RD dilemma...need opinions

My church is out in the Smithtown area. About half of people who will be attending the RD is from southwest suffolk.

My FMIL called me to say that she started looking for places and suggested some really nice restaurants but they are on the south shore on the water. She said she wants something with a nice view. That's fine and I totally appreciate her efforts, but my RD is at night in November. The bigger issue is to get to these restaurants is an easy 30-40 minute ride from the church.

I think the dinner should be closer to the church. I think it's a lot to ask people to drive all the way out to the church and then another 30 minutes for dinner. FH does not see what the big deal is, considering the restaurants she is considering would bring half the people closer to home anyway.

I totally appreciate that she is looking at really nice places for the RD and I'm not trying to be a brat. We are not paying for it so we don't have a say at all, but we can certainly make suggestions.

What do you think? Also, can you make any recommendations that can accomodate 50-60 people in the Smithtown area?

even though they are paying, IMO you should have some sort of say-but besides that, I agree- it would be better if the RD was closer to the church- or at least in the middle, so people won't have to drive much more.
We got married in smithtown-at st. patricks and our RD was at San marco in Hauppauge- they did a fantastic job and I highly recommend them, ALTHOUGH, we did not have as many people as you are, so it might not be a good fit...
if it is at night and in NOV. you don't really 'need' a view

other places in the area:
Pomodorinos in Hauppauge
Garden Grill in Smithtown
watermill in smithtown has a small room perfect for a RD
A bunch of nice places in St. James

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Posted by BlushingBride714

I don't understand your FMIL thinking on this - I am assuming that your rehearsal dinner will be in the evening prob around 7pm or so. If that's the case, and it's in November, you won't be able to see anything anyway because it will be DARK by then. Unless she is planning on having a very early dinner or a rehearsal luncheon. Maybe you should bring up that point to her.

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Or if FH could do it and make me look like less of a PITA, that would be great too! Fat chance!

The RD will definitely be at night so I'm not really too sure what view she is anticipating either...it's not like it will be a nice summer night for everyone to enjoy the deck.

I'm just happy she took the initiative to do this so I certainly don't want to discourage her. I would just like to give her options closer to the church but my biggest issue is what can hold that many people in that area.

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Posted by thelastresort

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Posted by BlushingBride714

I don't understand your FMIL thinking on this - I am assuming that your rehearsal dinner will be in the evening prob around 7pm or so. If that's the case, and it's in November, you won't be able to see anything anyway because it will be DARK by then. Unless she is planning on having a very early dinner or a rehearsal luncheon. Maybe you should bring up that point to her.

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Or if FH could do it and make me look like less of a PITA, that would be great too! Fat chance!

The RD will definitely be at night so I'm not really too sure what view she is anticipating either...it's not like it will be a nice summer night for everyone to enjoy the deck.

I'm just happy she took the initiative to do this so I certainly don't want to discourage her. I would just like to give her options closer to the church but my biggest issue is what can hold that many people in that area.

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don't worry about that, there are plenty of places--
I mentioned a few above-

also, Oscars in st james

villa sorrento in hmmm I think stmithtown/lake grove/st. james- I don't know it's close to smithtown though...