Some of you have had this epiphany already so please bear with me! Here goes:
Of course with all the recent news about bombs being found in Spain, dead Americans being dragged around, beaten, and hung from bridges, the Reublican Nat'l Convention coming to NYC and seeing footage of the bomb squads being trained while wearing gas masks and suits, i have to say... THIS IS REALLY F-ING SCARY.
While in Cali last week, I went to see a taping of the Dennis Miller show. One of the guests was a former Sec. of Defense who mentioned the nuclear bombs that are circulating and that no one talks about anymore. Dennis asked what would happen if one went off in, say, Times Square. The guy responded that everything within a 1/3 mile radius would turn to dust, and everything within a 1 mile radius would look like the Oklahoma City bombing. Needless to say, that freaked me out cause I work and live in that radius.
I mean, for all of us, just starting out... getting married.... having children.... starting the rest of our lives... I dunno I have really been thinking about it lately. FH and I pay a friggin fortune for an OK apartment in Brooklyn, but for what? To live in a death trap?! I think about having kids and raising them in this very unsafe atmosphere, and it scares me to death! I have never really felt 'unsafe' before.
BUT I firmly believe in not walking around scared either, and not being afraid of things that may or may not happen. I am leaving for my wedding/honeymoon in Italy on Sept 11 this year, and have done much air travel since 9/11/01. I ride the subway multiple times a day, I work between Penn Sta and Times Sq (supposed 'targets.') I live my life as usual.
I guess my question is... how do you all deal with this? Is it something you think about too? How do you help yourself not feel overwhelmed?
Sorry to be so serious on a Friday night but it helped me to type all that out.
Jan05Bride
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Honestly, I don't have time to write a long response so I will do the best I can with the time that I have tonight. I completely feel the same way as you do, it is extremely scary and upsetting. Unfortunately, what are the options? Move where? Where is it safe? Safer? Should we walk around with a gas mask? Should we get off every train that has someone suspicious looking on it? I'd never get on a train then! I have a friend, a teacher who works in queens, who was very upset/nervous after 9/11 and would constantly want to talk about this. After awhile I told her to please stop because I work in the middle of Manhattan, I think about it constantly and you are making me upset. I mean I really understood how she felt and I felt the same way, I was terrified that something was going to happen to me, to my family, to my loved ones, but I didn't have an option and had to still get on the subway, and work on the 21st floor of a building and walk the streets of Midtown - I had to STOP thinking about it and continue to live. I'm not saying that I did, but I stopped obsessing about it. Every now & then I do exactly what you are doing, and I begin the questioning and then slowly the 'fear' fades and things go back to some sort of 'normalcy' but it's always somewhere on the mind. You have to live your life, enjoy your life - don't let them take over your mind and your power to be who you are! I don't know if I answered your questions well or at all but I just wanted you to know that there are a lot of people who feel like you do to and it is natural to feel this way
ThongLori
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Re: serious subject, would love your thoughts! (long)
Thanks Jan05 -- i think its the Dennis Miller guy who caused all the feelings to resurface!!
Jan05Bride
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Posted by ThongLori
Thanks Jan05 -- i think its the Dennis Miller guy who caused all the feelings to resurface!!
It happens, do you think you'll ever really feel 'safe' - I mean SAFE again? It feels like yesterday! The adrenaline pumping fear has gone, but the feeling that something may happen and can happen any day is always there.
ThongLori
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Posted by Jan05Bride
Posted by ThongLori
Thanks Jan05 -- i think its the Dennis Miller guy who caused all the feelings to resurface!!
It happens, do you think you'll ever really feel 'safe' - I mean SAFE again? It feels like yesterday! The adrenaline pumping fear has gone, but the feeling that something may happen and can happen any day is always there.
