Sister Passed away

Hey guys! I'm new to the boards so bare with my lingo. I just got engaged in Oct. and we are getting married in april 2011. Last Nov. my only sister passed away suddenly while i was down visiting her in fla. She obviously would have been my MOH so I know no matter what it will be a tough day. I want to remember her in a special way on my wedding day. I plan on doing a table with pictures of all the special people who were lost in our lives, but wanted to do something special during the ceremony. Besides just reading names I heard of a few things and I just was wondering if you could give some feed back

1) Releasing a dove. I kind of like this idea but not crazy about it. I don't know birds kind of creep me out!

2) Releasing a butterfly! i really like this one b/c she loved butterflys! has anyone seen this??

also I heard of what ever the center pieces are having one white rose coming out of each of them. Has anyone seen or heard of that?

Thanks for any feedback!

I can totally relate to your situation..my only sister passed away when I was a teenager...I personally do not like the doves b/c I have heard of people opening the cage and the bird being dead

I like the white rose idea...I am doing a memorial candle and a bouquet charm with her picture and my fathers

Just remember she will be watching over you

FM me if you ever want to talk

Is there a special personal belonging of hers like a hair ribbon that you could wrap around your bouquet? Others may not know about it, but you will be carrying it as you walk down the aisle.

The deacon who is marrying us was telling us about the butterfly release once (he started going off on a tangent....), and said it comes out pretty amazing.

I am so sorry to hear about all of this. Don't rush to make a decision. Your special tribute will come to you. You know your sister best. Keep your head up. We are here for you

I'm sorry for your loss

I heard of people lighting memorial candles for their loved ones during the ceremony.

i'm so sorry for your loss


I'm not sure where you would get butterflies from, but I know I have heard of it before, so I'd say there is def a chance of it

I think the memorial candle would be nice way to remember her. I'm so sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry about your sister. It must be hard to go through this process without her.

I personally would never do the dove release or butterfly release. I have heard too many horror stories about them - I've heard a lot of disagreement with dove releases because it puts caged doves out into the wild in an unfamiliar area, sometimes in cold temperatures, and a lot of them get lost and can't fend for themselves and die. The butterfly release is a nice idea but I've heard (and seen on tv) that sometimes when you open the thing to release the butterflies, they are either dead or just fall out and fall on the ground. I remember one show doing it where the bride and groom wound up walking all over the fallen butterflies on their way back down the aisle. I think something like that would distract attention from the nice thing you want to do.

There are a lot of other ways you can honor your sister - you can have her mentioned during your ceremony, have a memory candle for her, incorporate something she loved into your whole wedding - an '09 bride did a lovely thing with ladybugs throughout her wedding decor that was really nice because her mother loved them. Or you could wrap your bouquet with something that belonged to her.

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Posted by DWKSwed

I'm so sorry about your sister. It must be hard to go through this process without her.

I personally would never do the dove release or butterfly release. I have heard too many horror stories about them - I've heard a lot of disagreement with dove releases because it puts caged doves out into the wild in an unfamiliar area, sometimes in cold temperatures, and a lot of them get lost and can't fend for themselves and die. The butterfly release is a nice idea but I've heard (and seen on tv) that sometimes when you open the thing to release the butterflies, they are either dead or just fall out and fall on the ground. I remember one show doing it where the bride and groom wound up walking all over the fallen butterflies on their way back down the aisle. I think something like that would distract attention from the nice thing you want to do.

There are a lot of other ways you can honor your sister - you can have her mentioned during your ceremony, have a memory candle for her, incorporate something she loved into your whole wedding - an '09 bride did a lovely thing with ladybugs throughout her wedding decor that was really nice because her mother loved them. Or you could wrap your bouquet with something that belonged to her.

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agree totally with this.... sorry for your loss

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Posted by JenBill61210

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Posted by DWKSwed

I'm so sorry about your sister. It must be hard to go through this process without her.

I personally would never do the dove release or butterfly release. I have heard too many horror stories about them - I've heard a lot of disagreement with dove releases because it puts caged doves out into the wild in an unfamiliar area, sometimes in cold temperatures, and a lot of them get lost and can't fend for themselves and die. The butterfly release is a nice idea but I've heard (and seen on tv) that sometimes when you open the thing to release the butterflies, they are either dead or just fall out and fall on the ground. I remember one show doing it where the bride and groom wound up walking all over the fallen butterflies on their way back down the aisle. I think something like that would distract attention from the nice thing you want to do.

There are a lot of other ways you can honor your sister - you can have her mentioned during your ceremony, have a memory candle for her, incorporate something she loved into your whole wedding - an '09 bride did a lovely thing with ladybugs throughout her wedding decor that was really nice because her mother loved them. Or you could wrap your bouquet with something that belonged to her.

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agree totally with this.... sorry for your loss

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Ditto. More often than not, the doves/butterflies don't survive. I'd do a memorial candle or maybe the rose on an empty seat. I'm so sorry for your loss.

before you think of using a dove, how about reading this article first:

Dozens of Doves Dumped in Queens Seek Homes

I'm not a die-hard pet activist but after reading this, I had to change my 'dove-release' plans.

how about adding a locket or a mini-photo of your sister in your bridal bouquet?

sorry for your loss

first off i am so sorry this happened to you

you could include her in the program and have your officiant mention hr during the ceremony

i have also sen people carry a pic of a loved one on a bo-k or pace a single rose on the seat they would have sat at

also you coud put some pics of th two of you at your recepton hall

My sister passed away suddenly 9 days before my wedding in October. She was supposed to be in attendance at the wedding, so we left her seat open at the reception & had a corsage with a small picture of her put at her place setting.

oh yea & for my birthday (which was 4 days before the wedding) my DH bought me my sister's favorite perfume so i could wear it on my wedding day