Repost from '07 Board-Housing Situation

shopaholic07 Posted: Nov 01, 2006 11:43 AM

Repost from '07 Board-Housing Situation

Hi,

I originally posted this on the '07 board yesterday....thought I would also post it on here to reach a bigger audience.....

Here's my dilemma......my fiance and his parents purchased a home together just a few months before I met him. He lives there now and I will move in next year.

I've told him that he should not expect me to contribute towards the mortgage payments or repairs since I do not have a interest in the property. I've offered to contribute some of my savings towards the house if I am put on the deed. He rejected this.

I don't feel 'right' living somewhere where I am not contributing anything--I feel like I'm freeloading!- but then again, I am not an owner. I feel that as a couple, we should have something that is 'ours'. I would feel like an outsider living in that house.

Do I have any rights to the property since he acquired it before I met him? Is anyone in a similar situation?

One more thing....FH insists that we call the place 'our' house. If I refer to it as his, he corrects me. Isn't it like adding insult to injury (or whatever that saying is)?

ms.j Posted: Nov 01, 2006 12:46 PM

Re: Repost from '07 Board-Housing Situation

I have to say that I am in the same situation, but it is reversed! I own my house with my father as an investment. My father has been generous enough to help his daughters put down payments on their homes so he knows that when he is gone, they will have something that is always theirs, that no one can take away. I think it is a comfort thing for him. I know my DH isn't exactly thrilled with the situation, but right now he is getting his MBA and can't contribute to the mortgage, but when he graduates he will be paying for part of the mortgage. When he complained that his name is not on the deed, I told him to either pay my father back the amount of the down payment or ask his parents to do the same as my father. I know that sounds really cold! Hopefully, we can buy another home and use the present as rental property. Maybe you can contribute to furnishing the house...that is what DH is doing.

shopaholic07 Posted: Nov 01, 2006 01:23 PM

Re: Repost from '07 Board-Housing Situation

Thanks for your reply.

Do you think it is fair to ask your DH to contribute to the mortgage at all since the deed doesn't even have his name?

At least you gave him the option to contribute towards the amount of the down payment---when I told my fiance I would contribute $ from my savings, he didn't accept it.

MandG072909 Posted: Nov 01, 2006 01:32 PM

Re: Repost from '07 Board-Housing Situation

I'm in a similar situation...DH owns a condo...he bought it for us to move in together (he and his family is dead set against the concept of renting) but I've always been a renter so I didn't have any $ to contibute to the downpayment. His parents gave him a bunch of $ and his and his mom's names are on the deed. I do however pay 1/2 of the mortgage every month...I look at as the equivilent of if I were still renting...I'd have to pay something to someone wherever I lived so why not have it be my husband...if I can ever come up with the match to what he put down as the downpayment I'll put it in and we'll change the deed ro both of our names but more likely than that we'll buy something else, use our wedding $ as the downpayment and he'll keep this as a rental (he has no 401K so he looks at it as his retirement fund)...or even more likely than that we'll end up selling this place, put all the $ into our new home and it won't have mattered anyway...