I agree! I feel what you're saying totally. It's not like I'm the basement with my flashlight and canned peas, but I def find myself thinking about it lately. Damn that Dennis Miller guy
OctGroom
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Everyday when I go to work I pass through the Lincoln Tunnel , the PA, and Penn Station. It is very scary to think of these places as 'dangerous'.. and not because of weirdos, freaks or perverts. But because of a bunch of hate driven fanatics who none of us ever did anything to. Sometimes I feel like.. let's just close the borders.. kick out anyone with known ties to terrorists.. or throw 'em in jail (or outta of plane. I know I'll catch flak for that.. but I really don't care)... I LOVE America and our freedom.. and thinking about this makes me whant to use the military and go get them and wipe em out.
I know my FW is scared. I have to take care of her.. Alleviate her fears and I try to do that. I was born in NYC.. but I'm not too sure I want to die in NYC. The cost of living, especially. But now to hear we're a target makes me scared but I'll never admit that to her. I want kids to grow up safe. I especially want her and them to be safe.
I really am concerned about this. But I do know one thing... I won't live in fear. I will not leave but I will be careful especially taking care of FW and future kids.
We all just gotta stay safe, stay alert and take care of each other too!
wenndypoo
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I hate to say this, but for me, ignorance is bliss. I don't think about it too much, and I don't spend too much time on the news. There is nothing I can do about it anyway, why torture myself? I am a big believer in fate and destiny. If it is my time to go, it is my time to go. I won't waste my life being afraid.
cluelessbride
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I basically live with the thought that if I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go....I love NY, especially NYC. I'd rather continue to live in NY and enjoy it while I can rather than move to be safe(r).
However, I wonder if my tune will change when I have children. Part of me thinks it will because I will need to keep myself alive for their sake. I know that sounds morbid, but I just mean that me or my FH die now, the other will be devastated but we're adults; we can take care of ourselves.
Rainmama
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It must feel awful to live in fear like that day after day. I'm fortunate to live in an area that would most likely NEVER be targeted although I do have family and friends who live in large cities. It scares the crap out of me. I feel for all of you.... STAY SAFE!!!
sandj100304
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I think about this everyday of my life, especially when I drop FH off at the train station each morning. I hate that he works in the city, goes to Penn Station twice a day and works only about 14 blocks form there. I am scared that everyday will be the last day I see him. I thought it was just me that lived with the fear. I hate what these terrorists have done to us, our nation, our world. I wonder sometimes if I even want to bring children into this sort of world, especially living in an area where another hit is likely.
ElleOct04
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Just wanted to add some thoughts, I used to think about it ALL the time, I used to live in NYC, was greatly affected by 9/11 and even when I moved worked in NYC , midtown--now I live on Long Island. To be honest, I was scared when I worked in the city and thought constantly about how I needed to find a job on LI because I did not want to fall victim to some 'attack.' I finally did but have to admit, I stil lhave friends in the city and I worry. It is scary that NY unortunately, has become sort of the target of the world...THAT SAID...I agree that you cannot live in fear and shut down your life but if it affects your life then you need to think about that as well. I know people say, they win if we're scared and while I understand that, I also don't want to be a victim. It's such a hard time we live in and I believe a lot more people think about this subject than discuss it. It is sad sometimes when you think this is what the world has come to but at the same time, you could live someplace else and something horrible could happen. I don't know....if any of this makes sense..I feel like I'm rambling but definitely an interesting topic......curious to hear what others have to say....
heidla
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My life experience has taught me that to live in fear is not living. I lost both my brothers at very young ages. My older brother was killed in a car accident when he was 20. Ten years later my younger brother who was 18 was killed in a car accident. I shut down and walked through my life in fear. Afraid to care about anything/anyone because it could all be gone tomorrow. After several years of faking an existence I finally realized that what I was doing to myself was unfair. How dare I take the gift of life and abuse it because I was afriad of what 'might' happen. I decided then to never take anything for granted. To always live as if everyday were my last. To appreciate and understand that even if I was taken tomorrow that I was already given more then alot of people ever experience.
