Is it rude to the bridal party to not have one? I would give my girls their gifts at the bachelorette party and he would give the guys theirs at the bachelor party.
We have a small bridal party, and honestly, I feel like rehearsal dinners are a hassle for people to attend a lot of the time. FH may not even be able to get off of work to go to our own rehearsal (long story behind why, but it is true). I really don't want to be standing up there 'rehearsing' by myself. We have SO MUCH to pay for, and I would love to be able to put all of that $$$$ towards something else... What do you think?
Do you think I could ask FMIL to pay for another wedding expense (like the limos) and 'skip' the rehearsal dinner altogether since she offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner (and nothing else)? Is it rude to ask her to do that?
The Catholic Church doesn't 'require' you to have a rehearsal, does it?
Sorry for all of the questions... thanks for your input girls, as always!!!!!!
july06bride
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
i guess you could still have church rehearsal and not do a dinner...
I am not sure though-
lullabella
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
If you can't work it out - skip it. The BP won't care!
dpli
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I don't know if the church requires a rehearsal, but I think most want you to have one. However, several of the people involved in our wedding couldn't make the rehearsal and it really wasn't a big deal. I think it is more so you all know what to do the day of, but the limo drivers could probably instruct you since they have done so many of them. Mine actually was the one that told me when to start walking down the aisle.
As for the dinner, my brother didn't have one, partly for the reason you mentioned. I wouldn't worry about it, but I think the best way to avoid a rehearsal dinner is to avoid the rehearsal if you can.
jeanla4c
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I think it is fine, but may want to check with your FIL's, some really want to host something and have it....could always just do an informal dinner (not reserved room/space) with whoever wants after the rehearsal (if you have one), but give your gifts at the time you want to earlier.
tjs
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I don't think that its rude at all. When we met with our deacon he said that a rehearsal isn't even necessary. He said that there is one aisle to walk up and u cant really make mistakes and that the priest will basically guide you that day. A lot of my bridal party is from out of town SO we really plan on skipping the rehearsal! I totally agree that the money can be spent on other things!
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I’m not having one. And I've been in a wedding BP that didn’t have one.
Sure, why not? Have the church rehearsal a little later to give people time to have dinner at home first and then after the church, just go home. I was toying with that idea for a while.
pinkstar025
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
i think its fine not to have one....but i wouldnt ask my FILs to pay for something else...let them come up with that on their own
103005FallBride
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I have to say...reading this post makes me feel good! I was struggling to figure out what we were going to do... We are paying for everything 100% and need to cut corners where we can. The rehersal dinner is one of them...especially being we wouldn't be rehersing the day before. We're getting married at the WM and will have our rehersal the day of. (minus me!) I was thinking of having something low key just so we could all get together and do a quick run through...mostly for the kids. Thank you thank you thank you...this makes me feel so much better.
wood2be
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I'm not sure if you have to have a rehearsal in the Catholic Church or not. For us it was a good thing because there were little details that we would not have known about otherwise and it made the actual ceremony go more smoothly. As for the dinner, I don't think you have to have one. Both of my sisters MIL's had a family dinner at their homes. It doesn't have to be a major dinner.
M&LSept1606
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
we're considering not having a rehersal as well. there isn't much to reherse. we're getting married at our reception venue.
we may have adinner with the bridal party to give our thanks and gifts. that is not necessary either though.
these days nothing is 'the way it should be' it's all about what you want to do. weddings used to all be the same, now it's not like that anymore.
wood2be
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
Posted by M&LSept1606 these days nothing is 'the way it should be' it's all about what you want to do. weddings used to all be the same, now it's not like that anymore.
Exactly! It should be the way you want it and what you can afford.
amazon_gracie
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I agree with the other ladies. Don't feel obligated to do everything you think you're supposed to do. It's your wedding! I think it's okay to pick and choose and I think your BP will be fine w/o one.
PrincessConsuela
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
we are not having one. our wedding is on a friday night and my oot guests are probably not comming in until thrusday night. we may just get heros and such at my house the night before. nothing fancy. we are not doing a rehersal until that day we are getting married at the hall.
MrsNYPDsGirl
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Wow - thanks girls! I am somewhat surprised by all of the positive posts. You have all made me feel better about possibly skipping the rehearsal dinner!!!!!
jersee3380
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
its up to you guys ... BUT .. if IL already said they would pay for the RD, I would ask them first to make sure there aren't any hard feelings and then ask them if you could put that $$ towards ssomething else.
CaCRmr
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I know my chuch told us we HAD to attend the rehearsal. We chose to have the dinner but that I know you don't have to have. As for you asking you in-laws to pay for something else, I would wait until they ask you instead of 'telling' them. JMHO
candb
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I don't think you need a rehearsal dinner. As for your IL's, I would tell them that you decided against a rehearsal dinner (explain why) and that you know they wanted to be involved somehow in the wedding, so if they would like to contribute to the limo expense you would LOVE it!
TEDNJENN
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Re: Skipping the rehearsal dinner?
I was in a BP and we had the rehearsal at there apartment then they made dinner for us and then we went to our favorite hang out. The BP consisted of 12 people....
