save me girls, before i go off the deep end.... (long)

ok, i am totally not stressed about the wedding until i talk to my mother!! Then I get so mad so quickly and i turn bright red!!!!!

Long story short-- our wedding (close family only) is in italy, traditional reception here on LI when we return.

I think my parents are still in denial that my WEDDING is in italy, and my RECEPTION -- say it with me, REE-CEP-SHUNNNN -- is NOT my wedding day!!! Any time wedding is mentioned, they only talk about the reception, and italy is always the afterthought!

Since FI and are paying for all of italy wedding (including a very high-end photographer) and a huge chunk of the reception, my mom **insisted** on paying for my dress and **offered** to get aphotographer for the reception. I dont feel it is 100% necessary since we'll have italy photos of our actual wedding DAY, and I could hear her eyes rolling through the telephone!!! But if she wants to make the offer, fine, mucho appreciated! So I said I need to know what your budget is, so when I call I can tell the photographers the price range. Her answer, 'I don't know.' SO I tell her I need to know a price range cause how am I gonna know how the hel to negotiate with them if i dont have a budget? 'Well i can't tell you how much.' Um OK. Then she lectures me about how she is paying for my dress you know, and she doesn't make a lot of money you know.. and I went off! She insisted on buying that dress!!!

Ughghghgh.. sorry for this vent that seems to make no sense but it made me feel better to get it out. Why do the parents we love so much rear their freaky heads during this process? anyone? anyone?

thanks moechick!!! i'm so glad i'm normal LOL i try to let it roll off my back but i have a fire that fuels REAL EASY

i don't need a duraflame log to get going

Oh my GOD, that's annoying! Both of your mothers sound like this wedding thing is driving them a bit crazy. My grandmother, who's the sweetest person in the world, is becoming Grandmazilla, I swear. 'That's too dark for May' 'That's horrible material, that's not white!' 'You can't wear satin in the summer, that's for winter, people are gonna talk about your mother (who's making my dress)'

Anyway, I got satin.

Point is, weddings make people stupid.

Nadine

Your mom has been looking forward to your wedding for your whole life, and she probably wants what she thinks will be a perfect wedding. Maybe she thinks that to other people this will be the wedding day since they won't be in Italy. I don't really have advice, except to try to accept the fact that your mom loves you and is trying to make your day special (maybe for both of you). Good luck.

to all of you....weddings make people crazy!!
my mother spent a month looking for a dress for my wedding - drageed me with her to like 10 stores (we went to 3 for my dress......) and too the longest time trying to pick one out....and was acting like everyone is going to be staring at her all day long! not to sound obnoxious...but um, isn't it my wedding?
but i love her and i know she was concerned about pictures and whatnot....she just drives me crazy!
and then my dad acted all surprised and hurt the other day when i mentioned that tom and i will be living together for one to two months before we get married....he acted like it was a major deal! (let me tell you know thta this is the man who offered his babysitting services to us the day after we were engaged )
wedding = insanity
aren't they fun?

Lori - as your HOH (hahahahahaaa) I totally understand. Mom's get freaky during this time. How many times did I vent to you about my mom?

Just brush it off and look at the big picture - you're having the most amazing wedding and that day they'll be so happy you won't hear a peep out of them so they need to drive you crazy now

My mom drives me crazy at times also. Luckily I live in Chicago, cuz I can just tell her I need to get off the phone when she gets on my nerves.

She has even told me that this is the wedding that didnt get to plan. My grandmother planned her whole wedding, which turned out to be a zoo with 700 people.

When anyone begins to aggrevate me, I get really quite and count to 20. When they realize that I am quite they tend to get the picture

I know exactly what you mean...but, I can understand how she might want a photographer at the reception--you may want to get fun candid shots of people dancing, stuff like that, in addition to anything that you've already taken when saying your vows.

Maybe you can go to her with a couple of package prices and ask her if they are what she had in mind. You probably don't need as big of a package as most brides get. Try Duet and 12th Night. Both specialize in candid, photojournalism type photography and both are pretty reasonable. You wont' need albums, various prints. etc..

Good luck!!

smile and breathe. smile and breathe....