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Second Thoughts?

09 bride Posted:

Second Thoughts?

Anyone ever have any second thoughts? If so, how do you get through it?

PoppedInASnap Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

I havnt had any. Ive only had the 'What if he leaves me' thoughts.
do you know why your having them? could be something simple.

09 bride Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

fighting over how we are going to pay for the wedding, he's just being very stubburn and i dont know if i can deal with this for the rest of my life

FuTuRe MrS MaZz Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

i had 2nd thoughts immediately after he proposed and i said yes... right away i thought 'omg.. this is it... for the rest of my life... no turning back...' and i think i hyperventilated

fh had 2nd thoughts a few weeks back, but you talk it out... see whats really bothering you.. work through it.... im sure it happens to all the brides at least once during the engagement!
09 bride Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

i just cant beleive its happening so soon. we fight a lot, and i've had the last straw. i dont know what to do

PoppedInASnap Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Posted by 09 bride

fighting over how we are going to pay for the wedding, he's just being very stubburn and i dont know if i can deal with this for the rest of my life


just look at it this way

the wedding is only one day. The marriage is the rest of your life. dont let the planning of one day set the tone for the rest of your life you know?

plus look at it this way... all the pictures show is smiles and happiness... thats all that matters
JKFris09 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

give yourselves time to adjust and work through this...it's never going to be easy and perfect like it movies, you'll always have to work at it.

coley1027 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

ive had some second thoughts to. fh is very stubborn at times, and sometimes im just like 'is this what im going to have to deal with for the rest of my life?'. but i took time to reflect on it, and i only have those thoughts when were arguing. otherwise i love him to death and couldnt picture my life without him. i wouldnt worry to much since you only feel this way since youve been arguing a lot lately. weddings can be stressful with the money and everything, and on top of it, its a life-changing decision. i say give it some time so both of you can adjust to the huge change and your second thoughts will go away!

lookitscassie Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

if the money is a problem can you push the wedding back a year? we've been thinking about it, so it can give us more time to plan and save up. just think about it. dont make any rash decisions. talk it out

CMS Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

FH and me have been together for 12 years...talk about having second thoughts during that time!!

Try and step back and see what the problem is. Are you fighting mostly about paying for the wedding? If that's the case, then consider pushing it back, or doing something on a smaller scale that won't break the bank.

Don't forget, a wedding is only a couple of hours. Try not to lose perspective of that!
little34 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Not for me....I think being together for 12 years we passed those second guessing feelings years ago. The grass is always greener but you come to find out quickly that what you have is so much better than what is out there!! We did break up for a few months 5 years ago because we thought that since we have been with each other since 10th grade we wondered if there was anything else out there...plus all of our friends kept putting that thought in our heads....like how do you know if you have only been with her....but it really didn't take us long to realize how happy we were together and that we were meant to be.

longislandlibrarian Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Give yourself some adjustment time... wedding planning is stressful especially when the bills start coming in and you have to start leaving downpayments etc.if it's just wedding stress, just take your time and work it out.. trust me you will be fine..
However, if you think there are more serious underlying issues, then you need to really have a big talk before you go further with your wedding plans.....
Just talk it through.... it's a stressful time you may just be feeling the stress and fighting because of it.

Alexandra1028 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Ive actually never had second thoughts, the only thing that scares me is his family
longislandlibrarian Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

I've never had second thoughts myself.. i just know that he is the one
It can always be scary trying to meld 2 families together... but so far I cannot complain......
kabo0831 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

no 2nd thoughts just worried about how im going to pay for the wedding

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Sure I have...it's natural to get that way. They pop up usually after a fight or during one. It passes though. Take everything one day at a time. Because remember, all you have is today. You dont know what tomorrow brings. I cant stand FH sometimes and question why I'm with him, but the good outweighs the bad and I love him for who he is.

novia26 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

I think once it get closer to the day...I'll feel nervous, but not doubtful about the whole think...just the whole 'all eyes on me' for a day freaks me out.

LegoBride Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

Since I've been with FH I've never second guessed myself - I know we were meant for each other. However, if you are having second thoughts you need to make sure of your feelings for him or if the stubborness is just showing your true feelings for him. Make sure its just money you are fighting over and if it is just money than its worth the fight if you want to spend the rest of your life with him

beram63 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

i did b4 we got engaged, but not since. in general, marriage is a little scary to me bc it's so hard to know how things will go, especially when i consider factoring a baby into the equation.

def don't let the stress of wedding planning put a damper on things, though. we had a tough spell after the proposal bc of $ and whatnot. it's not worth it and, fortunately, it passes.
crazeee18 Posted:

Re: Second Thoughts?

no second thoughts here....not yet at least lol

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