so frustrated- NWR

I keep seeing posts about how people are closing on houses all the time, and I just don't understand how anyone does it.
FH and I make pretty decent money together, and there is no way we could affford a house. When I see these house posts it makes me want to cry. How are people doing it?

I feel the same way, and FI and I combined make 100K+ and we still don't have enough for a downpayment.

Then again, we don't want to buy a house right now b/c we're NYC'ers...and would only consider a condo or coop or something...

What I really don't get are the 'younger' couples (22-25) who do it....I just assumed it was being borrowed from family or a bank or something, and FI and I want to do it on our own...

I totally understand how you feel. And i few months ago i would have said the exact same thing. My FH and i started looking at houses and they were all so extremely expensive and even though between the both of us... we make over $100,000 a year, we still couldn't afford anything.

The only way we're able to do it is because we found a piece of land which we are closing on on april 7th. And my FH's uncle is in the modular home business. Without his help, we wouldn't be able to have a house for many years.

We just got lucky and are able to build our house way earlier than we expected. House hunting is frustrating and mortgages don't make it easy on you. It's hard... but don't stress, you'll get there.

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Posted by itslaurie.

selling organs.

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sometimes it feels like it doesn't it. YOu beg, borrow and steal along the way. Well not steal, but you get the point.

I know exactly how you feel, Lauren. But I really try not to let it bother me, we'll cross that path when we come to it. Everyone has different situations and I don't want to compare us to other couples, we'll get into a house at some point when it's right for us.

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Posted by itslaurie.

selling organs.

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How much you think I can get for FI's brain??? It's not like he uses it much...

We are closing on a home in North Bellmore in April, and paying for our own Oct wedding.

We have both lived with our parents for the past two years. That is the ONLY way we have been able to save enough $$$.

I'm going to be a young bride...well youngish..24 after we get married, and we just bought a house in December...we got it the old fashioned way..by saving money...however, its in NC! So we didn't need that crazy down payment like you would a house up here!! If that was the case we would be renting like everyone else!
Hopefully the prices go down...the interest rates are going up...so prices should go down significantly!

Good Luck Ladies

BTW - i'm not bragging or anything...just wanted to say that i didn't borrow, steal or sell my FI brain to get it, lol

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Posted by SoontobeMrsR72806

I'm going to be a young bride...well youngish..24 after we get married, and we just bought a house in December...we got it the old fashioned way..by saving money...however, its in NC! So we didn't need that crazy down payment like you would a house up here!! If that was the case we would be renting like everyone else!
Hopefully the prices go down...the interest rates are going up...so prices should go down significantly!

Good Luck Ladies

BTW - i'm not bragging or anything...just wanted to say that i didn't borrow, steal or sell my FI brain to get it, lol

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I need to move out of the state...smart move! Congrats and best wishes on your new home!

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Posted by ChrissynRicky

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Posted by SoontobeMrsR72806

I'm going to be a young bride...well youngish..24 after we get married, and we just bought a house in December...we got it the old fashioned way..by saving money...however, its in NC! So we didn't need that crazy down payment like you would a house up here!! If that was the case we would be renting like everyone else!
Hopefully the prices go down...the interest rates are going up...so prices should go down significantly!

Good Luck Ladies

BTW - i'm not bragging or anything...just wanted to say that i didn't borrow, steal or sell my FI brain to get it, lol

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I need to move out of the state...smart move! Congrats and best wishes on your new home!

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Yeah, I keep thinking about moving away from the NYC area more and more... but I really love it here.... why do 'they' have to make it so dam hard?

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Posted by ChrissynRicky


I need to move out of the state...smart move!

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we are seriously considering that.

Thanks!!!
Its going to be rough leaving everything i know behind...including my family...but FI got a better job and I couldn't let him turn it down!
Its crazy what you can get down there for your money...The house we bought is brand new and seriously if it was a house up here it would probably cost almost a million!!! now i just have to furnish the thing!!!


idk why everything is so hard here! Its sad that 'they' make it this way!

i wasnt easy that is for sure - but i also planned on it well before i was even engaged. but - sometimes count your blessings - cause its truly not for everyone. i have literally wanted to tear my hair out with the experience - between banks, mortage rates, sellers, pay stubs, signatures, notarized....UGHHHH

there have been times i wish we werent doing this now - but i am glad we did. one thing in life i have learned is to never compare yourself to what other people are doing. you have to do what is right for you.

one thing you have to remember on these boards. everyone has different life situations. i think it's the source for any 'drama' that we get into. although we may all be from the NYC metro area, we are all different people.

some of the people who bought a house, may have gotten a sizeable gift from parents. maybe their weddings are a lot smaller and cost a lot cheaper. maybe they are struggling and won't admit it online.

you just have to do what is right for you!

Do NOt get frustrated. This is LI for you.
FI and i bought a co-op not a house. We were also VERY lucky bc his parents gave us an EXTREMELY GENEROUS monatary engagement gift or we would have NEVER been able to do it either.

save save save. Fh and i make a good salary and we have 3 houses. One is being built and the others are investments. Sometimes i dont know how we do it either. But u have to have a lot of discipline and be willing to struggle ALOT. It all works out in the end though. Good luck!


By the way our 3 houses are in PA no way will we pay the high prices here in NY.

We saved for 5 years. We bought 5 years after we were married. We just weren't ready and really started to save after about 2 years. Then when we thought we had a downpayment we found out about closing costs!

We bought when there were bidding wars with the homes. We got outbid at least 10 times and that's with bidding ask!

So that delayed us quite a bit. The market has calmed down now but the prices are higher now too.

Also when I got married we weren't making what we make now.

We had to wait and save. That's just our situation. We had a really great apartment and landlords and that made it easier to wait and save too.

Also we just bought a condo as well as an investment so things do get better.

We are a young couple- fh is 26 and I am 24...we both have good jobs- but I dont make a lot- I am a newer teacher just starting out...
We bought a house over the summer...we were able to do it because FH had owned a condo which he paid peanuts for...we fixed it up...and we were able to sell it for a lot more money, which went towards a down payment, plus some savings we had. We are not paying for the majority of the wedding, if we were we would NOT have been able to buy a house! That's for sure!

It is not always easy- owning a house is wonderful! BUT, it is hard work too- and saving is not coming super easy lately...But we manage.

My suggestion is not to get down- just think...wedding is coming...you will have a down payment or almost that hopefully. It will come ni time...you do not want to buy a house and then not have ANY money at all to go out, shop a little...thats no fun...It will happen when the time is right for you : ) Good luck

ETA- Also not bragging AT ALL...just saying...it does happen that people can buy a house without borrowing from parents, which we did not do