9/11 changed everyone's lives. It made Americans realize that we are not untouchable. But to live in a state of constant fear is allowing them to win. It's cheating you and your loved ones out of precious time and let's face it none of us know how much of that we rally have. I for one would rather go knowing that I went living.
janwinterbridejoy
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I think that is natural to have fear because there are actual threats out there. there has been for years and we didnt know it and im sure there are more that they find out about every day and dont tell us for fear of the crazyiness that could happen. but the key is to know that they exist and pray for all of us but dont let them rule your life. you let people like osama bin laden win if we walk around with fear that we are going to die at any moment. i think we should live life to the fullest appreciate the people and things we have now not tomorrow.
my husband is a police officer and brooklyn and everytime there is a threat i walk around sick for days afraid when the phone rings and he is at work. but he is the first one to tell me that life will happen the way it is going to happen and me making my self sick is not going to help things. lori go on with your life and have an amazing wedding!!! that is the way we are going to beat these terrorists by not letting them win. we have to remember the terror attacks on 911 and the people that were lost that day and hopefully learn from that terrible day and the people that ran into those buildings to save lives.
we are all in this together and we are going to win. people like osama bin laden are the ones that are scared if he was a big tough guy would he be hiding in a cave like a bug?
sweetadeline
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ThongLori, I've been thinking about this subject a lot lately, too. I recently saw the Michael Moore movie, _Bowling for Columbine_. Have you seen it? Well, no matter how you feel about Michael Moore's politics, he makes a really interesting and mostly persuasive argument in this film about how mainstream American culture is, in many ways, built on fear (settlers' fear of Native Americans, southerners' fear of slave uprisings before the Civil War, et cetera -- he runs through a lot of examples). He then argues that this legacy of fear is what has made American society so much more violent than other societies (even though other nations have as many gun owners as the US does, they have far, far fewer shootings, statistically). He also claims that the media feeds into this fear -- violent stories and photos sell newspapers and bolster television ratings, so Americans see and live with fear every day. I guess my question is... even if we did capture Osama Bin Laden and even if we did destroy his network of operatives... wouldn't someone else come along to replace him? Who (or what) would we fear next? This kind of stuff keeps me awake at night.
I know that this is slightly off-topic from your initial question, but the two points seem related. After I saw _Bowling for Columbine_, I really started wondering about this fear cycle, and how we could possibly break it. Not that people's fear of, say, terrorism is unjustified, but is there a way that we can all, as Octgroom said above, take better care of each other and, in so doing, make this country a better place?
Jan05Bride
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bumping for the new terrorism talks on here
shelly3950
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What else needs to be said? Everyone expressed it well. For me, from time to time I have these fears, like today after the news report. But what can I do. 9/11 taught me that there is nothing I can do to avoid terrorism. Who is Oklahoma thought they woudl be victims? There is no safe place. There is also nothing you can do. So live life as you would anyway.
I had a small experience that taught me this. It was a few weeks after 9/11 and my best friend from college was moving frmo Boston to Texas. I was all set to go visit her to hang out one last time before her trip- and there were these vague warnings about something happening, so I cancelled my trip. And of course nothing happened, but she went to texas without me getting to say goodbye.
We need to live! That's the best revenge. I think (and hope) NY won't be a target again for that one reason. 9/11 did not stop NY! We kept going, and living and thriving!
cocoa
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you know that scene in adventures in babysitting where the gang member says 'dont f*** with the gang of whatever' and she pulls the knife out of the kids foot and says ' dont f*** with the babysitter'...that's how i feel...belive me, i think americans are ignorant and rude and obnoxious, but at the same time, are the most generous and giving people...peace corps, foreign adoptions, save the children, food donations, habitat for humanity, etc...we are a good bunch of people and not to get religious, b/c i'm not, but i really think that some higher power is on our side...i don't know why i feel that way, but i do...therefore, don't f*** with americans...or i'll kick your a$$. man, i really wish i were invincible...i'd give everyone a piece of my mind and an arse whoopin while i was at it.
