RSVP Etiquette?

My family is splitting the cost of the wedding 50/50 with FH's family. That being the case, how would we handle rsvps -- who would they go to?

Logically, I think they should go to my dad because he's got a mailslot which can hold all the mail in the world (vs. FH's parents who have a tiny apartment mailbox). And, my dad is much more organized and can easily keep a pile of cards and just give them to me to track. FH's family is incredibly disorganized and I'm nervous they'll lose RSVPs (and they admit they are disorganized.)

But logic can be thrown out the door when it comes to my future MIL because she's nuts and truly wants as much attention as possible.

So what is proper ettiquette? I think that would be that rsvps go to the bride's side, right? I need as much as possible to convince her to let the rsvps go to my dad. telling her that it will be easier for me to track and stay organized won't be a good enough answer for her.

HELP!

IF we had already closed on our house when we ordered our invites, the RSVPs would have come directly to us. After discussing the option to have them go to my father or to my IL's we decided to have them go to DH's condo. So they were actually addressed to him.

ETA: I don't think there is any real ettiquette when it comes to the RSVPs. I would think it would be easier for you to manage if they came to you.

Completely based on the whole disorganization aspect for your post - have them sent to your house/dad's house.

Forget etiquette...

I too, have a small, apartment mailbox. If I lived in a house, I would absolutely have them come to me.

What should I do?

As many of you have seen from my posts, FMIL has made this entire experience downright awful for me.

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Posted by suven

In this case, proper etiquette would be for the RSVPs to go to your mother or father.

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I agree, even though DH and I lived in a house together when invites went out, they still went to my mom's house. And both parents contributed to the wedding. It's all about etiquiette in this case.....

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Posted by JandJ1224

I don't fully understand this concept. Why wouldn't RSVP's go to you?? You are the one who is getting married and you are most likely making the seating charts ect. right?

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I was going to say this

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Posted by robynlevy

I too, have a small, apartment mailbox. If I lived in a house, I would absolutely have them come to me.

What should I do?

As many of you have seen from my posts, FMIL has made this entire experience downright awful for me.

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You're not going to get so many in one day that they wouldn't fit. Don't sweat it, and have them sent to you.

If you decide against that, have it go to your dad's and just tell them that you ruled out them for the same reason you ruled yourself out-the mailbox size.