I'm such a pain but I am still having a hard time. FH and I decided that it may be easier to do pictures before the wedding. Our ceremony is at 530 pm on a Sunday at the RH. Cocktail hour starts at 6 pm.
When I was a little girl.. all I dreamed about was walking down the aisle and seeing some shocked look on the man at the end of the aisle's face.
Little did I know.. that I would get to marry my High School Sweetheart.. and after being together for seven years.. almost nine when were married.. little that we do shocks one another.
I don't want to feel like I didn't get all the pictures I wanted.. I don't want to miss my Cocktail Hour.. I don't REALLY want to have FH see me before the wedding.. but I feel like I am settling for convenience.
IF we don't do pictures before I literally only have one hour. I will only have pictures at the RH of us together. I will most definitely miss our cocktail hour. We may not get all the shots we want.
I know.. I want it all.. but.. what do you ladies think?
SummerBeauty
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P.S. FH's family DOES NOT want us to see each other before the wedding...... and they want us to get married at a church. SO this is not going very well.
Kris10nGerard
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I am lucky enough to not be in this position nor do I know what I would do in it. My only suggestion is maybe make a list of the pros and cons of both to help you decide which is better. Is there any way to make your CH an extra half hour? and will they bring food to your bridal suite? I know those were options we were given at our place.
SummerBeauty
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Definitely will bring food to the bridal suite. We did make a list of pros and cons. Pros outweighed cons.. but. I am still not happy with that..
hildie
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I know how u feel.. IDK what I would do either luckily will be having a big gap in between.. how about pushing ur CH back by maybe 1/2 hour maybe even an hour.. giving ur photographer a must take pics list to cut to the chase? and then maybe just attending ur ch for the last half an hour??
b2b2013
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Posted by hildie
I know how u feel.. IDK what I would do either luckily will be having a big gap in between.. how about pushing ur CH back by maybe 1/2 hour maybe even an hour.. giving ur photographer a must take pics list to cut to the chase? and then maybe just attending ur ch for the last half an hour??
THIS! I think giving yourself the extra 1/2 hour for pics with a list and missing part of your CH would make the most sense
jassy119
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Re: So Torn...
I know exactly how you feel. I went through the same dilema. I always imagined my FH not seeing me until I walk down the aisle but like you I am having the ceremony in the same place so I have no gap in btwn. Plus my ceremony as of now is 7pm. If we wait to see each other we'll get no pix in the sunlight bcuz sun sets about 6:30 in Oct. Plus we really want to attend our CH. So after giving it much thought and finally making peace with the idea we have decided to do a 1st view. We get an 1 1/2 b4 our ceremony to take pix @ Swan. Plus we are thinking of getting ready at a nearby hotel so hopefully we'll get to take pix thr also. That way we can get lots of the picture taking done b4 the wedding and have time to really enjoy our CH and reception.
Irishbride16
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Re: So Torn...
I have the same problem...Im having an early wedding the wedding itself starts at 11 and CH starts at 1 ...so we are def. strapped for time ...so i did put the idea out there to see him b/f the church but FH said no way ...i want to see me at the church ..so what we are doing we r not having a receiving line...b/c thats a waste of time and plus i will see everyone at the CH ...so thats what we are doing ...i would really think about that ...plus if u have a good photographer he/ she will take good pictures and be done so u can enjoy the CH ...
SummerBeauty
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Thanks for the input ladies. I think I have worn this subject out with FH because I am not totally happy with the outcome either way. I don't think he really wants to talk about it anymore.. I guess I'll just sit on it for a while before I decide anything.. I just wish the circumstances were different.
Thanks for listening to me whine like a brat.
Irishbride16
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Aww...yea its hard ..but the good thing you have a while to think about it ..but dont let it stress you out so much
MarryingMyBFF1110
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Crashing:
I felt the same way, but ultimately decided we will see each other before hand, bc we are paying wayy to much money to miss cocktail hour.
Our plan:
The photog says he does this all the time - the 'Big Reveal'. He sets everything up, as if you were walking down an aisle (just wherever you will be) and all pics are taken, just as they would be in the church, or wherever.
For me, this solves the problem, because we'll get the pics of his face as he first sees me, etc. etc, and we won't miss cocktail hour.
HTH.
SummerBeauty
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Re: So Torn...
Posted by MarryingMyBFF1110
Crashing:
I felt the same way, but ultimately decided we will see each other before hand, bc we are paying wayy to much money to miss cocktail hour.
Our plan:
The photog says he does this all the time - the 'Big Reveal'. He sets everything up, as if you were walking down an aisle (just wherever you will be) and all pics are taken, just as they would be in the church, or wherever.
For me, this solves the problem, because we'll get the pics of his face as he first sees me, etc. etc, and we won't miss cocktail hour.
HTH.
Thanks for your response and input. I guess I just feel like when I'm walking down the aisle..it will feel kind of staged since he would have already seen me.. I would love to see your pics after your wedding. Happy planning & thanks again!
KristyANDMatt224
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Re: So Torn...
ITA! I tried to be flexible with this but I can't. This is one tradition that I want to keep. I feel like seeing him first will take all those emotions away as I walk down aisle. I totally get the 'big reveal' and the time savers though! It's a personal preference. Just make sure your photographer works with you 100% on whichever you choose
SummerBeauty
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Kristy--how is the timeline of your day going? What time is the ceremony & the CH?
BellaRegina
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I posted this exact topic (might be on BHB). I'm going to go with the 'first view' aka 'big revile',,,, it just works better for us.
Jill52787
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**crashing**
I too at first was convinced that i wanted to see him first as I walk down the aisle. But with the amount of $ we are paying we do not want to miss a minute of our day.
We decided to do a reveal, where our photog and videographer will videotape the first time we see each other, and we will pick who will be there. (bp and maybe immediate family). I am actually really excited about it because its going to be so intimate.
I don't think it will take away from the moment that you walk down the aisle. Just an option
KristyANDMatt224
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Posted by SummerBeauty
Kristy--how is the timeline of your day going? What time is the ceremony & the CH?
Ok-the girls are getting ready in massapequa, the boys will be in levittown. The photographer will come to the girls for an hour ish, then EITHER to L-town for the boys OR just take those shots at Sand Castle. We don't have a preference..
so, estimation; hair/make up girls -9 maybe? depends on how many girls are getting done up and how many girls i hire photo for the girls 11:00 ish limo 12:00 ish be at hall 12:30 ish take as many separate pics as we can ceremony family & BP pix -hopefully be in CH by 3:30
SummerBeauty
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Thank you for your timeline.
Your day will be beautiful!
KristyANDMatt224
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Posted by SummerBeauty
Thank you for your timeline.
Your day will be beautiful!
Aw thank you! I'm sure the timeline will change as I get closer and have those vendors booked
Debbie2011
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Re: So Torn...
hi from an '11 bride!
rather than looking at the negatives about each scenario (ie: you won't have the authentic first look as you walk down the aisle, or you won't be able to enjoy your cocktail hour), maybe focus on just the positives. what WILL you get out of each scenario?
we did our reveal at 3:00 at our RH (our ceremony started at 6:00). the reveal was just the two of us and our photographers, and i have to say, it was such a wonderful experience - a 'different' experience than would have been had if we waited until the ceremony. not better... not worse... just different.
i think once you make your decision, you will start to envision that part of your wedding and *hopefully* you will focus on the good parts of that decision. whatever you decide to do, it was be the RIGHT decision for you!! :)
