi's or Cantor's that are preforming an interfaith ceremony will not be as strict. My friend got married in her eternity band during her interfaith ceremony.

Valenia Posted: Jan 30, 2003 04:34 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

And I got married during my full jewish ceremony with a platinum ring with diamonds. Only way to know is to talk to the rabbi!

msmeanie1 Posted: Jan 30, 2003 05:23 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Each rabbi has different requirements. Our Cantor asked us to have solid bands with no stones or cuts, however two two was fine. We will have the clergy bless our other rings.

Helene718 Posted: Jan 30, 2003 06:05 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Just curious. . . why can't you have stones on it?

alina Posted: Jan 30, 2003 06:16 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

No stones b/c then you're interrupting the eternity band of the marriage, or something of that sort.

If you have the stones, they interrupt the full circle that the band otherwise would make.

Mishy626 Posted: Jan 31, 2003 11:49 AM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Thanks ladies, I think we are going to put off ring shopping until we find a rabbi and can ask him what he prefers. Thanks for all your help.

Valenia Posted: Jan 31, 2003 12:09 PM

Re: Question for Jewish brides from a non-Jewish bride (about wedding rings)

Mishy, I would also suggest talking to your husband about what is meaningful to both of you before accomodating the 'rules' of a particular rabbi. You will be able to find someone who will perform the ceremony according to your values. My comments would be different if there was a family rabbi who was important to both of you, but if you are 'shopping around' for a rabbi, then what you both believe in matters most in my opinion!