just when i thought we're done with the entourage! gaaahh
So here's the thing: i realized i dont want the RB to be our RB! he's FI's nephew and we both barely see him. I've always wanted everyone in my entourage to be someone who is either close to me or FI and that kid (nor his parents) is not. Why did we choose him then? Bec he's the only nephew we have that can walk.
Honestly, i would rather have my 13 yo bro to be the RB or none at all. Ive talked to him about being an RB & he doesnt mind.
Sigh. I'm at a loss! What to do?!?
(Btw, we havent asked FI's nephews parents that we're considering their child yet)
Dramatica
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
do what you want honestly.. putting someone in just to follow due process usually doesn't end well
heck I don't have any FG options ..I'm about to pull Madonna and adopt some Malawian kid I'm joking of course..or am I?
pipermaru
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
do you NEED to have an RB? we're not..
Taunita
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
Hey! If you haven’t asked your potential RB or even mentioned it to his mother, I’d say go with your brother. There are no set rules to a wedding other than the commitment you are making to your FH. Everyone’s wedding is unique and personal and having your brother involved will mean much more to you especially when creating a picturesque memory on your wedding day. Looking back you probably will much rather remember your brother rather than settling on some sort of “standard”. The rings are a symbol of your love and commitment to FH and who better to carry out the task than your brother (an important male presence in your life).
If your FI doesn’t have any sort of attachment to the idea of his nephew as the RB – choose your brother. The nephew may be the only one that can walk but you don’t really talk – and if you’ve always wanted someone close to you in your entourage he would be the odd man out to no fault of his own and potentially cause resentment down the line. If you realized these feelings now, honestly you shouldn’t even consider nephew especially when you have someone as close to you as your brother as a potential contender. Hope this helps.
SimHawk8
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
I'm not doing a RB or a FG. We aren't really close to any children.
AshnJess110610
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
In my opinion I just wouldn't have one. You shouldn't have to pick someone just for the sake of picking them. And if you want your brother in the wedding party I'd make him a jr groomsmen. 13 is a little old to be a ring bearer in my opinion.
MikesBride2B
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
Posted by AshnJess110610
In my opinion I just wouldn't have one. You shouldn't have to pick someone just for the sake of picking them. And if you want your brother in the wedding party I'd make him a jr groomsmen. 13 is a little old to be a ring bearer in my opinion.
ITA
allornil
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
agreed. I wouldn't even have a RB then. It's not set in stone that you need one.
StellaStar13
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
Posted by Taunita
Hey! If you haven’t asked your potential RB or even mentioned it to his mother, I’d say go with your brother. There are no set rules to a wedding other than the commitment you are making to your FH. Everyone’s wedding is unique and personal and having your brother involved will mean much more to you especially when creating a picturesque memory on your wedding day. Looking back you probably will much rather remember your brother rather than settling on some sort of “standard”. The rings are a symbol of your love and commitment to FH and who better to carry out the task than your brother (an important male presence in your life).
If your FI doesn’t have any sort of attachment to the idea of his nephew as the RB – choose your brother. The nephew may be the only one that can walk but you don’t really talk – and if you’ve always wanted someone close to you in your entourage he would be the odd man out to no fault of his own and potentially cause resentment down the line. If you realized these feelings now, honestly you shouldn’t even consider nephew especially when you have someone as close to you as your brother as a potential contender. Hope this helps.
ITA!
FutureJOC
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
I'd say if you haven't even asked this little guy's parents for him to be the RB than don't even bring it up to them. It's honestly fine to just not have an RB at all - there's nothing in rule book that says you have to have one.
And if you've already mentioned it to your brother and he's fine with doing it, than have him do it.
halfbaked
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
We're not having one. I'd just skip it if I were you. I did consider my little cousin who is about 10/11, but I felt that's a little old and his brother who is 14 would probably feel left out.
Cacarina
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
Just don't have one. But seriously, 13 is WAYYY too old for a ring bearer.
MrsBlueRibbon
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Re: RB Dilemma. Aaarghh
Posted by MikesBride2B
Posted by AshnJess110610
In my opinion I just wouldn't have one. You shouldn't have to pick someone just for the sake of picking them. And if you want your brother in the wedding party I'd make him a jr groomsmen. 13 is a little old to be a ring bearer in my opinion.
ITA
ITA and also remember it is you and FH's wedding, so do what you feel is right for you!
