Seriously PEOPLE!!!

Ugh. I'm sorry.

Unfortunately the rule to live by (for most) is invite all or none. I know if we invited some kids and not others, our families would have our heads.

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Posted by Lsorrent

Ugh. I'm sorry.

Unfortunately the rule to live by (for most) is invite all or none. I know if we invited some kids and not others, our families would have our heads.

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Was just going to say that. We are having a flower girl, (cousins daughter), and my two little nephews as the ring bearers. THATS IT! After CH, they are leaving.

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Posted by Lsorrent

Ugh. I'm sorry.

Unfortunately the rule to live by (for most) is invite all or none. I know if we invited some kids and not others, our families would have our heads.

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yup - it's the truth. people are just too difficult to budge. Both of my fg's had large families but we explained to my aunts & uncles that it was unfortunate but the other kids were not invited. luckily they were happy about having a night for themselves lol, but it totally sux that ur situation has turned into this hopefully it turns for the better!

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Posted by ELluvsMB

I don't get why weddings cause so many problems...why people can't just understand things, accept them and move on. So here's the story...we ended up inviting FH's 2 younger cousins (9 and 6) because their younger brother (4) is our ring bearer. The parents don't have anyone to watch the kids and one parent would have had to stay home and miss the wedding so we decided just to have them all come, and it was a private discussion with the parents. They understood we were going out of our way to allow this. THEN FH's parents get a call from FH's uncle who was really angry that we didn't invite FH's other cousin's two daughters who are teenagers. He said if we could invite the kids we could invite them as well. Mind you we NEVER see his 2 daughters since he is divorced and they aren’t around too much. The thing is his Uncle knew we went beyond ourselves to invite the other kids and he knew they practically begged for us to allow them to come. Well, now the two daughters are invited too, FH's parents didn't want to start a fight and just said ok....so now we're having 5 extra kids who we have to pay for just to 'not cause problems' with the family. It's so absurd I don't get it!!!

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I fought this battle time and time again and lost horribly. Now when it comes to do the seating charts and the invites go out, Round two will begin. People really piss me off! Sorry you are going through this but it looks like Pandora's box has been opened. Good Luck

I know what you are going through ... FMIL is pulling that crap too!!

Good luck!!

Yup, I know what you mean. Me and my FW have been absolutely adamant about not allowing children to the wedding. Teenagers, fine, but NO one under a certain age. I believe we're cutting it off at around 12 or something. Basically, old enough to know that you don't go running around, pulling the cake out, yanking the bride's train, and crying during the ceremony.

Since both of our families know that I can VERY quickly become a Groomzilla if the situation arises, no one is even questioning it.

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Posted by KRISTIND

i am having a big problem with this.....we are inviting my first cousins and fh niece and of course his daughter....i do not want to invite any of our cousins kids....its not a place for children, his family thinks kids belong everywhere and its starting ww3, mind you we are not being selective, we are not inviting any of either of our cousins kids (because that would be like 30 kids) but his family thinks that if my first cousins get to come they should be able to bring their children....it is so not the same thing!!!!

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We had that issue. I have a lot of first cousins that are young that I am very close to. FH's first cousins are all much older, and all have millions of kids. We decided that our policy was to invite first cousin children. It's still a bit of a gray area, but no one's questioned it.....yet.

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Posted by Lsorrent

Ugh. I'm sorry.

Unfortunately the rule to live by (for most) is invite all or none. I know if we invited some kids and not others, our families would have our heads.

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I agree...we are inviting kids in our families...that is all. Most people understand...unfortunately, many do not. Sorry you are going through this.

My sister had the same problem with her husband family.All kids no matter the age came to the wedding regardless. i mean did they ruin her day no, was it annoying yes.

I dont get why teenagers and young children who in essence are part of the BP are the same thing. These teenagers dont need to go to a wedding.When I was a teenager being not invited to a wedding was a blessing!!!

Thanks for the feedback...I'm kinda over it at this point there's nothing more I can do. There's really no one else who can invite their kids so we just have to deal with it. BUT of course I get a call today from my sister saying my cousin asked her if he could bring his new girlfriend!!!! She said to call me lol. SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!! lol I don't even know what to say anymore the invite was written out to him and him alone, and I saw him recently and there was no mention of this so called girl!!

When I was a flower girl... I didn't go to the wedding at all. Not even the CH.

But My 2FG's and Ring bearer will be there for the entire party. They are FH's neices and nephews. I'm actually looking so forward to see how cute they will all look~!!!!!
I don't have a problem with it though because there are no other kids that anyone would really want to bring... bc they just don't exist. Our friends don't have kids (one does and she's looking forward to drinking and partying and not taking care of her baby all night long) and I have no young kids on my families side. I am inviting my cousins... who are 16 19 and 21. But to me they are older and they can come to the wedding.

I think the worst part of the kids coming is paying for them. As far as them acting up and all that.. well that's not for you to deal with.. it's for their parents to deal with. You will be sooo busy with all the other guests and with your new husband that you probably won't even notice them.

When I was young and my mother was invited to a wedding... I NEVER went! She found a babysitter for me. That's just how it always worked for us. If the kids are related (esp if they are close to you guys) then I understand but if they aren't they shouldn't be there unless they are invited. If the parent can't handle that then they ought to respond NO on the RSVP. JMHO.

I also think it's rude to bring people who aren't invited to someone else's wedding.. and yes that includes kids. You are really just asking for the bride and groom to fork up more money when they probably already busted their a$$es to save money for the wedding... it's an added expense and it's rude to do. I would never think to bring an extra friend to someone's wedding so why would my kid be any different?

I know certain cultures invite the whole household..... but that's a cultural difference and in that case it's the norm and not rude.

I heard one girl was making everyone who brought kids sit on their laps. She wouldn't get any extra seats for anyoen under 3 I think. So the parent had to REALLY deal with the kid. You want to bring them... You got them!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope I don't sound too harsh. I really love kids! I think they are tons of fun and I can't wait to have my own kids. And when I'm invited somewhere where my kids aren't then I will find a babysitter and they will stay home and I will enjoy my much needed night out!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by ELluvsMB

Thanks for the feedback...I'm kinda over it at this point there's nothing more I can do. There's really no one else who can invite their kids so we just have to deal with it. BUT of course I get a call today from my sister saying my cousin asked her if he could bring his new girlfriend!!!! She said to call me lol. SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!! lol I don't even know what to say anymore the invite was written out to him and him alone, and I saw him recently and there was no mention of this so called girl!!

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how old is he?

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Posted by KerriJohnS

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Posted by ELluvsMB

Thanks for the feedback...I'm kinda over it at this point there's nothing more I can do. There's really no one else who can invite their kids so we just have to deal with it. BUT of course I get a call today from my sister saying my cousin asked her if he could bring his new girlfriend!!!! She said to call me lol. SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!! lol I don't even know what to say anymore the invite was written out to him and him alone, and I saw him recently and there was no mention of this so called girl!!

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how old is he?

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He's my age...25. I feel like with the wedding 2 months away who knows if she'll even be around by then!