Me and My fiance became engaged Feb of 2004 and his close cousin(and best man) popped the question in Oct of 2004. Mind you we have set the date and have teh church. We has a certain hall in mind, but we are saving the money right now to put a Down payment on. Then his cousin and his now fiance decided they wanted a june wedding but since we had the month they chose two months before us, even though they said at first they were going to have it in Dec because she feels her grandmother won't make it. Fine we got over that. Then they asked us were we were looking and we said our place, and a few weeks down the line they questioned it again and we had funny feelings so we said we already placed a downpayment. Come to find out yesterday they went back to the same place and placed a downpayment for the same location two months prior to our wedding. Any advice how to deal without me losing my voice and cool?
sarahthegreat
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Re: relatives to be problem
to me its just them being immature and stupid. my advice - keep all your wedding ideas to yourself. don't discuss it with anyone that you know will tell your cousin what your plans are. it sux, but find a different hall. your wedding is about you and your fh, not anyone else.
Thumballina
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Re: relatives to be problem
Posted by smm2675
to me its just them being immature and stupid. my advice - keep all your wedding ideas to yourself. don't discuss it with anyone that you know will tell your cousin what your plans are. it sux, but find a different hall. your wedding is about you and your fh, not anyone else.
I agree...don't let any of them no anything about your plans...just talk to us about them
gNi1125
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Re: relatives to be problem
I don't think I would find a diff hall. If you have your heart set on it then why should you change your location. Honestly each wedding is unique anyway. Best of Luck to you. Don't let them rain on your parade and mums on the wedding talk around them.
Soon2bMrsRivera
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Re: relatives to be problem
I have been withholding information from anyone unless I know I can trust them. I hate that I have to be so quiet but I guess I can blow them away with everything when it is all said and done. I know it might sound childish but I am happy they place a downpayment and now they are locked in and we can reluctantly choose an alternate location. This is suppose to be a joyful time and I just seem to keep getting pissed off by his cousins fiance
gNi1125
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Re: relatives to be problem
Sorry to hear that. Trust me I know what you are going through. Hope everything works out.
babslovesjoey
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Re: relatives to be problem
ughhh how annoying, this is supposed to be your time to shine and I feel like they are trying to steal your thunder! I wouldn't tell that bride anymore of your wedding planning and keep it to yourself and make sure no one else tells them either, like your FH. I would wait and save a little bit more money and find a place that is nicer and better, or add something extra that she doesn't have at her wedding, that everyone can rave about, and its better if she has her wedding before yours, because then you can see what she did wrong and make sure you don't do the same and add something to make it better or more unique!!! ugh she is making me soo annoyed, and I don't even know her!
Soon2bMrsRivera
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Re: relatives to be problem
Thank You, What stinks as well is his cousin is his bestman and my fiance is one of his groomsmen. Meaning while we are paying for our own (no help from family) wedding we have to pay for tux and a gift for his cousins wedding two months before ours. How can his cousin think about being a good bestman to his cousin(my fiance) while planning his own wedding.
Soon2bMrsRivera
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Re: relatives to be problem
UHH someone who feels my pain! I was raged when my fiance told me yesterday, and he wants to tell his cousin he donesn't want him in the wedding and he doesn't want to be in his. Which I don't want to tear them apart they are very close I just wish his cousin would grow a lil confidence and say something to his bride to be like this is not right, he has said it is wrong to my FH. But my FH is now lips sealed with all our plans.
cantwait2bewed
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Re: relatives to be problem
Wow that is so shady. Pick another place if you can. And dont tell her anything.
KandM2006
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Re: relatives to be problem
Wanna hear what the great thing about this is? You get to see EVERYTHING that went wrong or wasn't great at THEIR wedding and then you can MAKE SURE YOUR wedding is FANTASTIC! Don't mean to sound petty but you gotta look at the bright side!! Good Luck!
LuckyMe
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Re: relatives to be problem
Don't worry like the other girls said keep all your plans to yourself and tell them it's a surprise and your not telling anyone anything until everything is set in stone! Keep the hall you want and just add your special touches. Im planning my wedding for 2006 and my brother is getting married this year. I don't really speak to FSIL(personal issues)so I knew nothing of her plans and during one phone conversation I found out that not only was she using the same florist but looking at the same dj and the same type of pkgs. So I shut my mouth about the rest of our plans and deceided to find a different dj but keep my appt. with the same florist because I love their work.
7706bride
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Re: relatives to be problem
Believe me, i understand what you are going through and feel so bad. I am surpirsed you kept your cool for this long. But try to listen to what everyone on here is telling you. I would change the place (i think). Find something even better, unless you will be broken hearted. Are a lot of the same people going to be at the wedding? I know how it is. It is hard for us 06 girls b/c a lot of people are still getting engaged (after us) and booking dates before. So it gets difficult to share your plans with others. If you need to talk i am here!
cmastro25
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Re: relatives to be problem
Posted by KandM2006
Wanna hear what the great thing about this is? You get to see EVERYTHING that went wrong or wasn't great at THEIR wedding and then you can MAKE SURE YOUR wedding is FANTASTIC! Don't mean to sound petty but you gotta look at the bright side!! Good Luck!
I totally agree with this. Plan your wedding, don't tell them any more details, have fun. Come her wedding, you'll get a look into how things are down at the hall and you'll probably be fresh in the Halls mind so they'll treat you even better. So, in the end, you'll have a better day and be the bigger person.
hmpena
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Re: relatives to be problem
I agree with what everyone else is saying. Discuss your plans only with those you trust. You are going to have a wonderful wedding no matter where it is! If you really have your heart set on the same hall, then go with it. I agree with KandM2006- you'll get to see everything that goes wrong and make sure you do it better! Honestly, your day should be special and no one should take that away from you. Look at other places if you want. You may find out that the place have been wanting really isn't for you! I thought I wanted Milleridge Inn for months. When I went to look at Fox Hollow, I loved it and knew it was the one! Good luck!
salsbride06
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Re: relatives to be problem
to me that is being very immature......it seems as if they are trying to prove something.....but what i do not know. if i were you i would go ahead and plan your wedding and dont give out any more information to them so they cant get any ideas!!!! that is the best advice that i can give you. maybe you and your fh can sit down with the both of them and talk about how you feel. i know that you it may seem unfair about what they are doing. hugs to you and hope things work out ok
Soon2bMrsRivera
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Re: relatives to be problem
Thank you to everyone who helped me out, it is much appreciated. I think I will take a look at other halls and learn from their mistakes. And since there will be all the same relatives they won't even be able to compare. All plans hush hush!
